Bella's Sun 2

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Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:05pm

 

Author's Note: Thank you so much for everyone being so patient with me, let's hope it was worth the wait. :) Warning if you cried in the battle when Sam died, then you might need a tissue.

 

Bella's Sun Part 2

 

Chapter 1 – THE SUN RISES

 

Song - Jacob's Theme: Eclipse

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NcE3ATXezUk

 

JACOB'S POV

 

As I walked along a new day was unfolding. The sky began to glow as the sun emerged across the horizon, trying its best to break through the harsh clouds that had gathered together. Lightning flashed across the sky a warning to those around that a storm was approaching. Unfortunately my own storm had come during the night as my Bella was stolen and I carried Sam's lifeless body in my arms. I placed one foot in front of the other methodically, feeling completely useless and I had no idea what to do next.

 

The sky opened and large rain drops began to fall, it was not a harsh rain but it was consistent almost like tear drops falling from the sky. The water ran across Sam's body and I was able to wash away the blood and dirt from his body. I could hear wailing and screams as I got closer to Sam and Emily's house. The agonizing screams I recognized as Seth, I guessed that he was able to phase back to human, but it was clear that he was still in extreme pain. I could smell Carlisle so I assumed that he was there.

 

I came towards the house and I could see Emily and Leah both sitting on the front porch wrapped in each other's arms. It was nice that they could be there for each other, but I hated the reason why they were crying. Leah heard me coming and when she looked at me and I could see her eyes were red and swollen. She nudged Emily and the moment that she saw me, she flung herself from the porch running towards me. I was surprised by the force of her as she slammed herself into Sam, clutching to his shoulders.

 

I had one arm around his back the other behind his knees and I slowly lowered him to the ground. Emily curled herself into his chest and sobbed. The rain continued to fall, soaking her, but she didn't care. I knelt down on Sam's other side and placed my hands on Emily's back. I didn't have any words to make it better and it wasn't until I tasted the salt on my lips that I realized that I was crying too. Slowly, her hands fluttered over his hair and face, as she kissed his cheek, chin, neck and brought his arm up to her chest and then pressed his hand into her stomach.

 

“What am I going to do?” Emily whispered between sobs.

“I don't know,” I answered. “While I know that no one could replace him, Emily, you are not alone. We will take care of you.”

It was then that I noticed my pack family had surrounded us and Paul, Jared, Leah, Quil, Embry, Colin, and Brady came down onto their knees and placed one hand on Sam and another hand on Emily, giving her their silent reassurance and comfort. Another scream erupted from inside the house and I saw Leah flinch and Embry put an arm around her.

 

“What is going on in there?” I quietly asked Embry.

“Seth is healing too quickly, so Carlisle has to re-break some of the bones. First it was his arm and shoulder. Now, it is all along his spine so at times Seth can't feel anything at all until the nerves begin to heal and then he feels the pain. He has passed out a few times, but it sounds like he woke up again.” Embry answered.

“Make sure someone stays with Emily until I come back.”

“Alright.”

 

I left the mourning group to go check on Seth. When I walked in the front door I saw Seth lying on his side on the living room rug with Carlisle at his back. Sue was at the kitchen table shaking and my dad was next to her, holding her. I made eye contact with him for a moment and then I walked to Seth and knelt on the floor.

“Is there anything I can do?” I asked Carlisle.

“Jake . . .” Seth moaned and his face cringed in pain.

“Hey buddy, you hang in there.” I placed my hand on his head as Seth began to mumble.

“I'm . . . I'm . . . I'm s . . . s. . . sor . . . sorry.” Seth groaned.

 

Instantly I knew that he felt guilty that Bella was taken while she was with him. “Seth, no.” I shook my head. “I don't blame you.”

“It is time for more morphine for him.” Carlisle informed me. He went to his bag, sitting on the couch and got what he needed. Almost instantly he had a syringe filled and emptied it into Seth and I could hear Seth's moans lessened into silence.

“Now what?” I asked.

“I'll have a few minutes before he wakes up again.” Carlisle answered as he moved his hands incredibly fast down Seth's body. I held Seth tightly so that he wouldn't move while Carlisle was feeling the bones and I would hear a snapping sound as the bones were being realigned.

 

I waited in silent agony. I felt like everyone around me was suffering. I could hear Emily crying outside and Sue's torment inside each time one of Seth's bones was reset. Dad had one hand holding her head to his chest and the other making calming circles on her back, but that didn't keep her body shaking. At the moment Seth was quiet and still, but slowly he started to shift his shoulders and moan in pain each time his shoulder moved.

“Hold him still.” Carlisle instructed and I laid down on the floor, bringing Seth's chest to mine and held him tighter. As the morphine started to lose its effect on him, his moans turned to screams.

“How much more do you have to do?” I asked.

“His back is almost finished, the bones there are so delicate that I have to be extremely careful and I have to make sure that they are correct when I align them.”

“He isn't moving.” I mentioned nervously, indicating his lifeless legs.

“I know.”

 

“Are you saying that Seth is paralyzed?” I was breathing heavily, and I couldn't imagine anything that we couldn't heal from.

“I'm not sure, yet. Obviously he has had an extremely bad back injury, however I am encouraged that with each new section that is aligned correctly he is getting more movement, but he is also getting more pain.”

I took a deep breath. “Alright, I'm ready when you are.” I told him.

Seth was given another round of morphine and his head rested against my shoulder, which allowed me to be able to relax for a moment. Carlisle finished correcting the final section in his back.

 

“Assuming that he doesn't hurt himself again, there is not much more that I can do for him.” Carlisle said. “He needs to try and remain as still as possible and when his nerves reconnect he will hurt over his entire body.”

“Does he need to stay on his side?”

“Either his side or his stomach, as long as he doesn't arch his back.”

“Will you ask Quil to come inside, please?” I asked.

“Absolutely.” Carlisle got up and I heard him call for Quil.

 

Quil walked in, soaking wet from the rain that still poured outside, he crouched on the floor with me and I explained to him what Carlisle told me. And as Seth began to wake up again I held him tightly to my chest and Quil watched over his hips and legs ready to keep them still if they moved, as Seth screamed.

“Seth, try to calm down, buddy.” I whispered to him. “The worst is over, Carlisle is finished.” His body was starting to sweat as it was working hard to put himself back together. I could feel him trying to relax, but at the same time he was in so much pain. Finally Seth's pain was so strong that he passed out, he would randomly twitch therefore Quil and I made sure that his back wasn't arching.

“Quil, how is Emily?” I asked him.

“Not good. I think I would rather deal with Seth's screaming. At least this will be over in a few hours,” he shrugged.

 

“What does she know about how Sam died?” I asked.

“Nothing really. We carried Seth to her house and laid him here and with all the commotion, I think it took her a little bit to realize that you and Sam weren't here. Then she started asking where Sam was and no one knew how to answer her. Embry told her that you were bringing him, and instantly she knew something was wrong.”

“I told her that Sam didn't make it.” I felt a small warm hand on my shoulder, looked, and saw Leah.

“Leah, I'm sorry you had to do that.”

“I didn't, I chose to.” She took a deep breath.

 

“How is he?” she asked, nodding her head towards Seth.

He would moan randomly and I had both arms around him holding him to me. I could feel his chest rise and fall and just that simple movement seemed to be painful. He would twitch his shoulders which was even more painful, but his hips and legs still seemed completely still. “Too soon to know for sure. Quil, is he moving for you?” I asked.

“No.” Quil answered.

“Oh, God please.” I heard Sue mumble in the kitchen.

“Leah, can you take over here for me?” I asked.

“Sure . . . um,” she grabbed the blanket that was folded on the back of the couch and laid it over Seth's body. It barely registered to me at all that he was naked, but I could see how uncomfortable that must be for his sister.

 

“Seth, I need you to be still for me. I need to get up and Leah is going to be here for you.”

“Alright,” he groaned.

I slowly removed my arms from him and then lifted myself off the ground and Leah laid down and wrapped her arms around her brother. I walked into the kitchen, Sue had stopped crying and she had her head resting on one palm, she looked tired, and Dad had her other hand. It made me wonder if they had been up all night as well, knowing that the army was coming.

“Hey Dad.” I sat roughly in the chair next to him. “What do I need to be doing?”

“Jake, don't worry, Son. We will help you.”

“Thanks.”

 

“Old Quil was here, but he is already starting to work on the funeral arrangements and I'll help him when he needs it.” Dad reassured.

“Excuse me.” Sue said as she got up from the table. I assumed to give us some privacy and then I saw her go into the kitchen and started getting things out for us to eat. Even though I didn't feel like eating, I knew that I was hungry.

“Thank you, Sue.” I acknowledged her.

“You are very welcome. It is actually really great to have something to do.” Sue replied.

 

“Is there anything I need to do for the funeral?” The last funeral I went to was mom's and I did the best I could avoid going to any others, so I really had no idea what to expect. No one liked funerals, but as acting chief of our tribe Dad attended all funerals so I knew he would know what to do.

“There will be a few things, but we can cover that later.”

“When will it be?”

“Tonight at sunset, we will have a bonfire for the pack and then at sunrise we will place him in the sacred grounds. Right now just stay here, be available to your pack and to Emily.”

 

My pack. It was the first time that my dad acknowledged what we both knew, that I was now alpha. He saw the fear in my eyes. “You'll be just fine, Jake. Trust me.”

I just nodded my head and tried to swallow the lump in my throat, unable to speak.

“Where is Rachel?” I asked.

“She was staying the night with a friend last night, so I haven't seen her today. It used to be noon before she would wake up, so I think we still have several hours before she will know anything.”

“Does anyone else in the tribe know about Sam?” I asked.

“No, but they will soon. Once we start preparing his body there isn't really a good way to keep death a secret, and there really is no reason to. We will just call it a terrible camping accident.”

“Alright.”

 

“How did you know what was coming?” I asked.

“We knew something was going on when Paul and Jared went to Sam, he called me and I called Old Quil and Sue. There weren't many details then, all we knew was that some vampires were coming and that Edward would be with you all. It wasn't until Collin and Brady came back to stay on our land, that we knew more. Sam had them come here first to fill us in on what was going on and that was last we heard until several hours later they carried Seth here.”

“Have you been up all night?” I asked Dad.

“Mostly, Old Quil, Sue, Emily and I have been here. Old Quil slept on the couch, I might have dozed off some, and they cooked knowing that you all would be tired and hungry when you got home.

 

We sat there in a comfortable silence, and I began to worry about Bella. Where was she? Was she okay? My blood boiled through my veins at the thought of that red leech changing her or killing her. I honestly wasn't sure anymore which one was worse, the Cullens have become more like 'people' but I still would never want that for Bella. The mere thought was enough to make my whole body shake, wanting the wolf to take over, find that bloodsucker and rip her head off. I told dad about her being taken and that the Cullens were out looking for her. He knew, saying that Quil had told him when they brought Seth back. He placed his hand over mine, to calm me down, and I gave him a weak smile.

 

Even though it had only been a couple hours, I hoped that maybe they were close to finding her. So I got up and called Edward, but Jasper answered. They were almost to Seattle and would be meeting Edward and Esme soon. Alice confirmed that Bella was still alive and promised to call if she knew something new.

 

After I hung up, I looked around at everything going on around me, and slowly I began to function, but I felt like a zombie just moving around, but not really thinking. I put some sausage, bacon, muffins and bagels on a plate for Leah, Quil, and Embry. Embry had come inside and was sitting on the floor with them. I told them about the bonfire tonight and that they were all off duty until then. Seth was asleep, not sure if it was from the additional morphine that Carlisle gave him, exhaustion, or the pain causing him to pass out.

 

I ate quickly and then I saw Old Quil come back inside, he had a large black umbrella with him that he shook the water from and then leaned it by the door. He came and spoke to Dad and I followed him over to the kitchen table. They were ready to take Sam's body and so the three of us went out and Old Quil helped Dad get into his truck and I walked over to Emily and the guys that were with her.

“Em,” I knelt down on the ground next to her and she was curled into a ball with her head on Sam's chest, “they need to take him.”

I pulled lightly on her shoulders and at first she fought me, I wasn't going to force her to move even though I could have.

 

Then slowly she sat up so that she was on her knees, she kissed her own finger tips and then pressed her fingers to Sam's lips. Her hand lightly trailed down his shoulder and chest as she nodded her head. I looked quickly at Jared and Paul and together they picked up Sam and carried him to the truck and placed him inside a simple wooden box. Emily watched them and as the truck drove away, more sobs erupted from her, so I pulled her to my chest and let her cry. She was completely soaked and felt so cold as I wrapped my arms around her.

 

I heard Brady and Colin walk inside the house, leaving Emily and I alone. I wasn't sure how long we sat there, looking down the road where the truck had disappeared. Slowly I shifted Emily to my lap and was able to rock her gently and rubbed her back. Both of her arms were around my neck and her head rested on my shoulder as I felt her body relax and it seemed that she had worn herself out crying and fell asleep. I lifted her up and carried her inside. The moment I walked in everyone was completely silent. I wiped my feet on the mat and then carried Emily to her room, laying her down on top of the bed.

 

As I removed her from myself she started shivering and so I took off her soggy shoes and socks. “Hey, Leah,” I called quietly, but I knew she would hear me.

“Yes, Jake,” Leah answered as she came and stood next to me. She looked completely worn out, and I was sure that she needed to sleep.

“Do you mind changing Emily into dry clothes? And then try to get some rest, I'll look after Seth.”

“Alright, thanks.”

I placed my hand on her shoulder. “I'm here for you too, if you need it,” I told her.

She turned her sad eyes to me and nodded her head. “Not right now, but I'll let you know.”

 

I walked out and closed the bedroom door behind me and went to call Alice.

“Hey, Alice.” I could hear her breathing heavily.

“Jacob, I can't talk right now.”

“What is going on?” I asked panicked.

 

Author's Note: For a while the story will be divided between the Wolf Side and the Cullen Side of the story, the next chapter will be on the Cullen Side while they search for Bella. 

 

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:07pm

Author's Note: Try to remember that everything going on with the Cullens and the wolves are happening at the same time. In BS1, it served the story for you (the reader) to not know the specific details, I do not feel like that is true here. So I will be giving the details and going back and forth between the Cullens and Jacob. While this story will still be 90% written from Jacob's pov, when Jacob is not available I will write from another POV. For the Cullens, my only options are Alice or Edward and for some reason I prefer the male pov, so I hope that you can handle taking this journey with Edward.

Chapter 2 - SEARCHING

Song - John Mayer: Dreaming With a Broken Heart

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8b08b_vp80&feature=autoplay&...


Back in time to when the pack and Cullens are together where Bella, Alice and Seth were hiding.

EDWARD'S POV

Promise me, that you'll bring Bella back to me. Jacob said to me.
“I will, Jacob.” I promised.
ALIVE! he clarified. And truly alive, not a frozen over corpse that moves.
I cringed inside, because I didn't want Bella to become one of us any more than Jacob did, and I hoped desperately that I wouldn't be put in that situation, where I had to choose between changing her or her dying. “I'll do my best.” I answered.
Jacob looked at me for a moment and I saw in his mind that he understood that it was the only answer I could give.

Then I nodded to my family and we took off. The harsh winds made it difficult to follow Victoria's trail, but we knew to go towards Seattle because of Alice's visions. Alice seemed to think it was going to be a while before Victoria made a decision on what to do with Bella. Right now all she could see was Bella on Victoria's back, like she had volunteered to go. That was so Bella, of course she would be willing to trade herself as long as those she cared about didn't have to suffer.

As I ran I barely noticed when the surfaced changed from dirt and grass to pebbly sand as we came towards the water.
“Edward, wait!” Emmett called.
I came to a quick stop, ankle deep in the water. “What?” I asked.
“I just don't think it is a good idea for us all to be soaking wet while we are wondering around Seattle.” Rose tried to explain.
“Really, Rose? Are you that worried about your appearance?” I rolled my eyes, irritated that she actually thought that mattered.
“Of course she is not.” Emmett scowled at me.
“Are you really going to argue with me on something that Rose thinks?” I challenged. Emmett knew that I was most likely right, so he wisely kept quiet.

“Edward,” Jasper interrupted. “I don't care about getting wet, however I think it might be better if we can spread out in Seattle and cell phones tend not to do well in water.”
“Alright.” I tossed my phone to Jasper. “Once in Seattle, head downtown to the Jagged Nail and I'll find you.”
Everyone, but Esme, took off back towards our house for a car and clothing that would be more appropriate for blending into the crowds of Seattle.
Please, be careful Edward. Esme walked towards me, placing her hand on my shoulder. I could see in her mind that she was scared about what I might do if we were to loose Bella. She never recovered completely from my trip to Italy and now that Bella was not part of our family she lived in a constant fear that I would one day leave them.

I moved closer to her and my shoes squeaked from the water that filled them. My arms wrapped around her shoulders and I hugged her tightly. “I will, I promise.”
“Okay, I love you, Son.” She said as she reached up and kissed my cheek.
“I love you, too.” I smiled for a moment as my lips brushed across her forehead. “Do you want to come with me?” I could see in her mind that she did want to come, but was worried that I wouldn't appreciate her hovering.
Esme hugged me back tightly. “Yes, thank you.”

Together we ran back to the water until it quickly changed to swimming. I could feel the water as my legs kicked like a propeller from a boat, we soared underwater. It is times like these that it is nice to not have to breath and we were much stronger than the currents so they did not make a difference. There was a clear channel between here and Seattle that was easy to follow and as I emerged from the water I was surrounded by boats that lined the harbor. Most were personal boats, however some were large deep fishing boats that reeked of fish, and some were cruise ships that offered tourists either day cruises around the harbor or speed boats that would give families a quick ride. The only ones with people around them were the large cargo ships and it seems that the early morning crew has started. The sky was starting to awaken and there was not a cloud in the sky so I could easily tell that it was going to be sunny. That would make things more complicated, but certainly not impossible.

I pulled myself from the water and Esme did the same.
“It's so they will dry faster.” She explained, wringing the water from her clothes.
Sounded reasonable, so I wrung the water from my clothes, if I could find a place to run then they could air dry rather quickly. I started walking and Esme followed closely, even though I knew that I didn't need to be, it was just habit to feel protective of Esme.

Vampires really weren't all that different from humans in the way that they thought and tend to all be basically the same. What humans considered to be the “dangerous” part of town was usually because of high vampire activity, or at least the vampire could mingle in, take a few humans and it would just be blamed on drug or gang activity. So I planned to head in that direction to see what I could find, I thought it best to start with areas that I thought Victoria would be most familiar with and then branch out from there once the rest of my family arrived.

I could see the large buildings that surrounded the downtown area, and found a deserted area and ran quickly back and forth to dry my clothing, and Esme did the same. Once dry I started to walk the area listening to anyone that might be able to help me. There was a large alley with homeless people sleeping under cardboard boxes and drunks that had passed out against the dumpters. A few call girls tried to get my attention, I quickly checked their minds, wishing that I hadn't as it was clear that none here knew anything helpful.

We continued to walk along the harbor at a fast human pace, going faster when I knew no one was around. I wasn't really sure what I was hoping to find, the odds of someone happening to notice two females coming by would be a long shot, even though Victoria's hair was quite distinctive. If only Alice was with me then I could get some idea of what general area I was looking for. Until then I continued to search, listen, and smell, trying to find some trace of them.
Esme was doing the same, looking in every direction and her breathing was deep trying to smell anything that might be useful. “Where are we going? Anywhere in particular?” Esme asked.
“Mostly just checking along the ports first, before checking in with the others.” I answered.

The sun poured from the sky and it made me wish that I had something different than my dark blue jeans and charcoal t-shirt to cover my arms and neck. I felt confident that Alice would bring me something, at least Esme had on a thin long sleeve dark purple shirt and jeans. To avoid the sun I decided to head towards the Jagged Nail, it was a small sports bar in the nicer part of downtown that was open at all times. Inside the floor was a painted cement that looked like large marble squares framed by solid dark maple wood. There was a large bar with tall round stools and several tall square tables and chairs, everything was always very clean which gave the illusion of safety.

To humans this place was famous for the cheap food and largest beer selection in town, and for vampires it was popular because it was generally very dark. There was one small window and black paint covered the rest of the walls, with large modern murals giving some color. I saw Esme walking around looking at the pieces on the wall and even without reading her mind I would be able to tell that she thought they were spectacular. To me, it looked like a toddler got a hold of a paintbrush and I couldn't figure out why people considered it to be art.

I learned about this place from the weeks that I spent in Seattle looking for Victoria. She had made such a mess of the place, but most of the young vampires had no idea who Victoria was. There were rumors among them that Riley had a lover and that she was calling the shots and he would meet up with her here at the Jagged Nail. So that is where I went and I was surprised to find the bar tender, Elizabeth, was a vampire. Though she preferred to be called Lizzy because it made the humans feel more comfortable with her. I found that she was very friendly and I could sit at the bar and listen to the coming and going around me.

My eyes made her quite curious about me and I explained that I didn't drink from humans, which she found to be quiet interesting. She explained that she struggled at times with taking human life, but she did her best to focus on the gang bosses and drug lords that haunted the area. I found that I could relate easily, during my own time of rebellion I had done the same thing. For me it was much easier because I could read their minds and know, but the violence in town was common and she felt confident by taking out this one human, she would be saving the lives of countless others.

When Esme and I first arrived I saw Lizzy working at the bar. In the morning there typically wasn't much alcohol served, however it was still a very popular breakfast place. Their coffee was famous as well as their breakfast sandwiches and burritos. I made quick introductions between Esme and Lizzy and then Esme began to wonder around. Esme loved old buildings and so the downtown area was really fascinating to her. So while Esme enjoyed examining the artwork on the walls I walked over to the bar, where I saw Lizzy was pleasantly surprised to see me.
“Hello, Edward, it has been a day or so. Where did you go?” She smiled.
I hadn't realized that I was becoming so predictable, however I was bored out of my mind when I first came to Seattle and so I came here often. “I needed to go home, emergency situation came up.” I shrugged. “Honestly, I didn't think you would notice.”
“Bartenders are suppose to notice these things.” She answered easily.

We continued to chat easily as she served different customers that came in on their way to work. I couldn't help but notice Esme's thoughts, she was so excited that I was speaking to a girl. I took an unnecessary deep breath, I wasn't sure what I was going to do with her. I loved Esme like a mother or sister, but the way that she worried about me all the time was sometimes annoying. In an attempt to give Lizzy and I 'privacy' Esme continued to look at the already memorized art.

I excused myself and walked over to Esme, and placed my hand on her shoulder. “You know, you really shouldn't worry quite so much. I'm fine.”
“Edward, there was a time when I saw you 'fine', and believe me you are far from it.” She challenged. She walked over and sat down at one of the small tables, even with no one else but a fellow vampire, pretending to be human was just too habitual for us by now.
So I followed her and sat next to her. “Okay, maybe not completely fine. But I don't need you playing match maker with any girl that I happen to talk to.”
“I'm sorry, you know I can't help it. I just want to see you happy again.”
“I know you do.”

Esme placed her hand over my own. There might be someone else, you know. She thought, too scared to say it out loud.
“No, there is not.”
“I'm not saying right now, but it is possible to love again.”
“Could you? If something were to happen to Carlisle?” I looked into her mind and I could see the pain that my question caused and almost felt guilty for it, but I really did want her answer.
“I hope so, and I hope that Carlisle would find love again if something were to happen to me. Don't you think Bella would want that for you?”
“Yeah, I think she would want that, easier said than done. I can't think about that right now. Maybe when I bring her back to Jacob and I see them living the life that I want for her to live.”
“I'm so sorry, Edward.” I wish that she were still ours.
“Don't say that, that is not an option.”

“What if Victoria changes her?” Esme asked.
“Then it would be my greatest failure of all.” I shook my head in disgust. “I can't believe that it has gotten this far and Victoria was able to even touch Bella. I hate myself for not protecting Bella enough.” I clinched my fists in both frustration and anger.
“Edward, no. She wasn't yours to protect.”
“That is not true. I introduced her to our world, therefore she'll always be mine to protect, she just isn't mine to hold.”
Maybe, someday she will be. Esme took a deep breath. I was done arguing with Esme about Bella, I knew that there was nothing more that I could say. I got up and went to talk to Lizzy, just to give me something to do.

It was a while later that Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rose showed up and I changed into the clothes that Alice had brought for me so that we would be able to walk out despite the sun shinning bright. Alice was getting some wicked visions, the problem was that I couldn't tell where Victoria and Bella were. All I could see was a hard wood floor and Bella was sitting in a tight ball. She looked to be wet and cold, it seemed that there was a small lamp or possibly a candle giving light to the room. Victoria seemed to be extremely curious about Bella. She asked her about how she met me, what she thought of my family, of the wolves, what she thought of herself, and I could see Bella answering slowly and sometimes cautiously. Victoria would slap her face when she either didn't like an answer or she felt like Bella took too long to answer, slowly Bella's skin began to bruise more and more.

I could feel the hatred deep inside boil as I watched the pain that Bella endured.
“Easy Edward,” Jasper cautioned, as he began to do his best to calm me back down, “we need to be smart about this.”
“Right.” I shook my head to try and get Alice's vision out for a moment, however I didn't want to be away from her. Alice was my only link to Bella and I knew that even the most minor flash could be extremely important in finding Bella. “From Alice we can see that Bella is wet and cold, so I think it is safe to assume that Victoria swam here. I would like Emmett and Rose to head north and Jasper and Esme to head south from here along the harbor.” I looked at Jasper to see if he had any problem with Alice being with me, and his thoughts seemed fine. “Alice and I will go first to the homes here in Seattle that once belonged to the newborn families that Victoria created. It is possible that she is using one of their houses to hide in.”

We separated and Alice and I went quickly to the three houses here in town. They were far from each other so we took Rose's BMW that they drove down here. I drove while Alice concentrated on Bella and Victoria to see if she could get any more clues. Once Victoria was finished interrogating and beating Bella she left her. Bella walked around the room, tried to open the locked door, and then curled back on the floor. I wasn't sure if she got any sleep at all the night before the fight, she looked so tired and helpless, and she ended up falling asleep. Alice then focused on Victoria and found her sucking the life of a man, however I wasn't sure if he was just at the wrong place at the wrong time or if she was filling up for a purpose.

“Alice was there anything that I missed while you all were coming down here?” I asked.
“Not really, Jacob has called but I didn't have anything to tell him. It was almost like Victoria just came across this place by accident. I didn't see any place in her mind until suddenly she was just there.” She showed me the place, in the vision it was still dark outside, but I could tell that it was a white house or building with a dark green door. I immediately could cross out two of the houses, one was bright blue and the other was a sage green, and because Victoria didn't actually decide on a place until last minute I really doubted that she was in the other home. It was deep in the heart of Seattle and I couldn't see her just bumping into it on accident.

The difficulty of Alice's visions are to filter through all the sick and twisted things that Victoria thinks about doing and the things that she actually does. Suddenly Alice gasped, and threw her hands over each side of her head, like she wanted it to stop. Alice's clearest visions are those that are actually happening, and she could see Bella still laying down on the cold floor. She was on her side, laying on her arm and her other arm looked like it had been curled into her chest, but now rested on the hard ground. Victoria ran her finger over the scar left by James, gently she picked up Bella's hand, and caressed her thumb over the rippled edge of the scar, and brought her lips down kissing the edge.
“I hate that your flesh was the last thing his lips were on.” Victoria hissed to no one. “I hate you, I hate you. I hate you,” she continued to mumble over and over.
I wasn't completely sure if she was talking to Bella or to James for leaving her in pursuit of Bella.

Suddenly, Victoria's teeth sunk into the same mark that James had left and Bella began to scream and squirm. The noise didn't phase Victoria at all as she pulled her teeth out, licking it to seal the wound and bit her again.
“Noooo!” I screamed as Victoria continued over and over in Alice's mind.
“Make it stop!” Alice wailed, her knees were brought up to chest, as she rocked in her seat.
I have never gotten into a car accident in my life, but I have also never had such a murderous rage rush over me in the middle of traffic, so I took the next exit and pulled over as quickly as I could.
“Alice, please.” I yelled, shaking her shoulders. “Where is she?”
“I don't know.” Every part of Alice's body was shaking in her own torment from the images filling her head. Bella continued to plead and scream as she tried to push Victoria away from her, but Bella was only hurting herself as she kicked and hit. Victoria would hiss and snarl as she continued the cycle of licking and biting.

As the torment continued, desperate to see anything else I began to look around the room and I could see the slight shadow of a window and I could see the angle of light that was from the sun. It wasn't a bright sun, possibly covered by clouds and then I heard a clap of thunder and pounding of rain against the building.
“Alice, is this happening right now?”
“As best as I can tell, yes. It is either right now or about to, her decision is so clear that nothing will change her mind, so I can't tell if that is because she is actually doing it or just that determined.”
I pulled out my cell phone and brought up the weather radar. It was clear skies in all of Seattle.
“Alice, she is not in Seattle.”

I felt confident that she was still in this general area and zoomed the weather radar out to look for thunderstorms and found that it really wasn't helpful. There was a massive thunderstorm coming down from Vancouver as far east as La Push and west of Everett, it looked to be in Seattle probably in about an hour.

Alice was still curled up with her head resting on her knees. Victoria was still torturing Bella until she sunk her teeth into her wrist again and began to suck.
Suddenly, Alice's cell phone range and she answered without looking at the phone. “Hello?” Her eyes were still glazed watching the images in her head rather than paying attention.
“Hey, Alice.” I heard Jacob through the phone.
Her breathing increased as she tried to stay focused on Bella. “Jacob, I can't talk right now,” she told him.
“What is going on?” He asked panicked.

Victoria was still sucking on Bella's arm as I took the phone from Alice and decided that I would talk to him. “Jacob, it's Edward, Bella is not in Seattle, but I'm not sure where she is.”
“Edward, I'm trusting you.”
I knew how hard it was for him to do that and I really did appreciate his trust. “Thank you, and I am doing everything I can to keep my promise to you.”
“So, Bella's alive.” Jacob stated. I didn't know what to say. I could lie to him and tell him that everything was fine, that Victoria was just holding Bella captive, or I could tell him the truth that Victoria has bit her several times and was now sucking on her. Before I could decide Alice got another vision of Bella laying on her side with her bandaged wrist to her chest. For whatever reason Victoria sucked her own venom back out. “Edward?”
“Yes, Jacob she is alive.”
I heard him take a deep breath. “Okay, good,” Jacob sighed.

“Are you doing alright, Jacob?”
“I've been better. I have never felt more torn between my pack and Bella. I wish that I could be in two places at once.”
“I know what you mean. I wish that I knew where she was.”
“Believe me, I am beyond thrilled that Bella is alive, but I don't get it. Why is she keeping her alive?” Jacob asked.
“To torture her. She feels that Bella is responsible for James being killed. If James hadn't started tracking her, and if I hadn't challenged James making it even more of an obsession for him then she feels like James would not have been destroyed.” I explained.

“What is she doing to Bella?” I could hear the resistance in his voice and it was very difficult for him to ask, so I knew that he wanted the truth.
“She has physically beaten her, other than Bella being bruised I don't know if she has any broken bones, I can't tell.” I could hear Jacob growling through the phone. “And she has bit her . . .”
“WHAT?” Jacob interrupted. “What part of completely alive don't you understand?” Jacob yelled.
“Calm down, she sucked her own venom back out, so Bella isn't being changed. She is just using the venom's burning feeling as a means of torturing her.”

Once again I could hear him growling and take several deep breathes. “I know, it is horrible. Jacob, you may not believe me, but I do not want her to be changed. I never have.”
“Yeah, I know.” I could hear someone moaning in the back ground. “Look, Seth is awake, I need to go.”
“I'll try to keep you as updated as I can.”
“Thanks, I'll probably be at Emily's place, so call me here.”
“Alright, and if appropriate please give her our condolences.”
“Okay will do, bye.”
“Bye.”

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:08pm

Chapter 3 – CHIEF

 

Song: Josh Gracin – It Could Have Been Me

- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibnFNjS79UU&feature=related

(I'm sorry to those who are able to see youtube, I do not think he ever recorded and released the song so it might be hard to find)

 

JACOB'S POV

 

 

Talking to Edward was never very easy, but it was even harder feeling so helpless. I hated having to trust him and there wasn't anything I could do about it. However, he really was as helpless as myself, and was still desperately searching for Bella. I couldn't believe that Victoria had bitten Bella, but it was such a relief to know that she had sucked the venom back out. I hated so much that she was hurting Bella like this.

 

When I finished talking to Edward, I walked over to Seth, who was still laying on the floor. Embry was sleeping on the ground with his back pressed against Seth's, and Quil was also asleep on the floor with this back against the couch, his head was against one of the cushions on the end of the couch with one hand resting on Seth's leg. Seth turned his head and looked at me as I came and sat down next to him.

“How are you feeling?” I asked.

“A little stoned, but at least I don't hurt right now.”

“Well that is good, maybe you are healing.”

“I think my shoulder is certainly better.” He shifted both shoulders on the floor and winced slightly.

“There is no rush, but I am glad that you are doing better.”

“Have you heard from the Cullens?” Seth asked.

“Yeah, but there is not much to tell. Bella is alive, but they don't know where she is.”

“I really am sorry.”

“I know you are, there isn't anything you could have done differently.” I reassured him.

 

I could see some of the muscles in Seth's back spasm and twitch and he began to moan.

“Can I get you anything?” I asked. Seth shook his head. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

I got up and went to the kitchen, got him two sandwiches, and came and sat back with him. He ate quietly and then drifted back asleep. I rested my head against the side of the couch and listened to all the sounds around me. I could hear the steady breathing of Leah and Emily, coming from Emily's bedroom. I was glad that they were able to get some rest. I was going to owe Leah big for being with Emily, and I wondered if she was doing okay. I knew how close Emily and Leah used to be and it seemed that they were settling back into that same bond. Embry, Quil, and Seth were still sound asleep and I guessed that Sue left with Dad and Old Quil. I knew that there was still a long and difficult day ahead of me so I decided to get some sleep while I could.

 

I woke up to the sound of the front door opening and it was Jared, Kim, and Paul, walking into the house. I stretched and acknowledged them. They had both gone to Jared's house to crash for a while and came back here for food. They seemed calm, but I could tell that Sam's death was very difficult on them, even though we were all a family they were both closest to Sam. He had helped them adjust to this crazy new world.

 

Quil and Embry stirred and stretched as well. “Hey guys.” I addressed them and they looked at me, I could see in their eyes that I wasn't just their best friend, there was something new and different. There was authority and respect given to me as their alpha. “Go ahead and eat, then I want you both to do some patrolling. I honestly think it is over, but I wouldn't put it past Victoria to have something else planned for when we think it is over.”

“Sure, sure.” They both said and we laughed, it felt strange to laugh, but good at the same time. They made themselves some sandwiches and then headed out.

 

As I was heading to the kitchen, I could hear crying from Emily's room and knew that both girls were awake. I asked Jared to keep an eye on Seth and then I lightly tapped on Emily's door before opening it. They were both on the bed, Emily was under the blankets and Leah was on top and their arms were around each other. I came and knelt down on the side next to Emily.

“Can I get you anything?” I asked.

“No,” Emily whispered.

“She has a killer headache, can you get her something.” Emily scowled at Leah like it was some secret that she wasn't suppose to share. “What? You do.” Leah defended.

“My head is the least of my concerns.” Emily reasoned.

“Where is your pain meds?” I asked. Emily gave me the directions and Leah helped me know what to give her and then went to the kitchen. I came back with a couple pills and some water for her to drink.

 

Emily sat up and brought her legs to the side of the bed and I sat down next to her. “You need to eat.” I told Emily and she shook her head. I placed my hand over her stomach. “You need to eat.”

She placed her hand over mine. “I know, but Jacob . . .” I could feel her muscles tighten as her shoulders began to shake.

“Come here.” I offered, as I wrapped my arms around her. Her arms we so weak as she draped them behind my back, it made me wish that she wasn't in such pain. There wasn't anything that I could say so I just held her silently as she cried, until she slowly stopped.

 

“Okay, I'm ready.” Emily whispered.

“Alright.” I grabbed her hand and we walked out. Leah was sitting at the table with Jared, Kim, and Paul eating a sandwich. Emily picked up a slice of bread and some ham placing them on a plate and sat down at the table. I made myself a quick lunch and joined them.

Colin and Brady walked into the room, they had both rested and eaten so I had them trade with Embry and Quil out on patrols.

 

From Emily's I walked over to the beach where we would have the bonfire tonight. It was going to be a large gathering so I knew that we would need a large circle. The ground was very wet from all the rain that we got today and I used my hands to dig down a little in the pebbly sand for a drier area to build the fire. I found several drift wood branches and arranged them for lighting later.

 

“Hey Jake,” Quil called, walking towards me followed by Embry.

“Hey,” I acknowledged. “Was there anything on patrols?

“Nah,” Quil answered. “However, your dad wanted some of the ashes from the leeches that we burned.”

“Okay, that's weird.” I replied.

“We wanted to know what to do with it.” Embry added.

“You got me, I have no idea.” I shrugged and Embry sat down a dark leather pouch. “When did he talk to you?”

“He called over at Emily's and Paul phased and asked us to bring it. Brady got the bag from Old Quil and then brought it to us.”

“Then why don't you take it over to Old Quil.” I suggested.

“Alright, I'll take it” Quil offered, picking up the bag he jogged off towards his grandfather's place.

 

“You doing alright, Jake?” Embry asked.

I just shrugged. “Is any of us alright?” I asked back.

“I guess not,” he confirmed. “But I'm not stupid enough to think that it is the same for me as it is for you.”

“He was just as much your alpha as he was mine.” I countered.

“Yeah, but you know it is not the same. And you throw Bella in the mix and I don't know how you are holding it together.”

“Falling apart isn't an option right now.” I answered. “Maybe when it is, I'll completely lose it or something, but I can't right now.”

He came over and stood next to me. “Just like you are here for us, we are here for you. And if anyone deserves to 'lose it' it is you.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that.”

 

We were both quiet for a moment, as we continued to gather wood and made a large stack next to the fire pit. “Do I need to say anything to the pack about being alpha?” I asked.

“Like what?” Embry asked.

“I don't know, ask everyone if they want me to be alpha.”

Embry shook his head. “Jake, you were already Sam's beta, even if you weren't 'suppose' to be alpha, you would be now.”

“That is true.”

“Everyone knows that. Did you think someone would fight you for it?” Embry asked.

“No one specific, I just wasn't sure that I should just assume that the responsibility would be mine.”

“Jake, you have enough to worry about without adding this to it. You are alpha.”

 

It was good to have Embry's confirmation to something that I already knew. Despite being my best friend I knew that he would be honest with me and tell me what he really thought. After all the wood was gathered for the bonfire Embry took off to Quil's house and I went to my own.

 

When I walked in the door, Rachel was sitting on the couch completely lost in thought with a dazed look on her face.

“Rach, you alright?”

“Yeah,” she answered sadly, “just thinking of Sam. You know we went to high school together, I can't believe he died.”

“I know, it was really unexpected.” I came and sat next to her on the couch.

“How did you and Sam become friends?” Rachel asked.

“Well it's a long, complicated story, and we just got in the same circle. He was always looking out for the tribe, protecting us.”

“It sounds like you looked up to him a lot.”

“I did, he taught me a lot, probably more than I can say.”

 

We settled into a comfortable silence for a little bit each of us in our own thoughts. It was weird having to be so vague about how I knew Sam.

“Are you going to the funeral?” I asked her.

“For a little bit.” Rachel looked down at the ground and I knew why she wouldn't be there for long. She probably wouldn't go at all, but her friends here would all be going and she knew that it would seem rude.

“I understand.” I put my arm across her shoulders.

“How do you do it, Jake? Stay in this house all the time. Don't you feel like she is everywhere and nowhere all at the same time?”

“I guess, I don't remember her well and what I do remember I want to hold on to.”

“That makes sense.” We gave each other a sad smile and then I heard Dad rolling up the ramp.

 

We had a quiet dinner and my mind was a garbled mess between trying to think of anything I needed to do for the funeral, even though Dad told me that he would help me and already explained everything that would be happening. I was worried about Emily, but he told me that Sue and Leah were with her and Jared and Paul were taking care of Seth. Then there was Bella, I wanted her here with me, to have her eyes to look into and her body to hold. I passed my room and I could smell her scent so powerful. It was perfection and my own form of torture at the exact same time. I couldn't stay away as I sat down on my bed and curled her pillow to my chest. I wanted it to be her, and I hated that I couldn't be the one to bring her home.

 

I wasn't sure how long I laid there before I heard Dad's voice. “Hey Jake,” he spoke softly from the entry of my room.

I lifted my head looked at him as I sat up in bed. “Yes?”

“It's time.” I heard him back out and roll to his room and I got up and followed him there. I helped him get dressed in dark pants, a cream long sleeve shirt with a vest over it that had intricate tribal lettering, two large wolves covered each breast, and eagle feathers lined his shoulders and waist. Then I got myself dressed, Old Quil brought clothing out to each of the wolves. When Victoria first started coming around, the council knew that something like this could happen and had clothing made for each of us. We each had a light wool shirt that was sleeveless, each shirt was dyed to match the wolf so mine was a russet brown color with black and white feathers across the shoulders. On each breast there was a wolf and they were facing each other howling up into the sky. I had loose leather pants and would be barefoot.

 

I got Dad's headdress from the closet and braided his hair getting ready to attach it to his head. This was the only part of funerals I was familiar with. Dad attended all tribal funerals and I always helped him get ready for them.

“Wait a minute, Jake.” The headdress was long with several feathers and I figured that he wanted to wait to have it attached until he was ready to leave. “Follow me,” he rolled over to his closet and pointed to a cedar box on the bottom right side. “Hand me that.” I lifted the box and sat it on his lap, he lifted the lid and brought out a wooden wolf's head. It had carved ears, eyes, and nose, it was so detailed that it almost looked real. The wood appeared to be very old and was dark with age. He rolled to the headdress that was laying across his bed and attached it to the crown of the headdress.

“Why have you never worn this before?” I asked.

“Because I'm not a wolf, and I'm not the one who will be wearing it.”

 

He looked directly at me and I was stunned silent for a moment. “Dad, no. I can't.”

“Jacob, this headdress is for chief. I've held on to it knowing that I would pass it on to you or your son one day.”

“I'm not ready for that.”

“I know Son. Honestly, Sam wasn't ready either.”

“He always seemed so sure of his decisions.” I murmured softly.

“That is how your pack will see you too.”

“I hope so.”

“Don't hope, Son, make it so.”

 

I just nodded and tried to swallow the lump that was in my throat. I had no idea how I was going to get through this, just when I was starting to get used to the idea that I was alpha, I was also chief. I could feel the weight on my shoulders and it seemed so heavy. Dad rolled towards me and took my hands and I knelt down to be closer to eye level with him.

“It's okay to be scared, Jake. Just don't live in fear. Fear can hold you prisoner and keep you from being the man that I know you are.” I nodded my head. “It is also okay to cry,” he added. With that I crumbled with my head resting in his lap and cried. My body shook and I held on tightly to my dad, I could feel that it was cleansing. I was trying to be so strong for everyone else that if felt good to let my father be the support for me. He rested a heavy hand on my shoulder and with the other ran his fingers through my hair.

 

It was a few minutes that I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes. “Thanks, Dad.”

“That is part of me being here for you.” He gave me a big hug and then I heard the phone ringing so I walked to the kitchen and answered.

“Hey, Jake.” Charlie said.

“Oh, Charlie.” Crap, I hadn't even thought of what I would need to tell him.

“I heard about Sam and wanted to know if you all needed anything.”

“Thanks for calling, but we are good.”

“I assume that Bella is going to stay with you all for the weekend.” Charlie stated easily.

 

I was racking my brain trying to think of what the best response would be. Charlie wasn't going to be there, but would he hear eventually that Bella wasn't at the funeral? I already knew that Victoria had beaten Bella, so I knew that she wasn't coming back without at least some bruises.

“Did you hear me, Jake?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah, yeah, um. Actually, Bella is with the Cullens. Alice kidnapped her for the weekend.”

Charlie chuckled. “You know Alice, I think she could get Bella to do almost anything.”

“Yeah, she is something else.” I tried to make my voice light so not to worry Charlie.

“Well, I won't keep you Jake. I'm sure that you and Billy have your hands full.”

“Thanks, Charlie. I'll talk to you all later.”

“Bye.”

 

While I had the phone I called over to Emily's to see how things were going over there. It was not going well with Seth being in a lot of pain and Emily's crying and so I knew I needed to go there. I traded out the patrols again and then Dad, Rachel and I went over to Emily's.

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:11pm

Author's Note: Originally this was going to be two chapters, but I felt like they were too short. So this will have both Cullen story and Wolf story, I'm sure there is no problem with that (wink, wink). So because of that this chapter sort of has 2 titles and 2 songs. The next chapter will be back to the Cullens again and will be posted in one week.

Song: Trading Yesterday – Love Song Requiem

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tnVMKgpNUE&feature=autoplay&...

Chapter 4 – DECISIONS, DECSIONS and THE SUN SETS


EDWARD'S POV – DECISIONS, DECISIONS


(Phone call, with Jacob)
Once again I could hear him growling and him taking several deep breathes. “I know, it is horrible. Jacob, you may not believe me, but I do not want her to be changed. I never have.”
“Yeah, I know.” I could hear someone moaning in the back ground. “Look, Seth is awake, I need to go.”
“I'll try to keep you as updated as I can.”
“Thanks, I'll probably be at Emily's place, so call me here.”
“Alright, and if appropriate please give her our condolences.”
“Okay will do, bye.”
“Bye.”

I hung up with Jacob and drove back towards the Jagged Nail as Alice called the rest of the family to have them gathered until we decide where we wanted to check next. As much as I hated seeing and hearing the torture that Bella was enduring, I kept thinking about Alice's visions, trying to see if there was anything at all that could help figure out where she was located. I parked the car and found the rest of my family waiting for us in the parking lot.

As always Jasper was thinking of every strategic advantage and possibility that we could use in finding Bella. Emmett was excited about the possibility of finding Victoria, and tried not to think about what might be happening to Bella. As long as Victoria didn't kill Bella, he didn't mind if she was changed. He enjoyed his vampire life and didn't understand why Rose or I had a problem with it. Esme was such a mix of emotions from being concerned about Bella and being worried about me, that I skipped over her. Rosalie surprised me, she was actually really worried about Bella. She knew what it was like for her last human memories to be horrible and as much as she didn't want Bella to be changed, she didn't want Bella to endure anything even close to what she experienced.

“Thank you all for coming back so quickly.” I acknowledged as Alice and I approached them.
“Of course, Edward.” Esme smiled.
I shared with them what Alice had seen so far and explained that it has been determined that Bella was not here and was most likely either up north into Canada or another random place. We were standing in the parking lot behind the building and suddenly from inside I heard some familiar voices.
“Why are we here?” A male vampire complained.
“Because she is the best source for information,” hissed a female.
“Let's get this over with.” A different male added, like he was already bored.

I heard them open the front door and could see their thoughts as they looked around the place forLizzy.
“Please, have a seat and I'll be with you in a moment.” Lizzy said, hidden from the back room.
“Hello Elizabeth,” the female said.
“Oh!” Lizzy said and I could hear the panic in her thoughts. What have I done? Why are they here? Maybe it is nothing, they are just passing through. “Welcome!” Lizzy greeted. “What do I owe the honor?”
“There have been some intense vampire activity in the area, and we wanted to know if you knew anything?” The serious male inquired.
“I know that there was a vampire named Victoria that was in question for making some newborns, but I never knew why.” Lizzy answered. “I haven't seen any of them in a while.”
“Sister, I think that we were too late,” one of the males reasoned.
“It seems so. You know the trip does not have to be completely wasted, we can go check and maybe there will be a different newborn in the area.”

There were some human customers and I could feel Lizzy's concern over her human visitors. As soon as she finished serving them, she went back to them. “You are welcome to stay as long as you like, I just ask that you please not feed in this direct area. I do have blood available, if desired.”
“That will not be necessary. Thank you for your time, but we will be going now.”

Alice gasped, “We have to stop them.” I looked into Alice's mind and she saw their long black robes trailing through the trees as they searched for us, then they suddenly disappeared. I assumed that they came across the wolves, and the next vision was of them talking to Caius and a massive Volturi army was gathering, in order to come after them.
“They can't know about the wolves.” I said. Quickly, I pointed at Esme, Emmett and Rose, “I need you all to head north into Canada, stay near the shoreline, we are pretty confident that wherever she brought Bella it was a last minute decision. After we deal with them we will head back towards La Push following the coast.”
“Okay, please be careful, Edward.” Esme kissed my forehead and I gave her a quick hug and then they took off.

I turned and walked quickly around to the front of the Jagged Nail, while Alice and Jasper stayed right behind me. As we walked in Alice started laughing like she had heard a funny joke and Jasper and I smiled at each other. It was clear that Alice was trying to make it look like we just accidentally ran into them here and I thought it was a good idea.
“The way that girl just trips over air, it is the funniest thing I have ever seen.” Alice continued.
“Hey, that's my girl that you are making fun of.” I scolded.
“Only because I love her.” Alice brought her arm around my waist and stuck her tongue at me. I continued to scowl at her, as I turned around and spotted Jane, Alec, and Demetri over in the dark corner of the bar.

“Hello,” I nodded my head at them and Alice and Jasper went and sat down at the bar speaking to Lizzy. “You seem to be a long ways from your home.” I walked over to them.
“Yes, we had some business to take care of here.” Demetri confirmed.
“How interesting that you happen to be by when we have just decided to visit.” Jane commented and looked intensely at Alice.
“That is interesting, we have been spending the day in Seattle.” I commented.
“Where is your Bella?” Jane asked.
“She is with Esme and Rosalie shopping.” I answered.

“I take it that she is still human.” Alec stated. “There are not very many vampires that trip over air.”
“You are correct.” I confirmed.
“But do not worry, a date has been set.” Alice confirmed, as she fluttered to my side.
“Why the delay?” Demetri asked.
“What's the hurry? Her family all know that we are together, she can't just disappear. We felt it would be better for her to go to college and start a career. Then it would make more sense to her family why she stops coming home for visits.” I answered.
“Sounds reasonable.” Alec nodded to his sister.

“You know we will be checking on this, and we do not give second chances.” Demetri reminded us.
I turned and looked at Jane. “Wouldn't you prefer it if Aro happened to forget about Bella? She must have a pretty impressive gift if she is able to defy him while she is human. Imagine the possibilities she would have as a vampire.” I challenged, knowing that Jane hated the possibility of Aro coming across a vampire that he deemed more valuable to him than her.
“Umm, decisions, decisions.” She stated calmly.
Alec simply took her hand. “A decision that is not ours to make.” He turned and looked at us. “We will be going.”

I watched them walk out, I could hear that Demetri was irritated that it seems that they came all this way for nothing. Alec could see that his sister was upset and didn't like it. Jane was determined to try and have it that Bella was never mentioned again and would do her best to deter Aro from ever searching for her. She didn't care if Bella became a vampire or not, as long as Aro never found out about it.
“I sure hope you did the right thing confirming that Bella was human.” Jasper said cautiously.
“I think I did.” I confirmed cautiously. “Oddly enough, Jane might become our biggest ally, she just doesn't know it.”
“I think you are right.” Alice added. “They are all heading straight back, and I do not see any of them mentioning Bella to Aro. Aro seems to appreciate the caution that we are taking in keeping the secret from Bella's family.”
“Great, now we just need to find her.” Jasper said.
“Yes, let's go.”

By now the work day was over and people were leaving the area so it made us running around much easier. However we were still careful and I would continue to listen for anyone who might be watching us before we darted from place to place. We continued south around the harbor and then slowly back north along the other side across from the Seattle area. The further that we got away from town the thicker the tree coverage became and we were able to run faster and faster.

As we ran Alice continued to look into Bella's and Victoria's future trying to find anything. Right now Bella was still passed out from when Victoria sucked her venom out, she probably sucked out more blood than she should have and Bella would probably look pale if she weren't so bruised and swollen. Then Alice looked for Victoria and we could see her sitting in the same room as Bella. She looked out and we could see mostly water with the waves lapping at the shore below and two large boats out in the distance. It seems that they were high and the shoreline seemed to be low.

She spoke softly to the quiet room while she tried to decide what she wanted to do, for so long she dreamed of killing Bella that it surprised her that now that she had the opportunity she was doubting. Alice could see her wondering if I could really love her, if I allowed her to be with Jacob. It hurt to think that someone could doubt my love for Bella, but if it helped to keep her alive then it was okay. I could deal, there was nothing more important than getting to her. I wanted her to live and to have the life that we were all suppose to have.

Victoria looked out again and I could see two buildings below one much larger than the other they were both white with green shutters and there was a large flag limp from the heavy rain. A large gust of wind shook the flag and I knew I had seen it before.
“I know where Bella is.”


* * * * *
SONG – Amazing Grace in Cherokee

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvYIjFtPQEk&playnext=1&list=...

** Tissue warning - You are going to need it!! 

JACOB'S POV - THE SUN SETS

We pulled up to the house and Seth sounded horrible in there, I got Dad on his chair and Rachel helped push him to the ramp where he could push himself. Inside, Seth was screaming on the floor, he was on his back and Leah was trying to comfort him. I looked around the room, Sue was with Emily and some of her family who came in for the funeral, they were talking quietly at the table. Emily's eyes were very red and I could tell that she had been crying, which wasn't surprising. Embry, Colin and Brady were both dressed and also at the table, there was some pulled pork in the crock pot and the guys had large sandwiches and chips.

I crouched down on the floor next to Seth and placed my hand on his shoulder. “When was the last time he had pain meds?” I asked, not sure if Leah or Seth would answer.
“Not any since you left.” Leah answered.
“I'll call Carlisle.”
“Jake.” Seth put his hand over mine to keep me from leaving.
“What, buddy?”
“I want to go to the funeral. I don't want him to knock me out.” Seth said through clinched teeth.
“I'll tell him.” I went to the phone and called Carlisle, he said that he would be right over.

I came back and placed my hand on Leah's back and whispered to her. “How is he doing?”
She turned her head to whisper back. “It's bittersweet. He has feeling in his legs, thank God, but with each nerve that is repaired he also feels much more of the pain.”
I gave her shoulder a quick squeeze. “I'm glad he is better, the pain has got to be easier to deal with than the possibility of him being paralyzed.”
“It is, but still sucks.”
“You both know that I can hear you, right?” Seth rolled his eyes.
Leah rolled her eyes back at Seth, and then smiled at me. It was good to have Seth almost back to his usual self.

Seth wanted to at least be able to sit up and be comfortable for the funeral. So when Carlisle came to give him the morphine he gave him about half the usual dosage and left us with some more for Sue to give him later tonight. While Carlisle was here, Edward called, I tried not to be angry that he called Carlisle before trying to reach me, but that was quickly forgotten when I could tell that he knew where Bella was hostage. The momentary anger melted into nervousness when I realized that for them to need Carlisle it was very serious for Bella. I wanted to call for more specific information, but I didn't want to risk slowing him down and Dad acknowledged that it was time to go.

“Jacob,” my dad called to me and I followed him over on the other side of the couch. He nodded his head and I knelt down in front of him and everyone was silent as they watched. He took the headdress and I could feel the feathers down my back as he secured the band around my head. I lifted my eyes to his and he swallowed thickly before he placed one hand on each of my shoulders.
As he spoke his voice was strong, and I was in awe that this powerful man was my father. “When you are in doubt, be still, and wait; when doubt no longer exists for you, then go forward with courage. So long as the mist envelops you, be still; be still until the sunlight pours through and dispels the mists – as it surely will. Then act with courage.”

I had never been more speechless in my life, the last time I had heard those words were from my mother and she used to say them to me when she tucked me into bed at night. Dad would be there as well standing in the door way of my room, but I always thought of it as her blessing. I remembered wanting to wake up the next day and do whatever I could to make her proud. Before drifting off to sleep I would always whisper my promised acknowledgement.
“Yes, father, I will.” I whispered.
“I know.” His eyes glistened with tears that he wouldn't let fall, and I stood up and felt stronger, more confident.

I looked around the room and I could see the silent tears of my sister mixed with her pride. Dad rolled himself to the car, he wanted to meet with the whole pack once we were together at the beach. I carried Seth to the car and then called Quil to meet them there to help Dad and Seth get in place. Rachel drove them down to the beach and Emily's family followed her.

I walked over to Emily and offered her my hand to walk with her over to the bonfire. She was in a straight black skirt and a similar wool shirt that we wore, it was black with white paint outlining the shape of the wolves on each side. It was big on her and I quickly realized that it would have been Sam's if he were here to wear it. As we stepped off the front porch Paul and Jared came in, still in wolf form, Emily came to them and even though they looked nothing like Sam it was like his wolf was here. They followed us as far as they could and then phased back and were given clothing for them to wear.

As we approached we saw the fire's glow and the last rays of the sun glistened across the water. There was a wooden box that was painted white with black designs. There was a sun and moon, an eagle with its wings spread in flight, a man, woman, and baby, a fire with the smoke lifting up into the sky and a pack of ten small wolves. I could smell the fresh paint and something else. I got closer and realized that the black ink was not only ink, but had the vampire's ashes mixed in, giving it a grainy texture. There was a wooden bench next to the casket for Emily and someone would sit with her.
“Can I have a minute alone?” Emily asked.
“Of course.” I left her and she sat down next to the box and rested both hands on the top. She was speaking softly, I could have heard her, but I felt like it was private and I shouldn't listen.

Surrounded by the fire there were several logs, laying as benches and several chairs around the benches in two large circles. The goal was to have it give unity to the ones grieving. I saw Seth sitting in one of the chairs at the back and made sure that he was comfortable, and he was but I could tell that he was a little loopy. Then it was time to join the rest of the pack who were all off to the side.

I walked over to them, and we were a somber group and I could see the red eyes of those who have spent the day in quiet memory of their friend and leader. There was no shame in crying, but we tended to hold back when together because if one started we all would.
“The sun is setting and so everyone who plans to come will be gathering. Once it was completely dark we will start.” Old Quil explained.
“Start what, exactly?” Brady asked.
“The dance.” Old Quil answered.
“What dance?” I asked.
Dad smiled as he saw all of our confused looks. “You didn't think that we made you all dance every year just to work on your coordination skills. It is called 'Cry of the Wolf' and we never knew if it was ever going to be used, but we never wanted it to be forgotten.”

It was a simple dance with only two drums that Dad and Old Quil were going to play. We all knew it by heart and outside of being nervous about performing it in front of others there was no other reason to be concerned. I knew that I could do this in my sleep if I had to. We spoke softly to each other filling each other in on what we have done today, and I checked with Paul and Jared to make sure that nothing happened while patrolling.

It was all quiet as we watched the sun took its final descend and soft beats of the drums began to fill the night air. There was a gentile breeze that carried the smoke high up into the sky. As the drums continued we walked in slow and steady. Everyone looked right at Emily, and I came and sat beside her and the others divided in two groups on each bench that surrounded us.

I took Emily's hand and held it gently, as softly my dad spoke and there was the soft taps of Old Quil's drum. The fire's light reflected off Dad's face as he told the legend of Hunters and the Great Bear.

Once there was a group of brothers. No hunters were as good as them at following a trail. They never gave up once they began tracking their quarry.
One day, when the cold nights return, an urgent message came to the village of the hunters. A great bear, one so large and powerful that many thought it must be some kind of monster, had appeared. The people of the village whose hunting grounds the monsters had invaded were afraid. The children no longer went out to play in the woods. The long houses of the village were guarded each night by men with weapons, who stood by the entrances.

Each morning, when the people went outside, they found the huge tracks of the bear in the midst of their village. They knew that soon it would become even bolder.

Picking up their spears and calling to their small dog, the hunters set for that village, which was not far away. As they came closer they noticed how quiet the woods were. There were no signs of rabbits or deer and even the birds were silent. On a great pine tree they found the scars where the great bear had reared up on her hind legs and made deep scratches to mark her territory. The tallest of the brothers tried to touch the highest of the scratch marks with the tip of his spear. "It is as the people feared," the first brother said. "This one we are to hunt is Nyah-gwaheh, a monster bear." 

Before long, the hunters and their small dog reached the village. It was a sad sight to see. There was no fire burning in the center of the village and the doors of all the long houses were closed. Grim men stood on guard with clubs and spears and there was no game hung from the racks or skins stretched for tanning. The people looked hungry. 

The elder sachem of the village came out and the tallest of the four hunters spoke to him. 
We are going now to pick up the monster bear's trail." 
"I am not sure you can do that, Nephews," the elder sachem said. "Though we find tracks closer and closer to the doors of our lodges each morning, whenever we try to follow those tracks they disappear." 

The second hunter knelt down and patted the head of their small dog. "Uncle," he said, “that is because they do not have a dog such as ours." He pointed to the two black circles above the eyes of the small dog. "Four-Eyes can see any tracks, even those many days old." 
"May Creator's protection be with you," said the elder sachem.
"Do not worry, Uncle," said the third hunter, "Once we are on a trail we never stop following until we've finished our hunt."
The fourth hunter said. "That's why I think we should have something to eat first." But his brothers did not listen. They nodded to the elder sachem and began to leave.

They walked, following their little dog. It kept lifting up its head, as if to look around with its four eyes. The trail was not easy to find. 

Though they could see no tracks, they could feel the presence of the Nyah-gwaheh. They knew that if they did not soon find her trail, she would make her way behind them. Then they would be the hunted ones. 

Meanwhile, like a pale giant shadow, the Nyah-gwaheh was moving through the trees close to the hunters. Her mouth was open as she watched them and her huge teeth shone, her eyes flashed red. Soon she would be behind them and on their trail. 

Just then, though, the little dog lifted its head and yelped.
"Eh-heh!" the first brother called. 
"Four-Eyes has found the trail," shouted the second brother. 
"We have the track of the Nyah-gwaheh," said the third brother. 
"Big Bear," another yelled, "we are after you, now!" 

Fear filled the heart of the great bear for the first time and she began to run. As she broke from the cover of the pines, the hunters saw her, a gigantic white shape, so pale as to appear almost naked. With loud hunting cries, they began to run after her. The great bear's strides were long and she ran more swiftly than a deer. The hunters and their little dog were swift also though, and they did not fall behind. The trail led through the swamps and the thickets. It was easy to read, for the bear pushed everything aside as she ran, even knocking down big trees. On and on they ran, over hills and through valleys. They came to the slope of a mountain and followed the trail higher and higher, every now and then catching a glimpse of their quarry over the next rise. Now though one of the hunters was getting tired of running. He pretended to fall and twist his ankle. 

"Brothers," he called, "I have sprained my ankle. You must carry me." 

So his brothers did as he asked, two of them carrying him by turns while another hunter carried his spear. They ran more slowly now because of their heavy load, but they were not falling any further behind. The day had turned now into night, yet they could still see the white shape of the great bear ahead of them. They were at the top of the mountain now and the ground beneath them was very dark as they ran across it. The bear was tiring, but so were they. It was not easy to carry their brother. The little dog, Four-Eyes, was close behind the great bear, nipping at her tail as it ran. 

"Brothers, put me down now. I think my leg has gotten better." 

The brothers did as he asked. Fresh and rested, the brother grabbed his spear and dashed ahead of the others. Just as the great bear turned to bite at the little dog, the hunter leveled his spear and thrust it into the heart of the Nyah-Gwaheh. The monster bear fell dead.
By the time the other brothers caught up, the hunter had already built a fire and was cutting up the big bear.

Just then, though, the first hunter looked down at his feet. “Brothers," he exclaimed, "look below us!"
The hunters looked down. Below them were thousands of small sparkling lights in the darkness which. they realized, was all around them.
"We aren't on a mountain top at all," said the third brother. "We are up in the sky." And it was so. The great bear had indeed been magical. Her feet had taken her high above the earth as she tried to escape the hunters. However, their determination, not to give up the chase, had carried them up that strange trail. 
Just then their little dog yipped twice. 

"The great bear!" said the second hunter. "Look!" 
The hunters looked. There, where they had piled the bones, the Great Bear was coming back to life and rising to its feet. As they watched, it began to run again, the small dog close on its heels. 

"Follow me," shouted the first brother. Grabbing up their spears, the hunters again began to chase the great bear across the skies. 

So it was, the old people say, and so it still is. Each autumn the hunters chase the great bear across the skies and kill it. Then, as they cut it up, the blood falls down from the heavens and colors the leaves of the maple trees scarlet. They cook the bear and the fat dripping from their fire turns the grass white. 

If you look carefully into the skies as the seasons change, you can read that story. The great bear is the square shape some call the bowl of the Big Dipper. The hunters and their small dog (which you can just barely see) are close behind, forming the dipper's handle. When autumn comes and that constellation turns upside down, the old people say. "Ah, the lazy hunter has killed the bear." But as the moons pass and the sky moves once more towards spring, the bear slowly rises back on its feet and the chase begins again.


Author's Note: The Blessing that Billy gives Jacob when he puts on the headdress is an actual Cherokee blessing and the story or legend that Billy tells is also an actual Cherokee legend. I changed a few details, for example there are only 4 brothers in the legend and I took that detail out, and the bear has no gender and I made it a 'her', it was also a little longer and I took out a few details because I didn't want it so long, but for the most part it is the same legend.  I would have used a Quileute legend and blessing but I couldn't find one. 

AN2: The next chapter will be Cullen and then the next wolf chapter will pick up right where this ends with the reaction to the legends, and the rest of the funeral.

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:14pm

CHAPTER 5 – SECOND CHANCES

 

Song: The Reason by Hoobastank

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfYJ3BFg-vc&feature=BFa&list...

 

Author's Note: For those curious and wanting to know where Bella is, it is a real place.http://www.newdungenesslighthouse.com/index.html

 

 

EDWARD'S POV

 

I picked up the pace, running faster, Jasper and Alice followed right behind me. As we got closer we could see the storm clouds approaching and knew that we were going the right direction. There was a light house just off of Sequim that I felt confident that was where Victoria took Bella. It had all the requirements of what we were looking for, it was on the way between Seattle and Snag Peak where Bella had been hidden and it was secluded. The man that Victoria had fed from was probably the keeper of the lighthouse.

 

I called Carlisle knowing that we would need him once we made it to Bella, and told him where we were going. He was at Emily's giving another dose of morphine to Seth so that he could hopefully attend Sam's funeral.

“He knows where she is?” I heard Jacob ask.

“Yes,” Carlisle answered. “They aren't there yet, but they should be soon. I need to go back to the house for supplies and then I will be there.” I wasn't sure if he was still talking to Jacob or myself, but I knew that he would be coming soon. So I hung up and called Esme, who was with Rosalie and Emmett searching up into Canada, to tell them where Bella was. They agreed to start heading this direction as well.

 

Alice groaned as she had another vision of Victoria. This time, she was crouched over Bella, who was mumbling in her sleep.

“Wake up!” Victoria hissed and slapped her face.

“Uh,” Bella moaned, her lower lip was dry and cracked and I saw a small amount of blood trickle out the corner of her mouth. Bella shifted as she tried to cover her face protectively. “What do you want?” Bella questioned.

“You have ruined everything.” Victoria hissed.

“How did I do that?” Bella asked weakly.

“Killing you was supposed to destroy Edward, but instead I am forced to consider keeping you alive.”

“How would that make a difference?” Bella whispered.

 

“Edward would have to live with the knowledge that HE lost you. You weren't taken away or killed, but you chose to leave him. He will never be able to move on. I heard about his little trip to Italy, trying to kill himself.” Victoria laughed viciously. “Who would have known that it would be you, who destroyed him.”

“No, no, no.” Bella moaned. “He has his family.”

Victoria brought her face an inch from Bella's. “They... are... not... you.” Victoria said, enunciating each word slowly.

“There has to be something . . .” Bella started to cry, her body was shaking, and I could see the pain it caused each time her body moved.

Suddenly, Victoria began to scream as she released her months and months of pent up frustration on Bella.

 

I didn't need Alice's vision any longer, I could hear Victoria from where we were and she was so filled with hate as she continued to beat Bella.

“We need to hurry, she could easily kill her whether she means to or not.”

Alice nodded and started running quickly to the house. Jasper was used to not knowing the specifics of Alice's visions, therefore he didn't hesitate and followed her without asking any questions.

 

As we approached I could see the lighthouse in the distance and saw the long stretch that secluded the lighthouse from the rest of the area with a shorter branch that the boats launched from.

“Edward, wait!” Jasper called. “I think we need a plan.”

“Oh, good idea, Jasper.” Alice encouraged.

Jasper looked at the back of the lighthouse and we could see the setting sun reflecting off the windows of the tower. The rain was still falling and claps of thunder echoed around us, which would help mask our movements and make it less likely for Victoria to hear our approach.

 

She was also deeply consumed with her hatred for Bella, but hated even more that James had marked her. Through her thoughts, I saw her rip the bandage off of Bella's wrist and Bella began to scream. Victoria looked at Bella's frightened face and her thoughts were full of the pleasure that it brought her. She enjoyed causing Bella to suffer. Victoria began to carve out the once purple scare that was still bleeding from her bite, with her sharp nails. Blood poured from Bella's wrist over her palm and fingers as Victoria continued to claw into her flesh.

 

Alice and I looked at each other as Bella's life completely disappeared.

“No! She can't die.” I shouted.

With my full speed I began to run, everything around me became a blur as I flew past it. I got to the boat launch and leaped as far as I could, landing waist deep in the water on the other side. As I ran out of the water I could hear Jasper and Alice's splash behind me, they knew better than to try and slow me down. We could all still hear Bella's screaming inside and for once it was a beautiful sound, for it meant that she was still alive.

 

Once again I looked through the scenes that I saw from Alice's visions, trying to pick the fastest route possible. I ran to the base of the lighthouse and I could hear Jasper and Alice talking to each other. Jasper wanted them to climb up the side of the house and come in the window while I raced up the staircase. Jasper was going to rely on Alice to tell him when I was at the room that Bella and Victoria were in.

 

I could feel Victoria's resistance caving as more and more of Bella's sweet blood filled the room. Bella tried to fight against Victoria, smearing her blood across Victoria's face and instantly her thought were consumed with her blood lust. Jasper could feel it as well and it was affecting his own blood lust. For a moment, I was nervous about him being near Bella. I saw his mind focus in on Victoria and did what he could to ignore any thoughts of blood, and I knew that I could trust him. Both Alice and Jasper were ready and at the window that went directly into the room. I counted to Alice.

“Three, two, . . .” All at the same time we sprung, myself busting through the door, while Jasper and Alice came through the window. Jasper went straight to Victoria, who was still leaning over Bella, and grabbed her by the hips throwing Victoria towards me. Alice went to Bella, who had passed out from her blood loss. Alice held her breath as she tore the long sleeve of her own shirt to wrap it around Bella's wrist.

 

Victoria landed at my feet and I could feel the fierce monster inside me growl with revenge. She has haunted and stalked the person that I love most for the past year and a half, and has created a living hell for Bella here. There is no doubt that she would have killed Bella if we had not stopped her. It was my life that she was trying to destroy, but she was using Bella to accomplish it. All to avenge a man who never really loved her.

 

Victoria was on the balls of her feet crouched low to the ground and I slammed my foot into her back knocking her chest flat to the floor. I could feel the hard wood floor crack from the force and her hand wrapped around my ankle, but Jasper grabbed her wrist and snapped her hand off. Victoria screamed and cursed as I crouched behind her, her other arm twisted around on her back held firmly with my knee.

 

I leaned over and she could probably feel my breath on her neck as I spoke. “You know James never loved you. You were just a toy, a sport that countered his own gift and created a challenge.”

“You know nothing.” Victoria hissed and spit on my face.

“That is where you are wrong.” I knew that she was aware of my gift to read minds. “Had it been reversed and you had been killed, he would have never looked back.”

“You're a liar. That is not true.” Victoria countered, but I could see the doubt in her mind.

“His last words were nothing but curses.” Jasper added. “There was no desperation to live, not a longing to be with you. He felt nothing for you.”

“All this time, you have been avenging a mate that was nothing more than an affair.” I hissed into her ear. I knew that I couldn't hurt her any more than destroying the 'picture perfect' relationship that she had in her mind of herself and James.

 

Victoria growled with anger, but was no match for Jasper and myself as we held her firmly to the ground. There was no way she was getting away from me again, with one hand I kept her arm pressed into her back and with my teeth sliced across her neck. At the same time I used my other hand and tore her head from her body. Her whole body was shaking and it took me a moment to realize that it was from me, and I could feel my monster rejoice at being allowed to kill and destroy.

 

Then I could feel my muscles relaxing and felt myself getting unnaturally calm. I looked at Jasper, who was using his gift. “Thank you,” I told him.

“Anytime,” he whispered.

Once I was calm, I realized that Victoria was dead. It was finally over. She would never hurt Bella again. Immediately I crouched down at Bella's side, she was so battered and broken, but I could see the soft rise and fall of her chest. She was alive.

“I'm going to take Victoria down and burn her near the shore line.” Jasper handed me a waterproof backpack that he has been carrying. “Here, it has some supplies for Bella.” He gathered Victoria's hand, head, and body and then jumped from the window that he had come through.

 

Alice had both of her hands wrapped firmly around Bella's wrist trying to add pressure to get the blood to stop. She sat down Bella's wrist, took Jasper's backpack from me, and began to get some clean rags and began to wipe some of the blood off Bella's body. I knelt next to Alice, who was still holding her breath. “Go, if you need to. I'll be fine.” I told her.

“Can I bring you something?” She asked.

“I don't think so.” I looked quickly through the backpack and it looked like it had the essential medical supplies needed.

Alice fluttered out the window and I began treating Bella.

 

Her face was so badly bruised and swollen that she didn't look like herself. I brought my hands down her neck, under her shirt so I could feel her right shoulder. It was out of place and I popped it back in as gently as I could. There was a weak moan from Bella, but she remained unconscious. I continued to feel her bones and found a fractured collar bone and four broken ribs on the left side. Bella had jeans on, so I felt through her pants and one leg was badly swollen and probably broken.

 

Her wrist had soaked through Alice's shirt, and I gently unwrapped it and I could see the bright red wound where Bella has been injured over and over. I leaned over and gently kissed her wrist, there was still a little blood there and I could taste it on my lips. It reminded me of when it had been me who sucked the venom out, her blood was perfection. She was perfect for me in every way and I loved her so much.

 

Slowly I cleaned her wrist and wrapped it tightly in clean gauze. There wasn't more that I could do for her until Carlisle arrived. Bella shook slightly, her clothes were still damp and the wind coming from the broken window was not helping. I looked inside the backpack, finding a large blanket rolled in it. I laid it over her body, sitting down on the floor next to her. I gently placed my hands on her face, using my cold skin as ice to get her swelling to go down. There was a piece of Bella's hair down her face and I tucked it behind her ear, leaned over, and kissed her forehead. I was so relieved that she was safe. I knew that it would take some time for her body to heal completely, but she would. I wondered if we would be able to stay in Forks at least long enough for her to heal. My family has almost maxed out our time in Forks and we would be going to the next place. I wasn't ready to leave her.

 

Bella tried to take a deep breath and then I could feel her squirm painfully away from my touch. “Just leave me alone.” Bella mumbled and cringed.

Her resistance hurt, until I realized that she probably thought that my cold touch was Victoria. “Bella?” I questioned. “It's okay, you're safe.”

“Edward?” Bella's eyes fluttered open and I could tell that she was trying to focus them.

“Yes.”

“Oh God, thank you.” Bella immediately started sobbing as she reached out with her arm, trying to touch me.

“Shhh, it's over.” I wanted to hold her, but couldn't because of her being so hurt. I laid down next to her, wrapped my arms around her. Bella leaned her head against my shoulder and clutched tightly to my arm. Bella babbled through her tears and I was just glad to hold her and feel like I was doing some good.

 

“How did you find me?” Bella asked between hiccups.

“Alice. She has been watching you and Victoria, looking for clues.” I took a deep breath and tucked another loose strand of her hair behind Bella's ear. “I'm so sorry that we couldn't get here sooner.”

“Have you seen everything that has been happening?” Bella looked at me in sad amazement.

I nodded my head. “I believe so.”

“Edward, that must have been horrible.”

“Bella, I swear you have no sense of self preservation.” I laughed without humor. “Besides, it wasn't me she was torturing.”

“Wasn't it?” Bella questioned. “I know it was my body, but wasn't that the whole point, for you to suffer.”

“Yes.” I wished that I could tell her how much I hated what she has endured because of me, but I didn't want to frighten her or make her uncomfortable.

 

“I wish that she had just come after me and left you alone.” I said, thinking out loud.

“No,” I felt her clutch on to me a little tighter. “I wouldn't want that.”

“You should. I've brought nothing but trouble to you.”

“No you haven't. There was a time when you made me extremely happy.” Bella lifted her arm and placed her hand on my cheek. “And you still do. You know, you introduced me to love.”

“That wasn't me, that was completely you.”

 

“How about we introduced it to each other?” Bella smiled weakly.

“Deal.” We smiled at each other and I wished that things could always be like this for us.

Bella rested her head back against the floor, looking out the open window. “You know, I still love you,” she whispered.

I felt like I have wanted to hear that so badly for so long. “I love you, more,” I told her.

“I know,” Bella sighed. “I think that you always have.”

 

“Bella, will you ever forgive me?”

Bella looked up at me surprised. “There is nothing to forgive, you didn't cause this.”

“Not for Victoria, even though I do feel responsible for that too, but for everything. You were right, when you said that it was me who broke us up. I'm sorry that I didn't trust you, I thought I knew what was best for you.”

“Yes, I forgive you.” Bella smiled at me, and I knew that she really meant it.

“Would you give me another chance? I really could change.”

 

Bella's mouth dropped open like she didn't know what to say. “I can't. I mean . . .” Bella took a slow breath and I could tell that she was picking her words carefully. “It's not because I won't forgive you, I have forgiven you a long time ago. That doesn't change that you and I aren't we, and I can't go back to that. We are too different, I'm sorry.”

I didn't really expect a different answer, or for her to leave Jacob for me, but I needed to ask. I needed to know that she really did forgive me and for her to know that I would do anything, be anything that I could for her. “Don't be sorry, Bella. I understand.”

 

“I do believe that you have changed. I don't want to say that you learned your lesson, but I know that you have, and I know it would be different a second time.”

“But . . .” I offered.

“But, I want to live. It was so incredibly selfish of me not to think of what me being changed would do to those that love me. And I can't stay human and be with you, it would never work.”

We were both quiet for a while, just lost in our own thoughts. I really could see how she would think that it couldn't work for her to continue to age, while I stayed the same, but her appearance wouldn't matter to me. I would continue to love her no matter what.

 

“Edward?”

“Yes.”

“Is Victoria right? Will you never love again?” Bella asked softly.

“Bella . . .”

“Tell me the truth.”

“I don't want Victoria to be right about anything, but in this case, she is.”

“Can you try? Please, for me.”

“You don't know what you are asking of me,” I said, shaking my head.

 

“I think I do. Isn't that the same thing that you asked of me, when you all left me? You told yourself that I would move on and get over you.”

“I was right.” I reminded her.

“Eventually, yes you were, but it wasn't easy. And I don't expect it to be easy for you either. I just want you to try.”

“Bella, I'm not promising you anything that I can't keep. You're just going to have to live with me loving you, and only you.”

“We'll see about that.” Bella smirked.

“You are so stubborn.”

“Me?” Bella rolled her eyes.

 

Carlisle came in with Alice and I gently rolled away from Bella to give him space. Carlisle set up an IV and gave her some pain medication, and then also she needed blood which he brought for her. As the medication became effective it made her sleepy and she slept, then Alice got Bella into some clean clothes while Carlisle taped up Bella's ribs, her collarbone, and he thought that her left foot would need surgery.

 

“I need to call Jacob to update him. What is the plan?” I asked Carlisle.

“If he can be a little more patient I would like to keep her here over night, allow her to get more fluids in her and some rest. Then we can take her back tomorrow.”

“Alright.”

I gave Jacob a call, but no one answered at his house or at Emily's so I left a message at both places telling him that we have Bella, and explained what Carlisle told me and for him to call me anytime.

 

We looked around the lighthouse and found in the guest house a bedroom and decided to move Bella there so that she could rest more comfortably. It was a large bed and I laid down next to her, not touching her, simply watching her sleep. Sometimes she would talk and mention Jacob or Victoria and would tremble.

“Gaahh,” Bella moaned. “Make it stop,” she groaned.

“Bella,” I whispered softly, “you're okay. It's over.”

“Edward, please.”

“Please, what? I don't understand.” I put my arm behind her shoulders so that her head rested against my chest. I could feel her silent tears as they absorbed into my shirt. I saw Carlisle walk in the room and he gave her some more pain medication.

 

“I need to go home.” Bella mumbled.

“I'll take you home tomorrow,” I promised her as I kissed her hair. “Now just relax and rest.”

“Where's . . .” Bella sniffled, “. . . Jacob?”

“He wasn't able to come.” I answered. “You'll see him soon.” I could feel her body relax, and I wasn't sure if it was the pain medication or knowing that she would be going home that allowed her to sleep peacefully the rest of the night.

 

 

BELLA'S POV

 

I woke up and it was still dark outside. I was laying with my cheek resting on Edward's chest, his cold body felt very good, but my mind kept going back to being with Victoria and I would tremble and shake. When I was with her, I had never been more scared in my life, and I hated it. Each time she would hit me I would just pray that somehow Jacob would figure out where I was and rescue me. So it was quite surprising that Jacob was no where to be found. It was even worse when she bit me because I wasn't sure if Edward would be there to suck it back out. Being with Victoria was literally a nightmare so it didn't surprise me that I kept dreaming about the experience. Edward rubbed his hand down my arm or would tuck the blankets closer around me trying to make me feel better. As much as I was really grateful to be rescued and I enjoyed being with all the Cullens, I really just wanted to go home. I missed Jacob, and I was tired of being cold all the time.

 

“How are you feeling?” Edward asked.

“Cold.” I answered. He shifted away and my head landed on my pillow. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean that you had to back off. Your skin feels good to my face.”

“You look better. I'm sorry to wake you up, but if you feel up for it we will be leaving soon.”

I took a slow breath to help wake myself up and tried to set up, but my ribs were still very sore and I moaned in pain. Edward put his hand gently over my ribs and I could feel his cold skin ease some of the pain. “Thank you.”

 

“Edward, is Seth okay? Did Victoria really hurt him?” I was curious about everything that I missed during the battle.

“I know that he was hurt very badly, but he is healing. It was very painful for him, but Carlisle feels like he will make a complete recovery.”

“Oh good, I just don't think I could handle it if any of them got hurt for me.”

Edward took my hand in his and brushed his thumb across the back of my hand. “Bella, I do have some bad news.”

Immediately my heart started racing and Edward kissed the top of my head. “What happened? Was it Jacob?”

“No, it wasn't Jacob, calm down. It was Sam, he was killed.”

 

I couldn't believe that Sam was dead. “Oh no, I need to be there.” I tried to sit up again, and winced badly and Edward wrapped his arms around me. “I can't believe it, this is all my fault.”

“Be still, Bella, it is not your fault. I am sorry that he died, but Sam died doing what he was created to do, protecting his people and that included you.”

“Is that why Jacob is not here?” I asked.

“Yes, believe me Jacob wanted to be here very badly. We have been talking to him often and keeping him informed on what is happening.” Edward confirmed.

 

“Tell me more of what I missed from the battle.” I relaxed back on the bed and let Edward hold me as he told me of the newborn families, fighting them, and of Kate and Irina being there. I was really surprised about that, he was sad that Irina was destroyed, but at the same time he understood that she shouldn't have been there. I cried as he also told me of Victoria attacking Jacob and that he sucked out the venom that saved Jacob's life. Crying really hurt, and whenever my body shook I would moan in pain.

 

“I would like Carlisle to give you some more pain medication for the car ride home, it will make it much less painful for you.”

“Alright,” I agreed, knowing that he was right.

“We would like to keep you at our house for the next few days, if you don't mind.” Carlisle said, as he walked into the room to give me the pain meds.

“I don't mind, but what about Jacob?” I asked.

“He is welcome to be there.” Carlisle answered.

I looked over at Edward. “Are you sure?”

“Absolutely, I'm sure that he is anxious to get you back.” Edward answered.

 

I nodded my head, I was so ready to be back with Jacob, but I was glad to have this opportunity to be with Edward. I have never felt like we have been given a real goodbye. I interlaced my fingers with Edward's, “Will you be there too?” I asked, as I could feel the medication making me sleepy.

“I'll be anywhere you want me to be,” he answered.

I smiled weakly, brought his hand up, and kissed the back of his hand as my head slumped back into unconsciousness.

 

The next thing I knew I was in the back seat of Rosalie's BMW. There were several pillows around me and I was in Edward's lap. “Where are we?” I mumbled.

“We are about ten minutes away.” Edward answered. “I hope you don't mind me holding you, I thought it would be more comfortable than a seat belt across your ribs.”

“Sure, sure.” I really didn't care where I was sitting. I could feel that Edward had me in his arms slightly lifted so that I couldn't feel the bumps in the road and my head was resting against his shoulder. We settled into a comfortable silence.

 

As we continued the scenery became more familiar and I knew that we were not far at all.

“Edward, are you going to be alright?”

“Of course, Bella.”

“Don't lie to me, I can handle the truth.”

“Sorry, I know that you can. Honestly, I don't know. I am going to miss you.”

“I'll miss you too.”

 

“Do you like us being friends, or does that just make it harder for you?” I asked.

“I would rather be your friend than nothing at all.”

“But aren't you just wishing that Jacob will do something stupid enough that I come back to you?” I challenged.

“Of course, this is Jacob we are talking about. He is bound to do something stupid eventually.” Edward teased.

He flashed me his crooked smile and I could hear the humor in his voice masking what he was probably hoping would come true some day. While I wanted to defend Jacob, I knew that most likely he would do something stupid, but so would I, and we would just have to work through it together.

 

“Watch what you wish for, I think I can only be put back together so many times.”

“I know.” Edward whispered so softly that I almost didn't hear him. I looked at his face and I could see a strange mixture of longing and regret. I didn't like seeing him like that. When I was with him there was a part of me that wanted to stay, but it was the part of me that hated to see others hurting and wanted to make it better. It wasn't really what I wanted, but no matter how much time had passed I could still feel the connection that we had to one another.

“I'm sorry.” I whispered back.

“Bella, I know that this is how it should be. And I am glad that Jacob has put your heart back together. I do not want you to worry about me.”

“Sure, sure.” I rolled my eyes. “Like that is not going to happen.”

 

We pulled up into front of the Cullen's home and I was instantly excited to be back home. I put both of my arms around his neck. “Thank you, for bringing me back.” I whispered next to his ear.

“You don't have to thank me for that.”

I knew that he was right and I hugged him as tightly as I could without hurting myself and I could feel him holding me as he shifted himself to be able to get us out of the car without hurting me. He was looking right at me in the eyes like he wanted to memorize what he saw, even though I knew that it wasn't really possible for him to forget.

“Thank you,” I said as I reached up and kissed his cheek.

He held me close and smiled. “Always, I'll always be here for you Bella.”

 

“I know. Goodbye.” I whispered so softly, but I knew that he would hear me. I tighten my arms around his neck and I was going to kiss his cheek again right as Edward turned like he heard something and my lips landed on his.

 

It was only a second and Edward's eyes widened in such surprise that it made me start laughing.

“What are you laughing at?” Edward smiled back at me.

“Your shocked face. Sorry, I didn't mean to actually kiss you.”

“You don't have to apologize to me for that,” he teased. I scowled playfully at him. “But Jacob might appreciate hearing it,” Edward said, as he turned us around and Jacob was standing right there.

“Jake!” I cried, I was so glad to see him. I tried to lunge towards him, but moving hurt badly and so Edward walked towards Jacob with his arms outstretched.

 

 

 

 

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:17pm

 

AN: There is an actual Wolf dance that the Quileute people do, so that is what the dance that Jacob and his brothers do is based on. But dancing is really hard to describe so I don't think I did very well. Sorry.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6vtafaw7MA&feature=related

CHAPTER 6 - LEGENDS

song: The Sun Will Rise by Brendan James 

- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6tEqQLdby4&feature=autoplay&...

Dad finished telling the story and I looked right into his eyes. I knew that we were the Hunters in the tale and vampires were the Great Bear, and the chase would continue from one generation to the next. After the story, Dad picked his drum back up and I heard the familiar beats to the dance that we knew very well. I kissed Emily's hand and then I stood up from my seat. I walked in a circle, offering a hand to each of the pack members, inviting them to accompany me in the dance. We formed a circle around the glowing fire.

The dance was not complicated, just shuffling from one foot to the other to the beat of the drums and would spin around and some intricate foot work and then spin back around. It was the first time that I really paid attention to the specific foot work and I must admit I thought we looked really good all moving together.

We were half way through, as we turned around the fire Paul tripped and Jared grabbed onto his shoulder to keep him away from the fire. It was very strange because none of us tripped anymore and even though he picked right back up into the dance he seemed distracted. There was a low growl that rumbled in my chest and he snapped his head to me and I saw him lower it in an apology. Then the drums changed and it was time to carry Sam to the sacred grounds.

Leah went to Emily, offering her hand to her and they walked together in the lead and then together the guys carried Sam's coffin. I carried Dad while Old Quil brought Dad's chair for me, and Quil carried Seth. There was a narrow trial from the beach to the grounds, the trail was lined with drift wood that glowed from the moonlight. The crowd followed behind and there was the soft patter of feet as we walked along the path.

There were candles on each of the graves so that the names written on the stones could be seen. As we approached, there was a large hole and ropes over it where they sat the box on. Old Quil unfolded Dad's chair and I sat him on it, he gave some final words to the group that reflected more on Sam. There was a chance for others in the community to mention memories or things that they appreciated about Sam. After they said what they wanted to, they could stay and listen to others, or head back to their own homes. At sunrise Sam would be lowered into the ground.

I had no idea what I wanted to say, nothing seemed significant enough that I would actually be able to say in front of other people. Emily was sitting next to the casket and her sister was with her. We were sitting together as a united pack with the addition of Kim and Jackie in the group. We were all thankful to no longer be the center of attention. Everyone had tears in their eyes or running down their cheeks, including my own. Leah was next to me and she started shaking and I could see her still trying to hold back.
“Come with me.” I whispered to her and reached out for her hand. Leah shook her head, but still got up and allowed me to lead her away. Neither of us said anything for a while as we walked, both of us lost in our own thoughts and tears.
“Why wasn't I enough?” Leah whispered.
“Leah, don't do this to yourself. You know that we don't really know why some imprint. Don't tell my dad, but the only theories we have for it are really stupid.”
Leah gave a chuckle. “I know.”
“Why Emily and not you? Why not Bella for me?” I shrugged. “I can't explain it.”

“But Jacob, I was perfect for him. I'm not saying that Emily wasn't, but I still wished he had stayed.”
“Would you really have wanted him to imprint on you?” I asked.
“If it would have kept him with me, yes. Don't you ever wish that you had imprinted on Bella?”
“Only for the security that it would bring and put that to rest.” I answered.
“Yeah, I get that.”
“I know you do, more than any other.”
“It is . . . so horrible . . .” With that the title wave that Leah has been trying to hold back erupted and she crumbled to the ground with my arms wrapped around her. She cried violently into my chest which would have been extremely scary, but I knew that she needed this.

I couldn't help but wonder if this was going to be Bella some day. That I would one day imprint and leave her. I always felt confident that I wouldn't imprint, but was I just being stubborn about that? I silently watched and listened as Leah both cursed Sam and loved him at the same time. Most of all, she hated that she felt both. I knew I would hate myself if I did that to Bella, especially if I stole away her chance to love someone else. I could see with Leah that she was imprisoned by her love for Sam, not being able to move on.

I wasn't sure how long it was, but it felt like a long time that we held on to each other, then Leah rested her head against my shoulder. We were both tired and it had been a very long emotional day.
“Let's get back,” Leah whispered.
“Okay.” We untangled ourselves from each other and started walking back towards the others. There wasn't anything more that needed to be said so we walked in silence.

As we approached, I noticed that most of the community had gone to their houses and there was just Emily's family, the wolves, and my family. I have to say, I was really surprised that Rachel was still here but it was nice. She was over at Mom's grave with tears streaming down her face with Dad, Jared and Paul standing with her. Dad was holding her hand and Paul had his arm around her shoulders, and her head was leaning against him.

I tried not to let it bother me, but I did not like the way Paul was looking at my sister. However I wanted to believe that he was just being nice, he wasn't a complete moron to try something during a funeral. I went over to Emily gave her a quick hug and then went over to Brady, Colin, Embry, Quil, and Seth. Seth was laying down on his back asleep, Sue had given him the rest of the morphine and so he would be out of it the rest of the evening. Next to Seth was his young cousin, sleeping with her head on his shoulder, she was cute with braided pig tails on each of her shoulders.

“Hey guys,” I acknowledged as I sat down with them. We spoke softly with each other, it was easy and comfortable. Embry bumped my shoulder and nodded his head towards the sleeping child. She had rolled over so that she was completely on the ground and Quil brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. I gave a confused look back at Embry and he looked back at Quil, maybe I was just being slow or sleep deprived, but I had no idea what he was trying to say. Quil lifted her slightly so that her head rested back on Seth's arm and she tucked her legs up to her chest and Quil smoothed out her dress so that her legs were completely covered. I admit that I hadn't really seen Quil around kids before and he was much more attentive than I would have thought, but it was sweet.

I looked around again and Emily was still with her family it was probably a few hours from sunrise and the exhaustion was showing on everyone, but I could understand why those who were here hadn't left. Except for Rachel, there were several long benches scattered around for people to sit on when visiting, her and Paul were sitting on one talking to each other. She looked really tired with her head leaning on his shoulder and he was holding her hand.

I got up and walked over to them, Paul looked at me for a second and then right back at Rachel. For a moment it made me think that Paul was nervous, I had never seen him like that before.
“Hey Rach,” I said, sitting next to her.
“Jake,” she nodded her head like it weighed a ton and blinked her eyes to keep them open.
“Do you want me to walk you back home?” I asked her.
“No, you need to stay.” Rachel answered.
“I'll walk her back.” Paul offered.
“I don't think so.” I tried to reply casually, but I don't think it worked.

“Straight there and back, I swear.” Paul tried to reason. There was a low rumble that gathered in my chest as I stared back at Paul. “Or not,” Paul mumbled.
“Quil,” I called, but he didn't hear me. “Quil,” I tried again, but he was completely lost in his own world. What was happening to the authority that I used to have? Once again my chest rumbled and Quil snapped his eyes to me. “Get your ass over here.” I rolled my eyes as he jumped to his feet. I was going to have him walk Rachel home, but now I had something else that I felt I needed to talk to him about. So instead I called Brady over and he walked with Rachel to our house.

“What is going on?” I looked at both Paul and Quil, and they were both extremely nervous and distracted at the same time.
“I imprinted . . .” Paul answered.
“Me too.” Quil added, at the same time Paul said, “... on Rachel.”
I was extremely shocked and I couldn't speak for a moment, I could feel my mouth hang open like an idiot, but wasn't able to care. Without further thought my fist slammed into Paul's nose, with a satisfying crunch.

“What the hell?” I yelled. I was so angry my arms were shaking and I wanted to rip his throat out. Of all people, PAUL had imprinted on my sister.
“Dammit, sorry.” Paul whined as he put his hand over his face and then started to straighten his nose so it wouldn't heal crocked. Of all the times for Paul to not put up a fight it was now! Paul was always ready for a fight or willing to create one if there was nothing to fight about. There was something very different about him, for him to allow me to break his nose without a single punch thrown back or even a slight trimmer. Despite Quil thinking that Paul was going to imprint, I never believed it and Paul could care less if he ever imprinted.

Dad and Old Quil noticed me hit Paul and both came over to see what was going on. I could see the confusion on both of their faces, but also resistance they didn't seem to want to step in unless they felt like they had to.
Then I turned to Quil. “Did you imprint on Rachel too?” I could hear Paul's growl rumbling next to me.
“No, but you still might hit me.” Quil answered cautiously.
“What could possibly be worse than that?” I asked.
“Him imprinting on Claire.” Embry answered.
I felt like that stupid shocked expression was going to become permanent at this point.

“What?” I asked.
“So those legends are true.” Old Quil murmured.
“You have got to be kidding me, we can imprint on babies?” I asked in complete astonishment.
“Yes.” Dad answered.
I looked back at Quil and I didn't know what to say. “Don't look at me like that.” Quil challenged. “It is not what you think.”
“Help me to understand.” I really did want to, Quil has been my best friend since we were kids and I knew from what I saw of him taking care of Claire that he would never hurt her, but it did not make any sense.

“Yes, I imprinted on her, but it is different. The level of devotion and commitment is the same from what I have felt from Jared or Sam, but there is a protectiveness that is even more powerful. I only want her to be safe, happy, and cared for.”
“Do you love her?” I asked. From what I knew of imprinting everything he said was true, however they also felt love and a romantic desire for their imprint.
“I do, but not like that,” he answered. I wasn't surprised that he knew what I was asking him. “I swear to you it is innocent.”
“I believe you.” Any doubts that I had I knew could get cleared up the next time we phased together. I felt it was more important for Quil to have my support, not just as his alpha, but also as his best friend.

“What does this mean for those of us who haven't imprinted?” Embry asked.
“You all have known that everyone of you could imprint.” Old Quil answered.
“But I thought that imprinting was rare?” I countered.
“That is what we thought, Jake.” Dad responded. “But of the original pack only you and Embry have not imprinted. I have to be honest it makes me nervous.”
“Jake, Billy didn't want me to tell you, but I have always thought that you would imprint.” Old Quil added.
“Why?” I asked him.

“Because you are alpha, and were always suppose to be, therefore it made sense for you to imprint.”
“And for that same reason, I felt like you wouldn't.” Dad added. “Imprinting makes that one person more important than anything, even your pack. So because of you being alpha I thought that you would not imprint.” This was so much information to take in and to say that I was royally freaked out would have been an understatement. Dad placed his hand on my own. “Jake, I'm sorry, but there is just too much that we don't know about when it comes to imprinting.”
“However, with Quil imprinting on a child, we could imprint at any time. She might not even be born yet!” I had a sick feeling in my stomach.

I couldn't do to Bella what Sam had done to Leah. I had been so certain that I was never going to imprint. At the time Quil's theory seemed to work suggest that was correct, because I never once felt like there was someone else out there for me to find. Maybe that was because she wasn't out there. Yet. I felt like everything was caving in on me at once, I needed to think.

“Jacob,” Brady called to me.
“Yeah.” I replied.
“I took Rachel home, and there was a message from Edward on your machine.”
“What did he say?” My heart leaped into my throat at just the mention of an update to know what was happening.
“He said that they have Bella, she is badly hurt, but stable. Carlisle wanted to give her fluids overnight and bring her back in the morning. They would leave there right before sunrise, to not draw attention to themselves.”
“Alright, thank you.” I was so relieved that Bella was alright. Now what in the world was I going to do about imprinting. I couldn't be the one to hurt her. I wouldn't destroy her by leaving her for another person and ruin her chances of finding someone for herself. I was going to have to do the unthinkable and let her go.

I couldn't bring her into my mess until I have had the chance to straighten it out. I walked in a large circle around the sacred grounds until I could see the sky start to brighten and took my place next to Emily. There was a small feather from a baby eagle that Emily placed in the center of the box and then the guys used the ropes to lower the box into the ground. We each gathered dirt in our hands and some shovels and filled the hole.

The sky filled with several shades of orange as the bright round circle gave the promise of a new day. Then everyone went to their own homes. Paul went back to my house with Dad and was going to be sleeping on the couch. Leah carried Seth, he seemed to be feeling better and was comfortable as long as he didn't move. Quil carried Claire and directed the rest of Emily's family to the resort and they would be staying there for the next several days. I walked with Emily back to her house, it was eerily quiet when we walked inside. Emily gathered some clean clothes and went into the bathroom and I could hear her wash her face and hands and then I borrowed a pair of Sam's shorts and did the same.

When I came back out, Emily had some biscuits and sausage on a plate.
“Here,” she said as she handed it to me.
“I'll eat if you do.” I challenged, I handed her one of the biscuits.
“Alright.” I wasn't sure if she was actually hungry or just too tired to fight me. It was strange and comfortable at the same time, so I didn't feel the need to fill the silence and neither did Emily. After eating Emily wanted some time to herself, so I agreed to leave her there with a promise that I was going to come back and check on her soon.

I gave Edward a call and they were almost home and Bella was asleep with him in the back seat, so I told him that I would meet him at their house. I knew that Bella would be coming back very soon and I wanted to run to her, but I still had no idea what I was going to do once I saw her. As I began to walk to the Cullens I decided to phase and let the wolf have a chance to relax. It felt great to have my paws in the dirt and allow the wolf to carry the heavy emotional burden that I have been under lately. I made it to the Cullen's property, phased back and rested against the trunk of a tree until I saw their car pull up to the front of their house.

From this distance I watched for a moment as Edward got out of the back seat with Bella in his arms. Her arms were around his neck and she smiled at him. “Thank you,” she said as she kissed his cheek. He held her close. “Always, I'll always be here for you Bella.”
A promise that I knew that I couldn't make, and it killed me as I began to walk towards them. I'm not sure if Edward heard me or smelled me first, but he had to know that I was there.

“I know, goodbye,” Bella whispered so softly, that I could barely hear her. She tighten her arms around his neck and then their lips landed on each others. It surprised me, and I almost said something, but then Bella was laughing, and I couldn't figure out what was so funny.
“What are you laughing at?” Edward asked.
“Your shocked face. Sorry, I didn't mean to actually kiss you.” Bella told Edward.
“You don't have to apologize to me for that, but Jacob might appreciate hearing it,” Edward said, as he turned around and Bella saw me standing right in front of them. Edward was right, it was good to hear and know that their kiss wasn't real.

“Jake!” Bella called, breaking me even further. I could see her excitement to see me behind her bruised face and arms, her wrist and foot was bandaged and it made me sick to know that she had been so abused.
She tried to get out of his arms and Edward walked towards me with his arms stretched out for me to take her into my own.
“No,” I whispered. “Keep her.”
“What?” Edward and Bella said at the same time.

I flashed Edward the memories of Paul and Quil's imprinting and of Leah's break down. “Please, help Bella to understand.” I said to Edward, before I slowly kissed her lips, and her forehead and then took off into the woods, hearing both of them yelling for me to come back.


Author's Note: I know, I know – I'm evil.
For those of you who are thinking that Jacob would never do this to Bella (you know who you are) let me take you through how this ending came about. I had this idea for Jacob to leave Bella because of being freaked out about imprinting, and the whole time I was writing this chapter the Jacob in my head kept telling me “I'm not going to do it, I won't leave her, not after being away from her for so long and being so worried about her. It is just not going to happen.” So I worked out a compromise that was different and when I got ready to write out the compromise, Jacob leaves her. I seriously wanted to slap him.
So if you want to slap him, I'm right there with you. I'm sorry that Jacob and Bella are still not together, but Jacob has some things that he needs to work out and it will take him a while. I wanted to add this really isn't about making the decision FOR Bella, but rather what HE wants to do about it. He needs to make this decision for himself before he tries to make it with Bella.

 

**** 

Originally I had this in the previous chapter in Bella's pov, however later I felt like it was so shocking that the last paragraph over shadowed the ENTIRE chapter.  So I changed it to be revealed in this chapter however I still have a soft spot for it in her POV so I am including it now as an "out take" 

 

OUT TAKE - Bella's POV 

“You don't have to apologize to me for that,” he teased. I scowled playfully at him. “But Jacob might appreciate hearing it,” Edward said, as he turned us around and Jacob was standing right there.

“Jake!” I cried, I was so glad to see him. I tried to lunge towards him, but moving hurt badly and so Edward walked towards Jacob with his arms outstretched.

 

"No," Jacob whispered. "Keep her." 

"What?" Edward and I said at the same time. 

I saw that Jacob had a painful expression on his face and I could tell that he was showing Edward something in his mind. Edward was still moving towards Jacob and I could feel my body lightly brush against Jacob's as he moved closer.

"Please, help Bella to understand." He said to Edward, before he slowly kissed my lips, my forehead, and then took off into the woods. 

"Jacob, no." Edward called. 

"Wait, Jacob, please come back." I yelled, but he didn't.  "Edward, what happened?" I asked. 

"Stupid, boy." I head Edward mumble, before carrying me back inside their house. 

 

 

 

 

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:23pm

 

Song – Lead Me by Sanctus Real

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLr6G8Xy5uc&ob=av2e


Chapter 7 - FIGHT

I ran off into the trees, pushing my legs as fast I could without looking back. I knew that if I stopped for a second, hearing them calling me back would make me turn around, but I just couldn't. I needed more time to think and I knew that I couldn't be with Bella at the same time.

I have seen how happy Bella can be with Edward, up close and personal when she lost her memory. Even though she isn't the same now, I knew that he would make her happy. She would be well taken care of until I could get myself together and figure out what I should do.

I paused for a moment, took my shorts off, and exploded into my wolf. There weren't any other wolves phased so I was able to have time to myself. Even though I was extremely tired because I had only slept a few hours in the past two days, my wolf was loving the chance to run. I ran through the trees, leaping over fallen logs, feeling the soft moist dirt as it was flung behind me. I ran straight North to a place far from the beach, where a branch of the ocean created a stream that flowed into a large pond. Once there I jumped directly into the water, phasing underwater in order to be able to swim easier. The water felt great and was really relaxing. The sun was bright and I could feel it on my skin as I swam from one side of the pond to the other.

After more laps than I could count, I allowed myself to float around on my back. My mind was torn between wanting to try and figure out what I was going to do and begging me to let myself sleep. In all honesty, I decided that I needed to take my time and allow myself time to think clearly. I got out of the water and phased back, running home. When I got to the trees outside my house I could hear the soft snores of two sleeping people and one person moving around in the kitchen.

I phased back and pulled my shorts on, they were damp but would dry quickly, and went inside. Rachel was sitting at the small kitchen table with a cup of coffee in her hand and I saw Paul sprawled across the couch. I almost wanted to laugh because it looked like he was going to fall off at any moment, one leg was already dragging on the floor.
Rachel must have followed my line of sight. “Yeah, I keep waiting for him to fall off too, and somehow he is still holding on for dear life.”
I smiled at her. “Yeah, he is talented like that.” I didn't normally drink coffee, but if I was going to carry on any type of conversation with Rachel I was going to need it. I added enough milk and sugar so that it tasted almost nothing like coffee and sat down at the table.

“So, you're a werewolf.” She said hesitantly.
“Yes. I'm sorry that I had to be vague with you about how I knew Sam, but I couldn't tell you. We didn't know how long you would be staying, and it was just better for you not to know.”
“I understand.”
“So what has Paul told you.” I guessed, it was him who told her.
“I think pretty much everything. It was really late last night so I'm not sure that I understood everything.” Rachel paused and took a drink from her mug. “I'm sure that we have a lot more to talk about and work through.”
“That makes sense, it gets very complicated.”
“Have you imprinted?” Rachel asked.
“No.”

We were both quiet as I drank the coffee in three large swallows. All it did was remind me that my stomach was empty, therefore I got myself a large bowl, filled it with cereal and poured milk into it before sitting back at the table.
“Rachel, what was it like for you when Paul imprinted?”
“I had no idea what had happened, but it was while you all were dancing and Paul looked right at me. When he tripped, I thought my heart was going to leap right out of my chest.”
“So, do you feel connected to him?”
“Yes and no. It is weird, my brain knows that I don't even know Paul, but there is also this part of me that feels like I have always known him. What is Paul like?”

“Umm, uh . . .” I didn't know how to answer her.
“That bad, huh.” Rachel laughed.
“Well, let me put it this way. If Paul hadn't imprinted and you were just asking, I would have told you to run for your life. And I would kill him for even thinking of messing with you.”
“Thanks for the support, bro.” Paul mumbled from the couch.
“You would say the same thing to your sister, if you had one.” I defended.
“It's different now. I would never hurt her.” Paul promised.

“Sure, sure,” I groaned. “What if he didn't want his imprint?”
“Shut up, Jacob.” I heard Paul from the couch.
“Jeez, Jake, thanks for the confidence.” Rachel scowled.
I rolled my eyes. “I'm not saying that he doesn't, but would that hurt you?” I asked Rachel.
“I don't know, I really don't.”
“Yeah, alright.” I just didn't know what it was like for the girl when we imprinted on them.
“Why so many questions?” Rachel asked.
“I'm just trying to figure some things out with Bella. If I were to imprint what it would do to her, and now I'm wondering what it would do to this mystery girl if I tried to fight it to stay with Bella.”

“Don't do it.” Paul added, as he got up from the couch and walked towards the table.
“Fighting it is my only option.” I countered.
“Well then your option sucks.” Paul said bluntly.
“Tell me about it.” I mumbled as I got up from the table, washed my empty bowl and put it away. I leaned back against the counter and I could feel every part of my body was heavy with exhaustion.
“Have you slept at all, Jakey?” Rachel asked.
“Not really.” I shook my head. “Wake me if you all need anything. Other than that, everyone is off.” I told Paul, as I wondered to my room.

I was asleep so fast that I didn't even have time to notice Bella's scent surround me as I laid across my bed with her pillow held tightly.
I saw myself standing in a church, with cedar beams across the ceiling and white walls. There were several windows with stain glass that added color and beauty to the room. My family and friends were all around me and behind me were several candles and dozens red roses decorating the front stage. The back doors opened and I could feel myself smiling as I locked eyes with the girl in front of me. She was beautiful with her pale skin against her long, elaborate wedding dress. Her chestnut hair flowed down her back in soft curls and her chocolate brown eyes sparkled.

I took her hands and I could see how much she loved me and I knew that I loved her even more. Completely filled with joy and peace my eyes scanned across the audience, stopping at the back of the room where Bella was looking at me with silent tears streaming down her face. I was confused, who was I marrying? I looked back and forth between her and this mysterious girl standing next to me. Why wasn't she Bella?

I looked back at Bella as she began walking forward.
“Fight for me,” Bella said.
“Bella?” I questioned.
“You promised me, that you would never hurt me like HE did.”
“I'm sorry.” I told her.
“Don't be sorry, Jake. Fight, fight for me.”
“I don't know how?”

“Lead me with strong hands, stand up when I can't.” Bella spoke calmly, as she continued to walk towards me. “Don't leave me hungry for love, chasing dreams. What about us? Show me you're willing to fight, that I'm still the love of your life.”
Bella placed her hand on my arm, and I wanted to touch her, but my hands were still holding on to this random stranger who had captured me and wouldn't let go. I tried to drop her hands, but she held on tighter.
“You're MINE!” She hissed.

I awoke with a startle, but I shouldn't have because it was the same dream that I have had night after night. It was getting to the point that I hated going to my bedroom because it was a constant reminder of Bella, and I wasn't any closer to making a decision on what I should do. It didn't help that Edward kept calling over and over saying that he had something really important to tell me, but I didn't want to hear it. I carried on with my pack responsibilities and no one mentioned Bella to me even though I could see in their eyes that they wanted to, especially Embry. He and I were the only wolves in a relationship, if you could call myself and Bella a relationship, with someone that wasn't our imprint.

But I couldn't talk to Embry, or really anyone. The only exception to that was Emily, but I couldn't say that I actually talked to her. She wanted to stay in bed most of the time unless someone encouraged her to get clean clothes on and eat a full meal, despite not being hungry. I would hold her while she cried and made sure that she continued to take care of herself. Being over at Emily's helped me to avoid Charlie as well, he called my house all the time and poor Dad was covering for me as best as he could. Charlie was told that Bella was in a car accident, she had dropped off Alice and was taking the car across town when someone ran a stop sign and slammed into Bella. It knocked her car completely off the road, but didn't stop. Charlie insisted on filing a report for a hit and run, but Bella told him she didn't see who hit her or anything that would be helpful. I never heard the specifics of which Cullen car had to be destroyed to fabricate that story, but I didn't really care.

I was usually in a terrible mood because I wasn't sleeping well and Emily wasn't sleeping either because she didn't like being alone.
“Jacob, you should go home. I'll be fine.” Emily smiled, trying to convince me.
“Sure, sure.” I mumbled. We were sitting next to each other on her couch pretending to watch something on TV, but neither of us cared what was on. Emily stood up to go to her room and I was trying to muster up the energy to go home and deal with more dreams of me with some girl that I didn't know, and breaking Bella's heart.
“Or, you can stay there. It doesn't matter to me.” Emily patted my shoulder before going to her room and closing the door behind her.

I took a deep breath and stretched out across the couch. I was tired of trying to make decisions, thinking about Bella and imprinting was really difficult. But mostly I was just plain tired. I watched the TV until my eyes closed and I fell asleep. It was the best sleep I have had in a long time. I didn't hear anything all night and I was completely dream free. Therefore, the couch became a great resting place and each morning I woke up a little sore from sleeping awkwardly, but I could smell the breakfast that Emily was making.
“Hey,” I greeted Emily.
“Good morning,” she answered. “I can't imagine that couch being that comfortable for you.”
“It's not, but at least I can sleep.” I had told Emily about my repeated dream after she became really curious about why I wasn't just going home.

I stretched and went to the bathroom before joining Emily at the table for breakfast.
“Any plans today?” She asked.
“Seth is suppose to go to Carlisle today for an evaluation and if passes then he will phase for the first time. His poor wolf is ready to pop, it would really suck if he took a bite out of Carlisle.”
“Why don't you go with him.” Emily suggested.
“I can't.”
“Because of Bella.” Emily said softly.
“Yes, she is still there.”

“Leah said that she could leave the Cullens, if she had someone to help take care of her.” Emily added.
“I know.”
“You are being stupid, Jacob.” Emily said bluntly.
“Do you think Leah would agree with you?” I challenged back, knowing that we had both just tap danced on very sensitive issues.
“Yes,” Emily answered softly. “I know how badly Leah has been hurt because of imprinting, however I think she would say that love is worth the risk, but you should ask her.”
“I don't know about that. Leah has calmed down a lot and I would call us friends, but I don't know if she would be that honest. There are some things we just don't talk about, and her feelings are one of them.”
Emily nodded her head. “Yeah, I get that, but you will never know unless you ask.”

We settled into a comfortable silence and later Seth showed up. He has fully recovered from his injuries and we walked out together to phase. I wanted to make sure that I phased with him to make sure that nothing happened in the shifting process. It was a complete success and Seth and I ran together through the trees and I could tell that we both enjoyed the exercise. For the most part we kept our thoughts to ourselves, but I couldn't help but notice Bella in his. He saw her today and she was so beautiful despite being still slightly bruised. Her arm was in a sling to allow her collarbone to heal, and her foot was in cast with one crutch under her other arm. Seth gave her a big, but gentle, hug and sat down with her on the front steps of the house. They chatted while Carlisle checked over Seth.

She really misses you. Seth said, when he noticed me watching his thoughts.
I miss her too. Did Edward explain why I'm not there? I asked.
I guess he did, when I got there today Bella already knew that you were freaked out about imprinting. Leah has also visited her, telling her more about Paul and Quil.
How is she handling it? I asked.
Okay,I guess. She believes that you will come back to her. And you will, right?
I don't know.

We were quiet the rest of our run, and I stayed with him until he phased back. Afterwards, Seth seemed a little uncomfortable, but that might have been because he went several days without phasing and his muscles were sore. So I told him that I would visit with him tomorrow to make sure that he was still doing okay. I could tell that he was tired of being treated like a baby, but he was just going to have to deal with it for a little bit longer.

After leaving Seth, I decided to go for a walk. Seeing Bella today, even through Seth's mind, made me want to run to her and wrap her in my arms and never leave again. However it also made me see that she was doing alright without me. That is what I wanted most for her, and for her not to worry that the person she was with would one day leave her.

I went back to Emily's and as I walked in the door I could smell BBQ. Emily was sitting in her chair, reading a book. When a timer went off, she started to get up.
“Wait, do you want me to get whatever is ready?” I asked standing behind her. She looked really tired and I knew that she was often out of energy by the end of the day.
“Sure, there are several potatoes and a brisket.”
I turned the oven off, got pot holders from the kitchen and got everything out of the oven. “Is this stuff for tonight or later?” The way that Emily was always cooking I never knew what it was for.
“Tonight.” Emily sighed.
“Then just stay there and I'll bring you a plate.”
I sliced the meat and prepared the potatoes, asking Emily how she liked hers and then brought her plate. I sat on the couch while I ate my own food, as always it was delicious. After we were full, we both did dishes and then settled back down on the couch.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew it was dark and I could hear Emily scream. I bolted from the couch looking around the room before I went to her door and opened it.
“Emily?” I called cautiously.
“Sam?”
“Um . . . uh, no.” Even though it was dark I could see she was on her side with her face buried in a pillow, muffling her sobs. Had she been crying like this every night and I just didn't know it? I felt terrible as I walked towards her and wrapped my arms around her.
“It was so real, like he was here.” She whispered to me.
“I'm so sorry.” I knew what it was like for dreams to be all too real. For myself it was the dream that was horrible, for Emily it was waking up.

“Will you stay?” Emily asked, between sniffles.
“Yeah.” I wanted to help her go back to sleep and maybe she could at least have Sam then. I laid down next to her and held her tightly. For a while she cried into my chest as I rubbed her back, and slowly I could feel her relax into my side. I wished that there was something more that I could do, but I knew that her grieving was just going to take time. It only took me a few more minutes to fall asleep as well.

I was on the beach with Bella and two young girls with long dark hair and beautiful tan skin and an older boy who looked exactly like myself at that age. The girls were collecting small seashells and the boy was waist deep in the water jumping through the small waves that lapped at his body. I was sitting next to Bella and she was filling me in on what the children were doing each day.

Then the same woman from the other dream came walking towards me and I stood up to walk to her. My children came running towards me, one of my girls took each of my hands as my son spoke.
“Fight for us.”
I knelt down putting my arms around both girls. “I'm so sorry.”
“Don't be sorry, Dad,” they said together. “Fight, fight for us.”
I looked down into their innocent eyes, they were just children they shouldn't have to deal with their father leaving them for someone else.

Bella came towards us and the children made room for her to stand before me. My daughters dropped my arms, placing my hands on Bella's waist. I was still on my knees in the sand and Bella placed her hands on my shoulders.
“Fight for me,” she whispered.
“I can't.” I whispered back and my youngest daughter disappeared.
“What about us? Show me you're willing to fight, that I'm still the love of your life.”
“How?” I begged.
“Don't leave me, chasing a dream.”
“I can't.” I whispered again, and my other daughter and son disappeared.

I felt my knees get weak and I wanted to crumble into the sand, but Bella stepped closer holding me up with her body. My arms held tightly to her pressing her into me. “I don't ever want to let you go.”
“Then don't.” Bella said, as she pressed her lips to mine. I kissed her back like I wasn't sure if I would ever kiss her again. My hands were pressed into her back and I could feel her hands sink into my hair pulling us even closer together as our lips melted together. Bella's hands roamed over my chest until she got to the end of my shirt and our mouth only broke a moment while my shirt came over my head.

My hands were everywhere like they were trying to make up for lost time as I went from one curve to the next, up and down her body.
“Jacob, please,” she whispered.
I laid back on the sand, pulling her on top of me as we both began frantically removing what was left of our clothes. Our bodies rubbed together as she kissed down my neck, licking and sucking as she went. My hands trailed up her slim waist, as I lifted her onto myself, slipping inside. Bella released a deep groan as she rocked against me and my hands palmed her round breasts. Our mouthes found each other again and our tongues tangled together, I felt like it would last forever as we rocked against each other until Bella shuttered above me and I released.

Bella collapsed completely breathless against my chest and I kissed across her forehead, cheek, nose, landing on her lips. My arms wrapped around her knowing that I wouldn't be able to let her go again. Then I felt a different hand on my shoulder, keeping my hands on Bella I looked at this other person. She didn't look angry or hurt, but rather confused. I felt like I should apologize, but I wasn't sorry for being with Bella.
“I'm staying with Bella.” I told her.
“Then I will leave.” She replied.
“Wait! Is it that simple?” I asked.

“Yes. By picking Bella, I simply do not exist.”
“Are you saying that I could have always been with Bella?” I asked.
“Life is about choices, Jacob. Choose wisely.”
“I choose Bella. I'll fight if I have to.” With that the other women disappeared, and I looked back at Bella laying across me. I gave Bella a huge kiss, hugging her tightly to me.
Suddenly Bella sat up and morphed into the injured Bella that I saw in Seth's mind with her arm in a sling and I could see tape over her ribs. “Now come to me, Jacob.”

I woke up suddenly and felt like I could hardly breathe. My chest was heaving and everything had felt so real. I could see the early morning light coming through the window. For a moment I couldn't remember where I was or why I had blankets, until I felt someone move next to me. I looked down at my naked chest, and continued to examine myself as I followed my sheet covered arm that was around her waist. I could feel my fingers on her skin as I looked up her body until I saw two eyes staring back at me. If I thought I couldn't breathe before, that was nothing compared to now.
“Why are you looking at me like you don't know me?” Emily asked.
My heart was ramming in my chest as I just continued to stare at her completely speechless. What have I done? I know I was having a dream, but I was so hoping that I didn't actually do anything.
“Why am I here?” I asked, sitting up suddenly, with my back to her. “Did . . . did we . . .”
“Sleep together.” Emily offered.

I couldn't look at her as it felt like eternity passed before I nodded my head. It didn't have anything to do with Emily, she was a great person and I cared about her a lot. But I knew that anything between her and I would have been a mistake. I felt my stomach roll and I thought I was going to be sick.
“No, of course we didn't.” Emily confirmed and I was finally able to look at her. She was dressed in a tank top and cotton shorts.
While I was greatly relieved, I still was not quite convinced that it had only been sleeping. “We didn't kiss or anything?”

“No, why would you think that?”
“I had a dream.”
“Of me?” Emily questioned.
“No, about Bella.”
“I'm sorry.” Emily sat up, patting me on the shoulder. “I have been awake for a little bit. I know that I should have gotten up, but I enjoyed your warmth and you were completely out of it. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable by asking you to stay.”
“That's fine.” I took a deep breath finally able to breathe. As I calmed down, I could remember Emily having a bad dream and laying down with her. At first the blankets were at my feet, later Emily covered herself and me with them. It made me hot, so I took my shirt off.

“Are you alright?” Emily asked.
“Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry I freaked out on you, but I need to go.” We both got out of bed, Emily went to the bathroom while I grabbed my shirt from the floor, and put it on. My shoes were by the door and I grabbed them as well, slipping them on while standing on the front porch. I wasn't staying at Emily's just to avoid my bad dreams and Charlie, I was avoiding my dad as well. I knew that I needed to face him and to tell him about my dreams and see what he has to say.

I ran home and walked in the door to find Dad sitting at the table, drinking his coffee. It didn't take long for me to look around and know that no one else was here.
“Dad, why are you alone?”
“I'm a big boy I can take care of myself.”
“Sure, sure.” I rolled my eyes, as I went to the refrigerator for juice and brought out the loaf of bread for toast. Dad watched me without saying anything as I got some butter and jelly for the toast, and some ham, setting them on the table. While I toasted bread I told him about the dreams that I have had, and skipped over the part that I was with Emily for the second dream. He listened carefully without interrupting me.

“So what do I do?” I asked as I sat down at the table.
“I think you should listen to your dreams.”
“But my dreams seem to indicate that I will imprint.”
“Yes, but they are also telling you to fight for Bella and not your imprint. Even in your dreams you still desire Bella.”
“So you think I should be with Bella, even if I imprint?”
“Yes.”

We were both quiet for a moment while I thought about what he said, and ate my toast. I got up and refilled my cup with juice and my dad's mug with coffee.
“Jacob, I think you are living in fear and it has consumed you. Do you remember me telling you that it is okay to be scared, but you can't let it over take you?”
“Yeah. How do I get past it?”
“Be stronger than fear. Take charge of it instead of allowing it to control you. You are not alone, Jacob.”
“I feel alone. I wish I had your strength.”
“You do have it. Now go, do what you need to do.”

I got up from the table for the first time feeling confident that I could make a decision and stick with it. There was one more person that I wanted to talk to, therefore the moment I was outside, I started running. I made it to the Clearwaters in record time and knocked on their front door.
Leah opened the door. “Seth is perfectly fine, you can go,” she said, before slamming the door in my face.
“Leah, open the door. I need to talk to you.” I said while pounding on the door. To my surprise it was Seth who opened the door.

“What is wrong with her?” I asked Seth when she stormed off up the stairs, slamming her bedroom door.
“She is mad at you.” Seth answered.
“Ya think?” I rolled my eyes, which Seth scowled at. “Jeez, what did I do now?”
“She is mad about you leaving Bella, and just all this crap. Honestly, Jake, we are all a little bit pissed at you. Being with Bella should be worth the risk of something that might not ever happen.” Seth said angrily.
“Well, that is why I am here. I need to talk to Leah.”
“She's upstairs, enter at your own risk.” He said before wondering off towards the kitchen.
“Thanks, buddy,” I mumbled to an empty room.

I walked upstairs to her room and knocked on the door, there was no response, but I faintly could hear music so I cautiously opened the door. Leah's room was pretty normal with cream walls, dark oak desk, dresser, and headboard that matched. Her black and red comforter was stretched across her bed so that it was made, but messy with several decorative pillows on the floor.

Leah was laying across her bed on her stomach and I could see her headphones over her ears. Her ankles were crossed with the top foot bouncing to the beat of whatever she was listening to. Knowing that she was already pissed at me I didn't want to scare her, so I kicked the foot post of her bed.
“Go away.” Leah said, without looking away from the magazine she was flipping through.
“Leah, please, I need to talk to you.”
Leah turned and glared at me. “Then talk,” she said as she went back to completely ignoring me.
“You're not making this very easy.” I grumbled as I sat down on the floor, and put one of her pillows between my back and her dresser.

We were both quiet, but instead of being comfortable it was awkward and strained. Leah continued to ignore me and I tried to pretend it was completely normal for me to be here, but completely failed. There was nothing normal about this at all.
“Never mind, I'm leaving.” I had decided that this was even more stupid, to think that I would get any helpful advice from Leah.
“Jake, wait. What's wrong? Besides the obvious and you just being stupid.”
“I don't want to talk about it.” I stood and was getting ready to walk out her door.
“What? Going back to Emily?”

Her suggestion stopped me from moving. “What does that mean?”
“You are practically living with her.”
“It is not like that.” I said, shaking my head.
“I didn't mean that it was, and if it were that is none of my business. But you shouldn't be doing this to Bella.” Leah rolled over so that she was sitting with her legs crossed under herself.
I came and sat next to her. “I know, I feel like I get close to making a decision to come back to her, but then I would have another dream. That is why I am at Emily's, I'm able to sleep. I hate the idea of hurting Bella.”
“You are already hurting her.”
“This is not the same, and you know it.”

“You are right. It is even worse.”
“Worse?” I couldn't imagine anything worse than what Leah has gone through.
Leah nodded her head. “Yes, the only thing that would have made what Sam did worse would be for him to push me away if he didn't have to. Sam did not have a choice, and you do. You are choosing wrong.”
“And if I imprint?”
“Bella is fully aware of what she is getting herself into to be with you. Don't you think you should be talking to her about this?

I took a deep breath knowing that she was right. “I don't need to talk to Bella, I know what she would do.”
“You are acting like him.”
“What?” I asked.
“Like Edward, doing what you think is best for Bella instead of letting her make her own decisions.”
“I am not. I'm nothing like Edward.”
“You just keep saying that, and it will be him who ends up with Bella.”
I glared at Leah, expecting to see her scowl back, but she just rolled her eyes.

Frustrated and angry I stormed out of the house. There was no way that Leah was right. It was one thing for Bella to move on without me, but with Edward. No way. I had enough trust in Edward to keep her safe and take care of her while she was healing, but for them to actually be back together. I felt goosebumps running across my skin, and it was creepy. I couldn't shake the feeling. While I felt like Leah was not right about Edward and Bella being together, there was something that she was right about.

I was acting just like Edward and I hated it. However there was something that I could do about it, I was going to Bella. We were going to work on this together, like we should have been doing this whole time. I was already in the woods, therefore I exploded into my wolf, and started running towards the Cullen's house.

 

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:29pm

 

 

Chapter 8 - GROVELING

Song: To Make Her Love Me – Rascal Flats

- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vIhxmWhdZ60&feature=autoplay&...


I was acting just like Edward and I hated it. However there was something that I could do about it. I was going to Bella and we were going to work on this together, like we should have been doing this whole time. I was already in the woods and so I exploded into my wolf, and started running.

It wasn't a long run, but it gave me enough time to torture myself with trying to come up with something to say to Bella. Just about everyone had called me stupid, so I think she knew that already. As I approached the Cullen's home Edward was standing on the front porch, I assumed that he heard me coming and would know that I was here to apologize, and tell her how sorry I was.

“Jacob,” he said to me, as he came walking towards me.
I'm sorry. I was going to phase back and realized I didn't have any clothes, and figured that he could listen to my mind.
“You should be.” He said angrily. “You have no idea what it has been like for her, moving around every day constantly looking out the windows waiting for you to come back.”
I needed time, to figure some things out.
“Imprinting,” he said it like it was disgusting. “You should have just let me talk to you.”
Save it, Cullen. I growled.
Edward glared as he took another step forward. “If you ever push her away again, I swear, I will take her.” Edward promised.

“No, you won't.” Bella said from behind him. Edward sighed, then stepped back inside and came back with Bella in his arms. They looked so comfortable together that for a moment I thought maybe Leah was right and Bella had gone back to Edward. Bella looked at Edward and nodded her head my direction, so Edward walked towards me. Suddenly I didn't care about being naked and I phased back, crouching down on the ground.
“Bella . . .” I whispered, looking into her eyes.
Edward set her down and then handed her the crutch so that she could lean on it. I was kneeling so that she was only slightly taller than me. In one solid smack Bella slapped me across the face. I wish that I could say it hurt, but it didn't, at least not physically. However, seeing Bella wince in pain was far worse than any physical pain she could have caused me.
“Jacob Black, do not ever do this again.” Bella demanded.

“I won't, I promise.” I reached out and took the same hand she had slapped me with and her palm was bright red. Taking one long stride closer, I kissed the palm of her hand up to her wrist, pressing my lips gently to the dark scab where she had been bitten and clawed.
“I'm so sorry,” I whispered. “I wish that I could have kept this from happening.”
“I wish that you had too. Now leave.” Bella said calmly, leaning back.
“What? Please, Bells.”

“Don't you dare, 'Bells' me!” She said taking an angry hop back. Tears leaked out of the corner of her eyes, but I could tell that they were angry tears. I looked past her and saw that Edward standing to the side with his hand out, like he was going to catch her if she fell.
“Sorry, um . . . please, I want to explain.” I knew that she had every right to be angry with me, but seeing her so furious was extremely painful.
“You don't need to. I know, you got scared about imprinting because of Paul and Quil.”
“More Quil than Paul.”
“Why? We both already knew that Quil was probably going to imprint.”
“Not on a child, we didn't.”

Bella shook her head. “Regardless, you left me,” she said, taking another hop back.
“I won't do that again.” I promised.
“Unless you imprint, of course.” Bella challenged.
“Actually . . .” Edward started to say.
“Not now, Edward.” Bella looked at him, shaking her head. Edward gave a brief nod and then went inside, however I'm sure he didn't go far.
“No Bella, I'll fight it. If I imprint, I'll fight to be with you.”
Bella rolled her eyes. “Jacob, you ran at the thought of it. You can't possibly promise me that that won't happen again.”
“Yes, I can. Bella, I didn't give imprinting as much thought as I should have. I needed time to think and make some decisions.”

“My decisions,” Bella glared.
“No! MINE. My decisions.” I yelled back, coming closer to her. “I wasn't trying to decide what you should do, I was trying to decide what I should do. This is my mess. Did it ever occur to you, that I didn't want to break your heart? To go back on every promise I have ever made.”
“Didn't you already, when you left?”
I shook my head, feeling so frustrated. “You don't understand what it was like to hold Leah as she completely fell apart. For her to still be in love with a man that she couldn't have. I don't want to be your Sam. You deserve better than that.”

“Did it ever occur to you, that I might think it was worth the risk?”
“Yes, of course.” I never really doubted that Bella would think it was worth the risk, but I came to let her decide that for herself. “I'm here, aren't I?”
“That is not good enough.” Bella said, shaking her head.
“What do you want from me? I am back.” I let me eye plead into her eyes, begging for her to listen to me.
For a moment the anger vanished from her face and I could see the pain and sorrow that she felt as her eyes glistened with tears. “I wish that I could believe that, I really do.”
I came slightly closer to her, taking her hand. “Give me the chance to prove it, please.”

I wasn't sure if I should be touching her at all, but I really wanted to wrap my arms completely around her. Apparently, Bella was thinking the same thing, the next moment her arm was around my neck and I wrapped mine around her waist. I wasn't really sure what parts of her were still injured or sore and I didn't want to hurt her, so I held her gently to myself simply thankful that I was able to touch her. I was a little surprised by how tightly Bella was able to hold on to me. I could feel her relax into my chest and I gladly supported her.

Neither of us spoke for a long time and I rubbed my hands in large circles on her back.
“You are so warm.” Bella whispered, as she sunk further against me.
“I've missed you, Bella.” I pulled back just a little, tucked her hair behind her ears and then rested my hand on her good shoulder. “How are you?” Bella gave me a strange, confused look like I have lost my mind. “I mean with your body.” I gestured with my hands over her collarbone and ribs, I could see the cast on her foot.
“Oh,” Bella groaned. “It sucks. Everything about this is awkward, trying to move around is the worst. I can't wait to be back to normal.”
“Normal, huh?”

Bella laughed and I smiled back at her. “I've missed you, Jake. I want to go home. I don't know where we are right now, but I need your help.”
“I'm here. I'll be wherever you need me to be.”
We gave each other another big hug and then pulled apart. When we separated, next to us I saw a shirt and a pair of shorts, so I slipped them on. I knew I needed to talk to the Cullens and thank them for everything that they have done for Bella. Not just bringing her home, but also taking care of her when I didn't.

“I need to talk to the Cullens.” I told her. Bella simply nodded her head. I started to pick her up and then stopped. “Do you mind?”
“Go ahead.” Bella affirmed.
I scooped her up and walked inside their house. Everything was so white and clean, nothing looked used even the furniture. It smelled horrible to me and I was extremely uncomfortable being here, especially when they were all staring at me from the living room.
“You can set me down on the couch.” I placed her on the corner of the couch and Alice moved the ottoman, lifted Bella's leg and placed her foot on it.
“Make yourself comfortable.” Esme suggested, when she noticed my anxious face.
Like that was going to happen, I thought, but I knew that I couldn't say that so I simply smiled at her and kept my mouth shut. Bella gave her a sweet smile and asked for a glass of water, I was guessing to give her something to do.

Bella settled in easily on the couch next to Jasper, it was obvious that she was very comfortable here. Jasper was right next to Alice and was talking to Emmett, I didn't catch what they were talking about. I stood next to Bella, our hands were intertwined, resting in her lap as she rubbed her thumb across the back of my hand. Her touch was extremely soothing, I'm guessing that Bella would know how difficult it would be for me to be around so many vampires, especially in a confined space. Esme returned with a glass of water for myself and Bella, taking the glass I thanked her and took a drink to not seem rude.

I took a deep sigh, a little louder than I meant to, and it seemed to draw everyone's attention to me. “Um, I wanted to thank you for bringing Bella back. I should have said this when you all first returned.”
“You know we would do anything for Bella.” Alice said, as she reached across Jasper to pat Bella's knee. Bella smiled and rested her hand over Alice's.
“I do know that. I am also thankful that you have taken such good care of her after she came back.”
“You mean when you didn't.” Emmett said and I could see the anger in his eyes.
“Emmett, don't . . .” Bella started to say.
“No,” I interrupted. “I deserve that. Yeah, that is what I mean. But I will not do that again.” I didn't really feel like I owed them a full explanation or promises, but I did want to show that I was serious about my commitment to Bella.

The others were quiet for a few minutes as Edward and I eyed each other, however neither of us said anything. Not speaking gave him a huge advantage because he could see inside my brain, and I swear I saw him smirk slightly. I rolled my eyes, which Bella noticed and squeezed my hand.
“I'm going to gather my things.” Bella said as she used the crutch to stand up and started going towards the staircase.
“Do you need help?” I offered.
“I'll help her.” Alice fluttered quickly after her and I figured that they might want a moment before Bella leaves. Alice lifted Bella and scampered up the stairs.

I asked Carlisle about what I needed to know to take care of her injuries. There wasn't much that needed to be done, it was mostly just waiting. She was still on pain medication, but no prescriptions. She would have to be careful moving her arm because of her collarbone and she was not supposed to get her cast wet. At least I had some experience with that when Victoria caused the car to crash with Bella and Leah inside.

“She gets worn out easier, and sometimes takes something at night before going to sleep.” Edward added.
I tried not to let it bother me that he knew her sleeping pattern and was torn between wanting to know and not wanting to.
“Yes, she has been staying in my room.” Edward confirmed.
“Were you there too?” I asked.
“Yes. You should know by now that if you are not going to be with Bella, than I will be.”
“Any more accidental kisses?” I half joked.
“Unfortunately, no.” He smiled at me, and I wasn't sure if it was a forced, fake smile, but I was guessing that it was.

“You know, Jacob, as weird as this might sound, I think it was really good for Bella and I to have this time together.”
I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from saying the sarcastic response that was on the tip of my tongue.
Edward laughed. “Well, at least you have some control over what comes out of your mouth.”
“I try,”I rolled my eyes. “Why was this good for you?”
“I have always assumed that it was you that kept Bella and I apart. That without you, she would come back to me.”
“I would have thought that as well. That doesn't really explain why Bella being here was good for you.” I added, still confused.

“I suppose it does not. What I am saying is that, I am not a threat to you and Bella.”
“Ummm, interesting. Thank you, Edward.” I can't say that I completely understood what he was trying to tell me, but I appreciated him trying to explain it to me. “I really did mean it when I said that I will not push her away again.”
“I know. I just wish that you had let me talk to you.” Edward said seriously.
“I wouldn't have listened.”
“You are pretty stubborn like that.”
I shrugged. “I'm not the only one, you know.”

Edward opened his mouth to say something, but we could both hear Bella's loud crutch, slamming into everything, but the floor. We looked at each other and smiled, I think we both knew how stubborn Bella could be. The fact that Bella was trying to get around on her own in a house full of strong vampires proved the point nicely.
“Well, good luck, Jacob.”
How much groveling do I need to do? I thought to Edward.
“Lots, of course.” Edward whispered.
Of course. I took a deep breath, cringing from the smell.
Alice carried Bella down the stairs, looking at Edward and I cautiously. I'm not sure if she thought we would try to hurt each other, but it was good for us to have a moment to talk to each other. There was a large suitcase in Alice's hand and I took it from her, as she set Bella back down and helped to position the crutch for Bella. I was going to put the suitcase in my car until I realized that I didn't exactly arrive here on two legs, or four wheels for that matter.

“Would you like a ride home?” Edward asked. “Or you are welcome to borrow a car.”
As tempting as it would be to drive one of the Cullen's cars it didn't feel like the right time for a joy ride. “How about I borrow a car another time.” I suggested.
“Alright.” Edward agreed.
“Lets get me home.” Bella said, and I could still hear the irritation in her voice. It was going to take some work on my part, but I was ready.

Bella hobbled awkwardly and I followed her because I wasn't sure where we were going. She gave hugs to each of the Cullens, thanking them and promising to see them soon. We went around the kitchen to the side door, into the garage. It was like car heaven in here, so I walked slowly each one more amazing than the next. There was a black BMW that was completely smashed and I figured that it must have been the car used for Bella's “car accident” cover story.

“Would you like for me to look at fixing it?” I asked. I wasn't really sure where I would put it with the Rabbit and Bella's truck taking up my entire garage.
“It is Rosalie's car and she is pretty good, but I will pass the offer along.” Edward said as he walked over to his silver Volvo. I placed Bella's suitcase in the trunk, as Alice helped Bella into the back seat, then gave her a huge hug. I got in the back seat, placed the seatbelt around Bella, clicking it into place before Edward drove us home.

In no time we pulled up to Bella's house and I was relieved that Charlie's cruiser wasn't there, I wasn't quite ready to face him.
I got out of the back seat and Edward got her suitcase, which I took from him. “I'll take this inside, and give you guys a moment.”
“You don't have to leave.” Edward said.
“I'm not, I'm just going inside.” I turned to Bella and got her keys from her. “Take your time.” I felt like the least I could do was let them say goodbye to each other privately.

I went inside the house, placing the suitcase in the laundry room. I made a quick phone call to Dad telling him I was here, he was glad and told me to take my time coming home. Paul and Rachel were there so it wasn't a problem. I thought I would do what I could to make being home as comfortable for her as possible. There were a few dishes in the sink and the floor could use vacuuming. As I started to fill the sink I could hear Bella's crutch beating the porch, so I went and opened the front door.
“Bella, do you want help?” She was fighting with the one step that they had leading to the porch.
“Yes.” Bella answered with a sigh.
I lifted her up, carrying her inside. “Do you want to be in the living room or the kitchen?”
“Living room.”
I placed her on the couch, grabbed a kitchen chair to place her foot on and handed her the remote for the TV, before going back into the kitchen.
“What are you doing in there?” Bella called.
“Dishes, just give me a sec.”

I knew how much Bella appreciated having her space be clean and I thought that it would be the least I could in making her feel more comfortable. It didn't take long to finish up the dishes, then I vacuumed and started some laundry for Bella. I didn't want to seem ungrateful that one of them gave me some clothes to wear, but they really stunk so I took the shirt off, throwing it in the washing machine with Bella's clothes. I settled on the other side of the couch and we tried to talk, but it was strained and uncomfortable. Slowly, the more we talked it became more comfortable.

“Hey Bells,” I froze when I called her that not sure if she would be angry about it.
“Yeah?”
“Are you hungry? I was going to get something to eat.”
“Sure, sure.” I couldn't help smirking at her using my phrase. She saw and reached over, smacking my shoulder. “For that, you are making dinner.”
“What?” I gave a fake, shocked expression. “Did you expect to make dinner on one leg?”
“I could.” Bella challenged.
“Sure, sure.” I smirked at her and she laughed.

I switched her clothes over to the dryer and started another load before I made some sandwiches. I placed two on a plate for Bella and three for myself.
“Hey Bella, what does Charlie know about what happened? I mean, I know about the car accident story, but what about why you have been with the Cullens for so long.” I asked, joining her back on the couch.
“Honestly, with Alice helping me to shower and get dressed I said it was just easier to get ready there. That made sense to him and I would talk to him on the phone often.”
“Thanks for not throwing me under the bus with Charlie.”
“It is the least I could do.”

“That is an understatement, and you know it, Bells. There are a lot of things that you could have done.”
Bella half shrugged with her good shoulder. “He also knew that you had things that you needed to take care of with Sam's death.” Bella looked sad for a moment. “I wish that I had been here for that.”
“That would have been great. I missed you so much.” I gave her most of the details of the funeral, including being chief.
“Wow, you're chief.”
“Yeah, I'm not really sure what that means for me right now.”
“Chief Jacob.” Bella smiled.
I rolled my eyes. “You're such a dork.”

We went to the kitchen and I began to gather things for dinner. I had made lasagna before with Bella's help, so it seemed like something we could do together. We chatted easily, however it was obvious that we were avoiding the main things we needed to talk about. It seemed that she really did have a good time with the Cullens, telling me about what she did with them. It wasn't much due to her being so uncomfortable and slept a lot from the prescription pain medication. She watched a lot of movies, spent time outside on the front porch or would be carried for a “walk”, and Edward would read out loud or play the piano. I could tell that her and Edward really did have a good friendship and I began to understand what he was trying to say about it being good for them to have this time together.

Once dinner was in the oven, we settled comfortably on the couch, flipping on the TV to help pass the time. Bella relaxed on her back and I placed her feet in my lap, massaging her calves and her good foot, while Bella closed her eyes relaxing. She looked so peaceful that after awhile I rested next to her with my head on her chest. I could feel it rise and fall as she breathed deeply, my hand wandered aimlessly over her stomach and hip as she ran her fingers through my hair. It felt really good and soon I felt Bella's hand still and her rhythmic breathing indicated that she was asleep. I looked up at her beautiful face and couldn't believe that she had taken me back.
“I'm so sorry,” I whispered. Very lightly I kissed her lips and then I settled my head back on her chest, wrapping my arms round her, and went to sleep.

I woke up to the house smelling really great, but something else didn't smell good. I turned my head, realizing that it was Bella I was smelling, she still smelled like them on her clothes. I also could feel someone staring and lifted my eyes to see Charlie standing over me, clearly not happy. I followed his glare to my hand that was resting over Bella's breast and immediately raised my hand.
“Um . . . uh, sorry. I honestly didn't mean to.” I awkwardly disentangled myself from Bella so that I was sitting next to her, she stayed asleep.
“Normally it is good to see you, Jacob.”
“Yeah, it is good to be back. You'll have to get use to seeing me with Bella . . . I mean not like you did earlier . . . with me touching her . . . but just where I am where she is . . . we are . . .”
“Shut up, Jacob.”

Immediately, I shut my mouth, which Charlie started laughing at.
“You are acting like you can't have a life outside of Bella or her have one outside of you.”
“Isn't that how it is suppose to be?” I asked.
“Look, I will never compare her relationship to you and to hers with Edward, however I never liked how Bella got so wrapped up in the Cullens that she forgot about everyone else. As much as I like you and Bella together, I do not want that to happen. You need to be able to breathe, and it not be down each other's neck.”
“Really? I'm quite fond of Bella's neck.” I leaned over and kissed the side of her neck, next to her shoulder.
“Jake,” Charlie shook his head, his voice a slight warning.
I smiled at him. “Sorry, I couldn't help it.”

Charlie rolled his eyes, mumbling about young love and being a teenager. I got up and checked on dinner that was in the oven, it was getting brown on top so I turned the oven off and left it there. Then I switched over Bella's clothes to the dryer and started the next load. Returning to the couch, I placed Bella's legs back in my lap and took her hand that was resting across her stomach, rubbing my thumb across the back of her hand. Charlie and I stayed comfortably silent until Bella woke up. She stretched lazily, smiling at me.
“Hey, beautiful.” I said, causing her to blush. I took her hands, helping her to sit up and Bella leaned against my side.
“Hey,” she whispered as she lightly pressed her lips to mine. I kissed her back gently, caressing her cheek with my hand, resting my forehead against hers when we pulled apart. Despite the kiss being brief, it felt fantastic to have my lips touch hers.
“I love you, Bella.” I whispered to her.

“Love you, too.” She gave a weak smile and it looked like she was hurting. I got her some more pain medication from the upstairs bathroom and a glass of water before getting everything finished for dinner. We had a quiet dinner between the three of us, as things were starting to feel back to normal. Charlie went back to the living room, I washed the dishes, while Bella chatted as she folded some of her laundry. I knew that it was time for me to head to my own house, but I didn't want to leave Bella's side. It crossed my mind to just stay here, but I knew that I needed to go home.

As I was drying the last dish, Bella hobbled towards me, wrapped her arms around my waist, hugging me from behind. I took a deep breath and let myself relax back into her body, as her head rested between my shoulder blades.
“I love you, Jake,” she said softly, “but . . . sometimes I don't like you very much.”
“I know, we need to talk this out.” I could feel her nod her head. Slowly I turned around so that she was against my chest, and wrapped my arms around her back. “Can you come home with me? Or would you rather be in your own bed?”
“I want to be with you, wherever that happens to be.” Bella tried to lift up on her toes, but it was hard with one foot, so I lifted her off the ground bringing our lips together.

 

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:39pm

Song: Jesse McCartney – Take Your Sweet Time

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCqlTvmgXMQ&feature=BFa&list...


Chapter 9 – CATCHING UP

We kissed slowly, our tongues caressing together, deepening the kiss. I sighed against her lips as I smoothed out some of her hair, giving her a hug before shifting her slightly in my arms. “Can I get you anything?” I asked her.
“Pain meds, upstairs in the bathroom.” I already knew that was where they were, so I thought that was a little strange that she was so specific. I went towards the couch to set her down when Bella shook her head.
“What?” I asked, confused.
She leaned forward, whispering in my ear. “I need to go . . . ya know . . . to the bathroom.”
“Oh, um . . . okay.” Well, this could get interesting. I grabbed her crutch, and carried her upstairs, placing her back on her foot inside the bathroom. Bella was wearing a denim dress, so I hoped that would make this a little easier. “Do I need to do anything?”

“No, Alice has loaded me up on dresses.” Bella smiled. “She was thrilled to have the excuse to buy me clothes”
“I noticed when I washed your clothes.”
“Thank you for that. Oh, I should have thought of this earlier, I bet I need to change clothes. I probably really stink to you.”
“Yeah,” I shrugged, it was always weird when I confirmed that she stunk, even if it was her that suggested it in the first place. “I'll get you something.”
“Give me a few minutes.”
“Alright, just yell when you're ready and I'll come back.” I went to her room and got her one of her favorite flannel shirts and loose cotton shorts. As I was waiting, I began to get nervous. It wasn't like I have never seen Bella in her underwear, or less, but it felt different.

I heard Bella call to me so I went back into the bathroom. She was leaning against the sink, her sling was off, lying across the counter, as she unbuttoned her dress with one hand. I closed the door behind me and stood there waiting for her to tell me what to do.
“Do you know what this reminds me of?” Bella said.
I shook my head. “Nope, what?”
“When I fainted in the shower and you were trying to figure out how to get me dressed.”
“I remember.” I smiled, thinking about that. “Honestly, it feels a lot like that.”

Bella turned slowly towards me, taking my hand in hers. “What has happened to us?”
I shook my head. “I freaked out, and messed up.”
“What do you mean?” Bella asked, looking very concerned.
“I should have been with you. I just couldn't.”
“Why?”
“I can't be objective and be with you at the same time.” I ran my hand through my hair, taking a deep breath. “It didn't help that I was having terrible dreams with me imprinted and breaking your heart.”

Bella finished unbuttoning her dress and stood on her one leg. I took a step towards her, placing my hand at the small of her back, as I helped to take it off. There were slight bruises over her shoulder and other places where she had been hit. It made me feel terrible and as much as I wanted to take back being away from her, I knew that I needed that time. I could see Bella was thinking about why I was away as I put her shirt on her, buttoned it up, then placed her sling back on. To get her shorts on her, I lifted her to sit on the counter taking one side of the shorts over her cast and then over her other leg as well.

“I wondered why it took you so long to come back.” Bella said softly, looking down at the floor.
“Bella . . .” I brought my finger under her chin to lift her eyes to mine. She was still sitting on the counter and I placed my hand just above her knees. “Bella, I was dreaming every night, so that I hated going to sleep. So I stayed up later and later, hoping the dream wouldn't come, but it still did. I was a complete ass to everyone, with the exception of Emily. One evening I fell asleep on Emily's couch, despite being small and uncomfortable, it was the best sleep I had. So I stayed there, on her couch, until last night.”

Bella stayed quiet, it had started to rain with big fat drops splattering against the side of the house. I decided it was time for us to get out of the bathroom, so I opened the door and lifted Bella into my arms. “Do you want to go downstairs or to your room?”
“My room.” Bella answered, with a yawn. I carried her, placing her on her bed and leaned her crutch against the wall by the bed. Bella laid down on her back, propping her pillow behind her head. I sat down at the end of her bed, resting my back against the wall.
“How is Emily doing?” Bella asked.
“Some days are better than others. Last night was pretty bad.”
“Last night? That is the second time you have said that.” Bella looked at me confused.

It wasn't easy, but I told her everything about staying with Emily and the last dream I had. Bella cried when I told her about seeing our children, and watching them disappear before I made the decision to stay and fight for her. I blushed when I told her about making love to her in my dream, and it was really awkward explaining how I panicked when I woke up next to Emily.
“Nothing happened with Emily, it was only a dream. I promise.”

“I believe you.” Bella said, nodding her head. “Thank you for telling me all that. So where does that leave us?”
I moved closer to her, placing my hand on her hip. “It leaves us to do what I should have done in the first place, to talk to each other, as a couple. I want to go check in with my dad and Emily, and then I can come back and continue to talk this out.” I leaned over, giving Bella a gentle hug and kissed the side of her head.
Bella hugged me back while taking a deep breath. “That sounds good.”

Wrapped in each other's arms I couldn't quite get myself to leave, until I heard the springs of Charlie's chair squeak. I leaned back and nodded my head towards the door. “Your dad is getting up, you going to be alright until I come back. I was planning to stay in my own house, but I really want to be with you.”
“Yes, I'll be fine. Just don't be surprised if I am asleep.”
I ran the back of my finger across her cheek to her chin. “Alright, I'll be back soon.”
I handed her a book to be able to read until she was ready to sleep, grabbed the keys to the Hummer, setting on top of her desk, and went downstairs. I talked to Charlie telling him that I had some things to check on and that I would be back. Charlie nodded his head at me, as he grabbed a beer. I walked out the door, hearing him settle back down on the couch.

It was still raining outside as I jogged over to the Hummer and jumped inside. It was quiet being by myself and so I flicked on the radio, not caring what I listened to, anything was better than the silence. I had so much stuff I was still trying to figure out and it was all becoming so real. Bella and I were back together, but we still had some major issues that we needed to cover. I began to think about my time away from Bella and remembered that I left Emily pretty awkwardly this morning and decided to go there first.

As I pulled up to her house, I saw Hannah's car, Emily's sister, parked in front of the house and I was glad that she hasn't been by herself all day. I got out of the car and walked inside. Hannah was standing at the sink washing dishes and I could hear Emily in her room.
“Emily?” I called.
“Jacob Black, where the hell have you been?” Emily yelled from her room.
I looked at Hannah guiltily and she didn't say anything. “Help me out, here,” I whispered to her.
She shook her head. “No way,” she whispered back.
I sighed as I rolled my eyes.

I went to Emily's room and knocked even though the door was open.
“Come in, Jacob.” I walked in nervously, I knew that I was in trouble. She was in her bed with a large t-shirt on and the blankets covering her waist and legs. Emily curled her legs under herself and I sat down on the end of her bed as Emily was speaking. “I called around checking on you, so I know you went home and visited Leah. Then no one saw you after that. A few of the guys phased to see if you were wolfing out.” Emily ranted.
“No, I went to see Bella.”
Then she slapped me in the shoulder. “Why didn't you say you were going there?”
“I'm sorry, Emily, I didn't mean to be gone all day. I lost track of time. Also about this morning, I didn't mean to leave like I did. It wasn't you, it was me.” I laughed and wiped my hands over my face.
Emily laughed. “I'm sure every person has heard that at least once in their life.”
I shook my head, a little embarrassed. “You know what I mean, right?”
“I get that it wasn't me, but I don't get why it was you. What happened?”

I told her about my last dream and how I had decided that I needed to talk to Dad and also to Leah. Emily stayed quiet and listened, however smiled when I told her that I went to see Bella and brought her back to her house.
“Good for you, Jacob. How is Bella?”
“She is messed up, but she will get better. She can't go up or down the stairs on her own so I'll be there for a while.”
“How did she take you being gone?” Emily asked.
“Of course she was mad at first, which she had every right to be. However, it is getting better.”
“I'm glad.”
“Me too.”

We were both quiet for a little bit. “Jacob, you said that your dreams were telling you to fight the imprint, if you do.” Emily stated.
“Yeah?” I questioned.
“Do you think Sam should have?”
I moved closer to her, taking her hand. “I can't answer that. Mostly because I am not Sam.”
“But you have seen inside his head.” Emily insisted.
“True, but that doesn't really help because Sam never thought of trying to fight it. No one has, so it is completely unknown. Regardless, I'm glad that he didn't fight it, because I like that I know you.”
“Thanks, Jacob, you're not so bad yourself.” Emily teased. “It is a crazy world that Sam brought me into, but I am glad that he did.”

I leaned forward right as Emily did and we hugged each other, with her head leaning on my shoulder. “Are you going to be okay?” I asked her.
“I will be, because I have to be.” Emily murmured as her hand rubbed across her stomach. I wasn't sure if she was aware that she touched her stomach often. I never knew if it felt different to her or if it was simply a gesture that she picked up from being pregnant.
“I'll be here as much as I can.”
“Be with Bella, that is where you should be. I have my family.”

“Speaking of, do you mind if I call Leah to stay with you for a little while. I understand you may want to be alone, but I want someone to be here as much as possible.”
“Thanks, Jake. You've been really great to me.”
“Well, if I haven't said it before, I really care about you. Even without fur, you are part of my pack and we take care of each other.”
Emily chuckled, and I felt like it was time for me to go. I gave her another hug and kissed her temple before using her phone to call Leah.

At first Leah was still pissed at me until I told her that I was back with Bella. She calmed down immediately, so I was able to ask if she was willing to stay with Emily for a while, which Leah did agree to. I gave that information to Emily and then I drove over to my own home. It was getting late and when I walked in Rachel and Paul were sitting on the couch watching a movie. I acknowledged them and walked to Dad's room. Just about everyone in the pack has helped Dad get ready for bed at least once and so it didn't surprise me that Paul was able to get him comfortably in bed. Dad had his TV on and was watching sports.

“I'm glad that you went to Bella.” Dad commented.
“Yeah, me too. I can't believe I was so stupid to think that I couldn't be with her.”
“Does she know about your dreams?”
“Yes, I told her.”
“I'm proud of you, Jacob.” He surprised me by saying.
“I haven't done anything to be proud of lately.”
“That is not true. Leaving Bella was a mistake, but you're not hiding behind that mistake. You are facing it and taking responsibility for what you did.”

“I'm done running away.” I promised. “I know that Bella and I still have things we need to talk about, but we will do it together. Unless she decides that imprinting is too big of a risk.”
“Do you think she will?” Dad asked.
“No, I think she will stay with me. If I didn't know that before, the fact she took me back now proves it.”
“I see what you mean.” Dad said, nodding his head.

“Are you doing alright, Dad?” He gave me a confused look. “It is still going to be several weeks for Bella to get to a point where she can move without destroying the place with her one crutch.” Dad chuckled and I couldn't help smiling as I thought about everything that gets maimed or destroyed in her wake. “So I was going to stay at Bella's for a while. As long as you are okay.”
“You worry too much, Jacob. I am not your responsibility.”
“I'm sorry, I don't mean to get like that.”
“Do what you need to do son, I'll be fine.”
“Thanks.”

I went back to Bella's and the place was quiet, but the front door was unlocked so I knew that Charlie was expecting me back. I looked at the couch expecting to see a pillow and blanket there, but that wasn't the case so I went upstairs to Bella's room. She was sprawled diagonal across her bed, lying on her back, therefore I grabbed my pillow and spread out over the floor. The couch would be softer, but would be cramped for space and this way I could be available to help Bella if she needed to get up during the night.

I woke up the next morning to Bella's moans and I could tell that she was really uncomfortable, therefore I rolled onto my knees at the side of her bed.
“Bells, what can I do?” I asked, taking her hand.
“Help me to the bathroom.” Bella's face scrunched in pain as I lifted her up and carried her to the bathroom. I got her pants off so she could use the restroom and stepped out so that I could get a glass of water for her to take her pain meds. I waited for a moment downstairs, and decided to grab some Pop Tarts, heating them in the toasted. While I waited, I looked out the window, noticing that Charlie's cruiser was gone, before I went back up to the bathroom, carrying the Pop Tarts in a napkin.

“I wish I could take a bath.” Bella said swallowing her meds.
“Can you hang your foot out and still sit comfortably inside?”
“Yeah, I guess. Are you okay with helping me with all this?” Bella asked, loosening the sling so that she could take it off.
“Would you rather me get your dad?” The look of complete horror on Bella's face was absolutely priceless. “That is what I thought.” I said laughing.
Bella scowled and rolled her eyes as she unbuttoned her shirt. “That was mean.”
“Yeah,” I grinned, “but totally worth it. Besides he isn't here.”
Bella smiled, as she shook her head. “What am I going to do with you?”

“I can think of a few things.” I teased and raised my eye brows suggestively, as I plugged the drain and turned the water on. Bella suppressed a giggle, instead mentioning that there were some bubbles in the cabinet and I added a large dollop, not really sure how much I was supposed to use, swirling it with my hand to mix it with the water. “It is not like I have never seen you naked. Just don't get mad at me for enjoying it more than I probably should.”
“Pervert.”
“Why don't I get naked and see how well you do at not ogling me.” I smirked.
“Okay, point taken.”
I smiled as I took her shirt and bra off, then had her test the water to see if she liked the temperature. Seeing Bella completely naked was amazing and even better to feel her body as I lifted her up holding her bridal style, lowering her into the water. There was a thick layer of bubbles and they gave a warm vanilla scent to the room. Her cast hung over the side and I sat down resting her foot on top of my raised knees.

“Are you comfortable?” I asked.
“Yeah, this is great. Thank you.”
“No problem.” I grabbed the Pop Tarts from the counter and leaned my back against the wall, resting my arm along the side of the tub.
I handed one to Bella and we ate in silence. Once Bella finished hers, I offered her another but she shook her head as she raised her arm, interlacing our fingers together. “Jake, yesterday morning, what did you do after leaving Emily's?”
“I went to my dad and then to Leah, before coming to you.”
“Why Leah?”

“I felt like she could offer the perspective on imprinting that I needed, but didn't want to hear. She is the one that got thrown aside and my greatest fear has always been that that would be you.” I watched Bella's face as I continued to tell her about my conversation with Leah. Sometimes Bella would smile at Leah being Leah, and other times she would bite down on her bottom lip and frown, possibly sad for what Leah has experienced. It was clear that this was the dark side of imprinting, and it was important that we talk about it.
“So Leah saying that what you were doing was worse than what Sam did, is that what made you come back?”
“Sort of. She also said that I was acting just like Edward and if I didn't get my ass over there that Edward would have you instead of me.”

“So this is all about Edward?”
“No, not all.”
“Jake . . .” Bella said, in disbelief.
“Okay, well maybe a little bit. Leah was right about me acting like Edward, and I didn't like that at all. Edward left you because he thought it was best for you, and I left to try and figure out if leaving was best for you.”
“So what did you decide?”
“You need to know that I think I might imprint, I can't any longer deny that it could happen. However, I also plan to fight it with everything I have. I will pick you.”
“Easy for you to say, you haven't imprinted.”
“I know, which is why you need to really think about if you want to risk being with me.”

Bella nodded her head and frowned, shifting a little in the water which caused it to ripple across the surface. Bella added soap to her wash cloth, using it to wash her body and I washed her hair and what parts she couldn't reach with one hand. Then I lifted her out of the water, quickly wrapping her in a towel, patting her dry. I carried her to her room and sat her on the bed while I went to the closet and dresser for her clothes, getting her dressed.

“Bells, there is one more thing to think about.” I said, sitting down next to her on the bed.
“What is that?”
“I told my dad about the dreams and he pointed out that even when I was imprinted, I still wanted you. I don't know how much truth is in the dreams, but when I picked you my imprint left saying that she wouldn't exist as long as I was with you.”
“I wish that there was a way to hold her to that promise.” Bella murmured.
“I do too. I have no idea what she meant by that, but I trust her.”
Bella nodded her head leaning over so that her head rested against my shoulder, and I tilted my head down against hers.

Bella and I spent the next several days pretty quiet. We watched a ton of movies, laughing and kissing each other, however we could both feel that it wasn't really settled. I was fine with being patient, I simply asked that she let me stay and be with her. She agreed, so that is what I did. At first Bella felt bad about me sleeping on the floor, but I told her that it wasn't a problem. It gave us the space that we needed to start rebuilding our relationship.

One night she had a terrible nightmare about her time with Victoria, her entire body was shaking, mumbling about being so cold. I laid down next to her and she completely melted into my body. The following morning she told me more about the torture that she experienced with Victoria and asked that I start sleeping with her at night. By this time Bella did not have much pain so I felt confident that I wouldn't hurt her in our sleep, therefore I moved to her bed. It was so great to be able to hold her in my arms and kiss her deeply.

I went to La Push often to check in with Dad and Emily, which were both doing fine. I usually went when Bella was taking a nap in the afternoon or sometimes when she went to bed early.
“Hey, Jake, I would like to come with you this time.” Bella said, stretching from the couch.
“That would be great. Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am so ready to get out of the house. I don't care where you are going, I just want to go.”
“As you wish.” I scooped her up, kissing her softly as I carried her to the Hummer, placing her inside. Bella threw her crutch in the back seat as I got in the driver's seat. We chatted easily or listened to the radio as I drove. We pulled up to Emily's house and I walked slowly with Bella as she hopped herself inside.

“Hey, Emily, I brought company.” I smiled at her as she was doing something at the kitchen sink.
Emily looked up and smiled brightly. “Bella!” She yelled as she grabbed a hand towel to dry her hands and came over towards us, giving Bella a big hug.
“Sorry, he was being such an idiot,” Emily said to Bella.
“Hey,” I scowled at Emily and Bella chuckled at us.
“Everyone tried to get him to go back to you, so I'm glad that he did.” Emily continued.
“Speaking of everyone, what do you think of having a bonfire tomorrow night?” I asked her. “Summer is about half over and we really haven't all done anything together.”

“Sure, I'll put some food together.” Emily offered.
“I'll help you,” Bella volunteered. Emily and Bella started talking about food and what they would make with ingredients in the house or the garden that Emily maintained. I told them I would go to the store if anything needed to be bought. Emily agreed to spread the word about the get together, just about everyone came by here at least once throughout the day.
“Emily, I'm really sorry about Sam,” Bella said sadly. “I wish that Victoria's pursuit of me hadn't caused Sam to die.” I hadn't thought of Bella blaming herself for Sam's death. Even though it was wrong for Bella to do that I understood how she felt.
I started to say something to make Bella feel better when Emily shook her head as she took Bella's hand. “Thank you Bella, however you are not responsible for what others do.”

Bella and I stayed a little longer chatting with Emily, and then made our exit. Dad was clearly pleased to see Bella as he gave her a hug, even Paul seemed to be happy for us. Rachel and Bella had a lot more to talk about now that Rachel knew the secret and they seemed to be getting along well. I leaned against the living room wall, watching all the interactions going on around me until Bella smiled and reached her hand towards me. Paul and Rachel had been sitting on the couch when Bella joined them. I propped her foot on a kitchen chair and I sat down on the floor, resting my arm across Bella's knees. We started a movie and I leaned my head in Bella's lap, hugging her legs to my chest as she rested her arm across my shoulders.

Rachel has worked it out with her job for her to work from home, which is how we got high speed Internet in the house. We also had to put her room back together. It took some work getting Dad's carving things out and into his own room. Paul, Rachel, Kim and Jared borrowed a truck and trailer to get most of Rachel's things and bring them here. Rachel has never said if being home is still difficult because of the house reminding her of Mom, but maybe being away has made coming back easier.

When the movie was over Dad rolled himself to his room and I told him I would be there in a minute. Both Rachel and Bella were asleep, I picked up Bella prepared to take her to my room, when Paul stopped me.
“Hey, Jake.”
“Yeah?”
“I really hope that you don't imprint.”
“Thanks, me too.”
Paul picked up Rachel. “Do you mind if I stay with her?” Paul asked. They were certainly a couple, but seemed to be taking things slow. Paul either slept on the couch or went to his own house and I have only caught them kissing a few times. I don't know if that is for my benefit or Rachel's idea, but either way I was thankful.

“You are asking me if you can sleep with my sister. I don't think so.” I laughed.
Paul rolled his eyes. “I won't do anything.”
“Sure, sure.” I shook my head.
“I promise.”
“Paul, I believe that you mean that, but she is your imprint. Thats . . . different.”
“I know.” Paul said lovingly as he looked at Rachel in his arms. I have to admit it was weird seeing him with Rachel. He really was a completely different person with her.

I took a deep breath, him staying most likely wouldn't be any different than Bella staying with me, but I just couldn't get over that Rachel was my sister. “Have you and Rachel talked about you staying before?” I asked awkwardly.
“Not in a while.” Paul answered.
“Then I say no, and talk to Rachel about it. Regardless of whatever she decides, if I ever see or hear you doing anything to her I will make life miserable for you. Clear?”
“Crystal.” Paul nodded his head and carried Rachel to her room and I carried Bella to my own.

I laid Bella across the bed, as she sighed against her pillow and rolled over to her side. I got Dad ready for bed and gave Charlie a call to let him know that Bella and I wouldn't be coming there tonight, staying at my house for the night. Afterwards, I took a quick shower and then crawled into bed with Bella. It has been a while since I have been in my own bed and it felt fantastic. I tucked myself around Bella, she smelled so wonderful as I kissed her hair, wrapped my arms around her, and went to sleep.

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 12, 2011 at 11:42pm

Song: My Best Friend by Tim McGraw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aDm2AIw7Myo&feature=related

Chapter 10 – Bonding

“Here Jake, there are three more.” Bella said, stacking the large plastic storage containers in my already filled arms, so that the large stack completely covered my face and I couldn't even see where I was going.
“Jeez Bells, I really think that you and Emily outdid yourselves with all this food.” There were multiple containers of BBQ chicken, pulled pork, sausage links, corn on the cob, baked beans, carrots, and potato salad .
“You're welcome.” Bella said, reaching up on her toes to kiss the side of my neck. “I think I was just overly excited because I was able to get rid of that horrible cast.” She looked down at the black walking boot that she wore. “This is far better.”

“I'm just glad that you were able to get ride of the crutch.” I added.
“Yeah, I totally agree. But, I should have taken the opportunity to smack you over the head with it, once I didn't need it anymore.”
“Hey, that is not nice.” I scowled, even though I assumed that she was teasing from the light chuckle she gave, but I couldn't see her face from all the containers.
Raising up from being crouched down so that Bella could load up my arms with food, I waited for her to be ready to walk to the beach.

I had forgotten about her doctor appointment until she reminded me this morning. I wasn't excited about going back to the Cullens again, but the trade off of her being able to walk on her own was well worth it. Her arm was still in a sling, but that was mostly just to keep her shoulder still, it didn't actually hurt her anymore. I could hug her and squeeze her tightly without having to worry about hurting her.

We continued the same banter as I carried the containers and Bella carried bags filled with chips and buns. Emily followed us with liters of soda and would chuckle or add her own comments as well. It had rained off and on throughout the day, but it seems that it has decided to stop. Big puffy clouds filled the sky and the sunlight reflected off them giving a fantastic sunset.

Everyone has been really busy this summer and we were all looking forward to having this opportunity to hang out and be together. Sam had started a small construction company with Jared's dad, trying to fix up the reservation and Paul and Jared worked there. Embry and Jackie have been working at the resort, Seth, Colin, and Brady were simply enjoying their summer with friends and whatever else they wanted to do. Leah assisted her mom learning more about the medical field that she wanted to go into. Quil has spent most of his time with Claire and her older sister, Anna, while their mother spent time with Emily. Patrols were down to a few hours each evening with two wolves patrolling at one time, which worked well, giving everyone the chance to let their wolf relax and run free.

< Flashback >

Two weeks after the funeral I phased with Quil and was able to get a better understanding of his imprinting with Claire. For him it happened right before the funeral when Rachel drove Dad and Seth over and Emily's family followed Rachel. Quil was getting Seth out of the car and almost dropped him when he saw Claire in the backseat of the other car. Not knowing that he could imprint on a child he just thought she was sweet and didn't realize it was different until he couldn't stop thinking about her throughout the remaining funeral.

I was surprised by the intensity in his connection to her. Quil was right about it being innocent and there was not any type of sexual desire, in its place was a protectiveness that was extreme. Claire and Anna were playing on the beach and a young man didn't see Claire, tripping over her and knocked her down. I thought for a moment that Quil might kill him. Seth happened to be there as well and apologized to the man for Quil, helped Quil to see it was an accident, and that Claire was fine with only a scraped knee. Quil wrapped Claire in his arms and in that moment they both calmed down, it was amazing how their emotions affected one another.

After Quil shared that with me I wanted to have a council meeting to figure out what should be done. I wasn't sure if we were going to be telling Claire's parents, but I wanted to have a plan in place so Old Quil, Dad, Sue, Quil, and myself gathered at my house to discuss it.
“Quil, what do you want us to do?” I asked him.
“I have been going to the resort to see Claire. I think they think that I am just helping by watching her and Anna so that their mom can be with Emily. Which is basically true.” Quil answered.
“I know that it has been helpful for Emily to have Hannah with her. Emily and I are doing everything that we can to put any concerns that she may have to rest.” Sue added.

“Do they think it is weird that you are there?” Dad asked Quil.
“I don't think so, just that I like kids. Claire has the best friend in the world, what is not to like?” Quil shrugged. “But, they are leaving soon.”
“What about when she goes home?” Old Quil asked.
“That is when it might get strange for them. I will probably just run there to visit, because I don't have a car.” Quil answered.
“Do you feel like you need to see her every day?” I asked.
“Probably not every day, but often. I don't think I will know how often until I'm away from her and see how that goes.”
“I really do not think they need to know anything right now. Let's see how often Quil really does need to see Claire and if her parents get concerned then we can talk to them.” Sue said.
We all agreed that it was fine for Claire's parents to know the truth, when the time comes. We simply wouldn't say anything until a noticeable problem presented itself.

< End Flashback >

As we approached the bonfire, I heard warm greetings around me.
“Kneel down, Jacob, I can't reach.” I heard Emily say and I crouched down so that she could start removing the containers from my arms, arranging them for serving.
I turned around to see Quil lift Bella by her hips and twirled her around in a circle. Bella laughed and put her arm around his neck, giving him a hug. I chatted with Embry and Jackie while Bella and Quil continued to tease each other.

“You know Quil, you can put me down.” Bella suggested.
“What? And endanger all the nice people who came to the beach.” Quil reasoned.
Bella rolled her eyes. “What am I going to do, step on them with my steal toe boot?” Bella swung her leg, hitting Quil in the back of the knee.
“Not nice, Swan.” Quil shifted her, his fingers inching closer to her backside.
Bell raised her eye brows in warning. “Don't you dare grab my butt!” Bella said, trying the best she could to keep a threatening look on her face, but her lips would twitch threatening to smile.”
“What are you going to do about it? You can't stop me.” Quil challenged, grinning mischievously.
“Jacob!” Bella screamed.

“Quil, get your paws off my girl.” I threatened, even though I felt pretty confident that he wasn't going to do anything to her. I guess you could say that an imprinted wolf would be the ultimate definition of harmless flirting.
“Awww, you guys are no fun.” Quil complained as he walked over, dropping Bella in my lap.
“Did impri . . .” Brady stopped when Embry elbowed him, darting his eyes at Jackie. “. . . make you loose your mind?” He asked Quil.
Jackie looked at Embry confused, shaking her head with a sigh.
“Nah, just messing with her. You alright, Bells?” Quil asked.

“Yeah, I'm fine. So did that or Jacob stop you from grabbing me?” Bella asked, referring to him being imprinted.
“Both. I hadn't thought of grabbing your ass until you told me not to. Then I almost did just because I could and you said not to.” Quil shrugged. “But it wasn't worth making Jake angry, another time it might be worth it.” He winked at Bella, grinning mischievously once again.
“You're insane.” Embry added, shaking his head.
Quil lunged, knocking Embry off the log he was sitting on which quickly turned into an extensive wrestling match in the sand.

Jackie smiled at them, but still looked hurt. She looked up, meeting my eyes and mouthed 'tell me'.
I gave Bella a squeeze in my lap and then set her down on the log next to me. “I'll be back,” I whispered to Bella, kissing the top of her head.
I looked at Jackie and nodded my head towards the water, she stood and we walked together. I wasn't sure at all what I would tell her, but I knew that this was part of my responsibility as alpha to handle the public view of us.
“It has been a busy summer. You doing alright?” I asked.
“Yeah, it is going fast. I wish that you and Bella had been able to work at the resort with Embry and I.”
“I agree that would have been great. Bella being in that car accident was certainly unexpected.”
There was a small chunk of drift wood that Jackie would kick as we walked along. The waves rocked back and forth next to us and I could see several fish jump out of the waves into the ocean far in the distance.

“So was loosing Sam. I know that you guys were all close to him.” Jackie added, softly.
“Yeah we were. He was a great friend and mentor to us all.”
“I get that, sort of. I have never quite understood how you all became such good friends.”
“Do you remember over a year ago when we all got pretty sick and missed school for several days?” I asked, silently trying to think of the best way to explain our connection to one another that would make sense.
“Yeah, it was pretty scary. It seemed that every few months one of you were getting really sick, some kind of super flu that we were all nervous about catching.”
“It was pretty scary for us too, and because Sam was the first to get sick he was a great help.” I took a deep breath to let myself think of what to say next. “It was almost like surviving a near death experience with someone, it was very bonding and neither of the people are ever the same afterwards.”
Jackie touched my arm to get us to stop walking. “Did you almost die?”
“No, not really, but it is the closest example that I have.”

Jackie took a deep breath, looking out over the water. I swallowed nervously, but tried really hard not to seem nervous. We stood there for a while, the waves came forwards and back, licking our toes.
“Jake, what am I missing? There is something big that I don't know.”
I shook my head slowly. “I don't know, Jackie.”
“Please, don't lie to me.”
“Ok, I won't, but it is not that simple.”
Neither of us were paying attention to the water and a wave came and splashed us, covering Jackie from the knee down and she shrieked.
I began to laugh. “This is so not funny, Jake, that was cold.” She said, brushing the water drops off her legs and shivered.

I took her hand and we walked away from the water and sat down on a piece of driftwood. Feeling her cold hand in mine gave me an idea. “Jackie, do you remember me explaining why I'm so warm?”
“Yeah, you said it was a family thing.”
“That also adds to the bond that we all have to each other. We aren't just 'brothers' because we had a similar experience, we are also family.”
“What about Embry? I thought he was Makah.”
“He is . . . um. . . so is Emily and her and Leah are family, so it still counts.” I didn't really think it was my place to say anything about Embry's father and who he might be. The conversation was complicated enough without adding that to it as well.

“What about Bella? Clearly she isn't related to you all.”
“Well that is a good thing for me.” I smiled. “Being related to Bella would be a problem.”
Jackie rolled her eyes and laughed. “Yeah, I guess that would be bad. The point is there seems to be a hesitation or something with me that is not there with Bella.”
“I'm sorry, Jackie.” I draped an arm around her, giving her a hug. “It's kind of a guy thing.”
“Bella is not a guy.”
“Once again, that is a good thing for me.” I grinned.
Jackie shook her head. “You are a dork, you know that right?”
“Yeah, I do know that, thanks for the reminder though.”
We sat their silently for a little while both of us lost in our own thoughts. I kept my arm across her shoulders to keep her warm, when I noticed her bring her legs up to her chest wrapping her arms around them.

“Are you sure it is not me?” Jackie asked softly. “That maybe I'm not the right person for Embry or something like that.”
“Not at all, I think that you are perfect for Embry. Are you unsure that you want to be with him?”
“No, I'm sure. I love him.” Jackie smiled and her eyes sparkled when she thought about Embry.
“Good, he loves you too. And everyone else likes you too. It is not you at all, I promise.”
“Alright, thanks Jacob.”
“Anytime, I mean that. However we should get back, I don't want Embry to think I'm going after his girl.” I grinned playfully.
Jackie laughed. “We can't have that.”

We walked back to the group and Embry and I looked at each other. I could tell that he wanted to know what that was about and I knew that I would tell him later. I sat down next to Bella, pulling her into my lap as I wrapped my arms around her waist, content to hold her while watching my friends relaxing. Emily announced that it was time to eat and a new fight almost broke out to who could get there first, until Emily reminded everyone that ladies needed to go first. Leah laughed as she jumped to the front followed by Kim, Jackie, Rachel, Emily and then Bella. There was so much food that for once I thought that there might be left overs, but that wasn't the case.

“How does that not make you sick?” Jackie asked, shaking her head at Embry and myself as she walked around with a trash sack for us to put our empty plates into. “It almost makes me sick just thinking about eating that much food.”
“What can I say, he is a beast?” Embry elbowed me.
I grinned. “No, not me,” I joked, clearly lying.
“Whatever, I didn't eat half as much as you did.” Embry replied.
“There is a reason that I'm top dog.” I couldn't help laughing at our puns.
“Oh, is that why. I thought it was something else.” Bella giggled, shyly.

I felt a slight blush creep across my cheeks, as I looked at her with surprised eyes. I expected her to look innocent, not meaning that the way it sounded. One look at her red face made my jaw drop in shock.
“Damn, Bella making Jacob blush.” Paul laughed, holding his hand out for a high five, which Bella leaned over to reciprocate despite her embarrassment.
“Gross, too much info.” Rachel shuddered.
“I am not blushing.” I insisted.
“Sure, sure,” Jared smirked.

I laughed as I scooped Bella into my lap and kissed her until we were both panting.
“Jeez, get a room.” Leah scoffed.
I flipped her off and continued to kiss Bella, hearing several laugh around us. Coming for air, I gave Bella another hug and cradled her into my chest.
“Can you believe that we have one more month until we head off to college.” Jackie said to Bella.
“Shhhh, we don't talk about that.” Embry said, kissing Jackie's lips.
“Uhmmm,” I murmured, as I watched Embry with Jackie. They really were fantastic together and it was so obvious that they both loved each other a lot. Embry took her hand and they began to walk along the beach.
“What?” Bella turned looking up in my face.
“I don't . . . I don't know if I should go.” I said, softly. “I didn't expect to be alpha when I made the plans to go away to college.”

“Should I stay?” Bella asked.
“No, I don't want to keep holding you back.” Bella opened her mouth to protest, and I placed my finger over her lips. “No, don't say it. You know it is true, you would have already gone to college if it weren't for me.”
“I'd also be a vampire.”
“Shhhh, we don't talk about that.” I kissed her lips, wrapping her closer to me. I could feel Bella's smile as she kissed me back, then snuggled in closer her head, resting against my shoulder.

“So was all that hard work this past year for nothing?” Bella whispered.
I shrugged. “Well it did get me out of high school, that is something.” I smiled weakly.
“Why do I feel like we get together, just to be separated again?” Bella gave my neck a small kiss and I took a deep breath.
“I don't know, but we will work something out for us to see each other often. Maybe I can still live with you there and come back and forth.” It wasn't a very good solution and I knew it, but it was all I could think of.

The moon was full and bright as it reflected across the rippling waves. It was a cool evening from the rain today and I threw a couple more logs on the fire before coming back to sit next to Bella.
“What will you do when you are here?” Bella asked.
“Maybe, I'll finally be able to work on your truck and the Rabbit, get them working again.”
“That would be nice, then we can give the Hummer back.”
“Awww, you don't think we can keep her.” I half-joked. I really did like the Hummer it was such a great ride, but it was weird coming from Edward.
Bella rolled her eyes and shook her head. “You and cars.”
“Cars are something I'm good at and there are always a bunch of broken cars on the res because people can't afford to take them to Dowlings. Things are so over priced there that I could probably work something out using most of my own tools and still make a profit.”

“What about being a wolf?” Bella asked.
“What about it?” I asked looking at her face confused.
“You said that you would quit after Victoria was destroyed.”
“Oh yeah.” I paused. “I kind of forgot about that. I don't know if I can. It was different when Sam was alpha instead of me.”
“I understand.”
“Do you really, Bells? Because I know that me not aging was a problem for you.”
“Yeah it is, but I can't take you away from your pack, especially with you being their leader. How selfish would that make me?”
“It doesn't make you selfish, it makes you normal.”
“Normal would be nice.”

“If I stopped, is there anything about me being a wolf that you think you would miss?” I asked.
“Do you think that you'll be this hot?”
“I don't know. My heat, that is what you will miss, not my strength or endurance?”
“I assume that you will always be strong. I wouldn't mind your heat coming down a few degrees, but if you were a normal temperature then I think I would miss how warm you are. Do you have any idea at all when you would be able to quit?”
“Not right now, but I do not want to be a wolf forever. I want to grow old with you and so I will stop when I can. I'm sorry, that is the best I can promise right now.”
“That is fine.”
Bella pulled me down for a kiss and we continued to kiss passionately until the fire went out.

Permalink Reply by Anita Newbill on September 13, 2011 at 2:42pm

Welcome back!!  This site is easier to use for me!!   Re-read all the chapters so I'll be up to speed with the nextI updates!!  I   wish Bella weren't  going to Alaska!!  Couldn't she transfer to U of WA after the first semester or something??   Absence doesn't allways make the heart grow stronger!!  Esp at the stage in their relationship!!  PLEASE??!!!    O K, I'll trust you with my heart, OK??!!??

Permalink Reply by JJ on September 13, 2011 at 3:09pm

Why do you think that Bella is going to Alaska??   She is going to Washington State, in Seattle  (so is Jackie and Leah, and Jacob was going to, but now thinks he should stay in La Push). 

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