The Twilight Saga

this is how i think the story should go please be nice this is my first time trying this. it all starts after bella and edward get back and there in  the woods with jake.






bella pov

when i saw jake with the bags under his eyes i felt terrible because i knew they were my fault.jake and edward talk about some thing i was listening until jake said  you breaking the treaty .a listen but not that much . i was thinking about leaving edward for jake . whenthey got done fussing i had made up my mind jake. he put the piece back together when edward rip them up.so i walk over to jake they both had a suprise look on there faces.i look jake in the eye and he look back the way he look at me made me hate myself for leaving him. jake i love you and you are a great guy who will always take care of  me and keep me safe and i know you will never leave me.edward caught on a little faster than jake because he whispered my name.



jake pov 

when bella stared say all this stuff t first i thought she was going to leave me. and run of with her blood sucker. i heard edward say ''bella''. then i knew she was choosing me over him . i try me hardest not to kiss bella in front of edward but it was so hard .

bella pov

when jake realize i choose him he look lighter happier than before . i did not want to kiss jake in front of edward but it was hard.i turn to edward and apologized   for hurting him so bad . its like him and jake switch face expression. but edward look that scary depress.i gave him a hug i knew he did not want to let go but he did.when i got back in jake arms it was soo  not on purpose  i kiss jake his wam soft lips caress. i heard a sigh that sounded like failure.then a rustle .when i turn around he was gone but the Volvo was still there that let me know how upset he was.

edward pov

my heart  had shattered when bella said she is choosing him over me it hurt so bad and then to prove she was not playing she kissed him in front of me .i thought bella was going to  mine for ever. so i just run i try to out run the pain it was just to fast for me 


bella pov 

me  jake stop kissing and he put me on his back and we run to his house .when we got to jake house he told me that when i choose him instead of edward, he had imprinted on me i was happy to know he loved me but i was confused on the imprinting thing he explain that to me. he also said it happens completely by surprise. i was quiet for a little to long thats when jake started kissing me. our tongues were moving fast and out of control. he move his hands  over my thigh and hips it felt so good.

jake pov
after i explained to bella about imprinting it was quiet i hated it so i started to kiss her it feel so good to rap my tongue around hers.as i held her i caressed her sides and her hips i never thought i would be doing this with my childhood crush.

bella pov

me and jake made out in his room until billy knock on the door'' jake who are you in there with you'billy ask that scared use both.he got off me and tried to answered billy'' uh uh uh then jake whispered to me that he did not know what to say so i said tell the truth.and look at me and said ok .billy said hello?  b-bella and then he open the door. billy mouth was drop. then he ask me if i was cheating i said no me and him broken up. i left him for jake. you need to tell charlie your home he had been worried sick ok .jake was still looking dumbfounded so your not mad.why would i be billy ask .jake just shrugged it off.

10 minutes later 

me ,jake and billy were at charile's. while jake helped billy out the truck charlie gave me a monster bear hug.''where were you ,you were gone for three days i thought something bad had happed to you 'charile said. sorry dad i really am .did you leave for that cullen guy. when charlie said that i hung my and he told me that he doesn't  love you.''if he loved you he wouldn't have left charlie went on bells you can just leave me like that you scared the living day lights out if me. i put my arms around charile and said sorry.did you get a ride from jake and billy. before i could answer billy said no they were making out in jake's room,thanks dad jake said and then  billy said your welcome . then charile asked me if i was still with edward and i said no me and jake go out? i said it in question form 'cause i was not sure. he said yes and i nodded my head at charile.

jake pov 

it feel right to have bella claim me as her boyfriend that means i have up graded for bestfriend to boy friend . billy stayed at charlie and watch games.me and bella sneaked off back to my house.we run into the woods and started to play then we end up on the grass make out.jake, bella ask can this be our meadow.i said but ask why she told  me if i ever leave this is were i can find you. when bella climbed on top of me my nose started to burn it stung so i told bella we should go in i didn't want to freak her out.but know bella she didn't instead she started asking questions and making it really hard to be serious.   then it go stronger and stronger then i pull bella of me and told her we have to leave now there is a vampire near.

bella pov

when i heard jake say that the first thing i did was start to walk closer to him.then i ask was it he said it was him and he was mad.then edward came out the trees with a scary look on his face and said of course i be mad you took something that was mine.then i said to edward but you left what was yours.you left me alone and my was shattered into a bunch of piece jake took his time and found every pie of my heart,as i said that i look at jake. then i went on you expect to come back and keep me, no jake has use his love to put me back together. then edward had his nerve to call jake a dog.

jake pov

when bella started to tell edward of i knew she really loved me. all i was thinking was get him bella ,bad bad bloodsucker and and bella show that leech who's boss and then i started laughing in my hind to annoy him. then yelled  SHUT UP YOU STUPID DOG!!!!!!!!!!!!

edward pov

that dog teasing and taunting was getting on nerve so i called him a stupid dog  and that got bella mad then she started telling me to leave and get out of her life. and when i said she was my life  she told me to get a knew on jake started laughing his head off .

bella pov

when i told edward to get a new life jake started to laugh i look at him and ask him if he had lost his mind. he said no and stop laugh slowly .when he finally stop laughing i guess it was what he thought because edward push me out the way all i screamed edwards name and thats when i blacked out.


jake pov
 when i saw edward  push bella in to the tree i use every inch of my power to not kill him . when i run over to see if bella was ok she was passed out ,her arm was bent funny and her head was bleeding. when edward ttied to come see how bella was i growled at him. he run some where but i did care all i wanted was for bella to be ok . i run her to the hospital .


2 hours later

i was in the wait room when Carlisle came out he said it was ok for me to see bella . before i went in to see bella Carlisle ask how she got hurt. i had to think about how to react with out shouting.he was mad at me for laughing at him and he pushed bella out the way to get to me .she fell in to a tree.i said it slowly so i would not freak out. Carlisle apologized for edward's action and then i walked in the room.

bella pov

when i woke up i saw jake starring at me i knew were i was because of all the white.the first thing jake said was he was sorry and this was all his fault.i wouldn't let him say that . it was all edwards fault .i brush jakes head and told him to kiss me. when his warm lips wrapped around mine it warm them so.i got so intense and hot . as he moved his tongue up and down my neck the heart monitor started beating faster then there was a knock at the door jacob opened it.IT WAS HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
he had his never to come here. i was jake face when edward pushed by his arms started to shake. the heart monitor started to beat  faster.then i said jake namme he gave this look like he was about to phase. 

1 month later

jake pov

today i could take bella out the hospital when i went there she was not there i ask the nurse and she told me that an edward cullen had checked her out while she was sleep. that when i lost it.when i was in the woods i phased i had had enough of him he was dead.

bella pov when i woke up i was in edwards room  . i saw alice in achair acroos the rom i asked her why was i here and where was edward she said he was down stairs i asked her to take me home as soon as she agreed edward was in the room thats when i started to yell.WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING YOUR NOT ALOUD TO SEES ME LET ALONE TAKE ME OUT THE HOSPITAL ALICE PLEASE TAKE ME HOME. she said ok edward tried to stop her but she said no.

jake pov 

i was walking out the door to go the cullens when i smelled a vampire i was hoping it was edward just hoping but it was alice .with bella on her back bella run to me and gave me a hug i thanked alice and she left. when me and bella stopped hug i told her we need to see charlie to let him know your okay and out the hospital .

2 hours later
after me and bella came back for charlies  i took her to the beach. i had a suprise for her and she would love it.so when we got to our  bench i got down on one knee and said to bella i will promise to love you every time your heart beat every step you take and every move you me isabella swan will you marry me? but right before she said something there he was.  

edward  pov

when i saw that dog on his knees i had to lie do something to make bella say no.bella don't say yes i said to her then she asked why and then i said he has been sneaking around with his werewolf  girl friend . when i said that bella look at him and said leah.he stund up quick and started to deny it. bella if you leave with me i won't cheat .

jake pov 

i can't believe je is ling like this i ask bella does she believe him she just stund there.

bella pov

i could not believe what i was hearing it hurt i didn't know how to believe .then they started to argue i screamed SHUT UP!!!!!!! and i run straight to Emily's place she run outside asking me wat was wrong.i told her the story and right before emily said any tthing there was leah pulling up on her black motorcycle i run and hugged her and told her wat was happening.she ask me why would she go out with her brother .she also asked me why would i believe edward and not jake? so then jake came running so i give him a hug and whispered in his ear. yes .he put the ring on my finger and emily and leah were so happy.

Tags: bella, edward, jacob

Views: 259

Replies to This Discussion

jake pov

when bella left i started to follow her until the bloodsucker said she is not going to have the twin.the i turned around and look at him.tthen i asked him if you love bella you much why would go and kill her .then edward said he was not going to kill me he said he was going to kill the twin i went to daddy mode fast i ripped in to a wolf . the i smelled Emmett he told me to calm down i was so heated. his hands shocked .then he told me bella wants you i run as fast as i could to her i was the in a minute.she was inside crying i went in to see what was wrong. she asked me if she could sty at the cullens til the twins were born i agreed i was for the babies and bella saftey.
hay i need some baby names a little help
Ok how about Auna Shea Black and Jorden Gage Black?
Auna Shea is the name Im going to give to my lil girl if I ever have one. Jorden is a very strong ame and my lil boys middle name is Gage lol just thought I would give you some names
bella pov

me and jake were talking about baby name and we both liked Jordan and Lea.
Jordan Danella Black and Lea Lorraine black.

2 weeks later

my belly is starting to hart. then i scream THE BABIES AR.E COMING.the next thing i new was i was in the car scream alice and carlisie were holding my hand and ithink alice was on the phone with jake . i could stop screaming it hurt so bad .the i screamed jake stay away for me.alice started cranking up when i said that.

1 day later
i final had the twin lea and jordan my life jake held lea first thenjordan he held his babies.

jake pov

it was 2 mnoths scence the twin were born they were so cute and really good me and bella haven't been happier. one day i had to go to the story for formula, milk diaper and headache medicine.when i came back bella was missing and the twins were inn the house knew some thing bad had happen because bella never laeft the house with out the twins. she felt bad when she when to the bathroom for 5 min. there was some thing really wrong. the i found a note that said ''i love you jake please takee care of the kids and a the both of the note was a little bit of her blood. then there was a knock at the door i was on the edge of crying then alice saidd that edward had kid napped bella.
bella pov

all i could think about was ''were the twins okay?'' where was jake ?'' werethey home alone?'' they knew how to get out of the cribs so then i thought what happens if the get into the bleach or some thing. i hated every little part of edward now for taking me for my babies lea and jordan are home alone.then i started to cry i cryed for about 5 min. then there was an ice cold hand whipping the tears for my face ''sorry my love'' edward said as he whipped the tears away. i pushed his had away and scream'' GET AWAY FOR ME I HATE YOU. then is whispered''lea joradn and started crying harder
Ok I cant reply to what you just wrote but I can reply to everything else lol thats funny. But I really like it its starting to get really good so please keep going. I cant wait to read what you have next up your sleeve.
bella pov


as i cried i heard jake howl an i knew he found me. i ran to the door but before i could open it edward was in front of me '' bella stay with me i need you more than he does. you are my whole world bella i need you.the i heard''bella ? bella were are you? and then jake BLOOD SUCKER I KNOW YOU ARE I THERE. when jake pushed down the down edward fell on me. when he fell on me it felt like an ice cold rock then it when black.
GOOD
I haven't read the whole thing yet but i promise I will. I think the one thing you are missing is the love between Edward and Bella is stonger than just the surface love that she has for Jake. Yes in time IF EDWARD WAS NOT IN THE PICTURE I believe Bella would be happy with Jake but only I Edward were never to come back in the first place. She holds out the hope for the true love that she has always wanted in her life.
Your writing is very much like a young girl who has a lot of life trials still ahead of you. Basic good start. English leasons are not my strong suit but let me try and give you a few pointers. First I feel that Edward can not come back to Fork's because that only give Bella hope that they can be together. Second according to Stephenie's discription of imprinting Jake could never Imprint with Bella (It would already have happened. He could not just will it to happen.) Take this as a rough draft and work on twicking it and move it to a spell Check/grammer check document. Be more discriptive and add more background information. You have a very nice start just keep working on it.
i thought it was good but i didnt like the part wen they we engaged

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