What if . Bella decided to reach over and kiss Jacob in her truck? Would that change how she feels about Jacob over all ? Knowing the feelings he has for her,knowing he could give her more. Knowing,she wouldn't have to change for him...
[Disclaimer]; not everybody posts the disclaimers in their fanfiction,but i'm going to. ;) Idon't own Twilight,or any of the characters in it. All belong to Stephenie Meyer- All though I wish I did.(;
A/N; I hope you enjoy ... :) & I'm starting at chapter 1 :)
Chapter 1; One Last Look.
My fingers were curled tightly around the steering wheel,as i stared out ahead of us. We were in front of Charlies-though his cruiser was missing. I bite the inside of my lip,my brows mashed together,listening to Jacob's breathing. He was staring out the window,as we sat in my old truck silently. Sometimes, I wish I knew what he was thinking,and then he let out a breath.
"What are you thinking,Bells?" he asks,breaking the awkward silence.
I loosen my grip on the steering wheel,and lean into the seat-sighing,"I,was ... Going to ask you the same thing." I tell him,glancing side-ways. He was still looking out the fogged window.
" You really want to know what i'm thinking about?" he questions,now turning to look at me.
His stare sent shivers through-out my body,and his question made me think about how to answer. Do I want to know what he's thinking about? The way he said it,makes me wonder if it's a bad thing- something I actually don't want to know. But,maybe I'm just over-thinking. I do want to know what he's thinking about,but,maybe when I do know-I'll regret asking what he was thinking about.
I'm over-thinking... I think.
I nod,"Tell me what you're thinking about Jake."
He smirks,his eyes slightly lidded."You." he whispers."Always..."
I sigh,and smile weakly."Jacob..."
He shakes his head,and takes my hands off the wheel-and into his hands,mine so small compared to his. I look down,not wanting to stare into his eyes-knowing it would be for the best. I think. Because,if I fall in love with Jake ... I'm just going to end up hurting him,when Edward comes back. Eward will come back,I know it... Jacob is my best friend,and i can't stand,loosing him.
"Bella,I love you. I've always loved you. And you know that,I know you know that." He sighs,"Bells,look at me. Please." I bit my lip,and shook my head.
"I can't." I whisper.
One hand disapeared from mine,and moved swiftly under my chin. Forcing me to look up at him,I tried to look away from his face,but mine landed on his. His gaze so intense,I couldn't look away. His hot breath was circulating around my face,the woodsy scent i always loved-intoxicating me. Wanting me to move closer to it. But I stayed where I was,our gazes interlocked.
I was waiting for him to say something,but he just remained speechless;his lips parted-as in lost in thought. I bit down on my lip hard,as the silence intensified. Just when realization hit me. My fingers slowly,crawling up his arms-as his hands hooked onto my waist-pulling me into his lap.
Jacob can never be just a friend to me. I've always seen noticed him,always known he was attractive to me in some way.But,Edward...
"I can't hurt you." I mumble,my lips brushing across his in the process. I never noticed how close we were until now.
"Do you love me?" he asks,his eyes closed-waiting for my answer.
I press my lips tightly together,curling my hands into fists-agaist his covered chest. "I..." i press my lips back together,taking a stead breath.
[for now... watching Salt :3]
ahah, i usually never do !
i'm too lazy too,most of the time.
hahah,that'd suck :$
& thanks Rocelia ! <3
Wright more I love it
Chapter 3 ; Italia
We were bording the plane to Italy,to Volterra,to him. The guilt had spread all thourough-out my whole body,from leaving Jake for Edward. I don't love Edward the same way I used to,but I can't say Jake has replaced him. Jake had stitched back the holes in my heart,and they were only torn back apart seeing that I've hurt him. That's how I know I love him. I love him so much,that it hurts. Physically,and emotionally. Being away from him- knowing i've hurt him,I can't even explain.
Alice glanced over at me every now and then,checking on me. At some points tears would just randomly fall down my cheeks,and she'd pull me close and whisper that it'll all be okay,and that Jacob will forgive me,if he loves me that much. I look over at her,and she's leaning back against the seat-her eyes half lidded,frozen. Her brows pull together in furstration? What's she seeing? She grips the arm rests,her nails ripping the material.
"Alice?" I whisper harshly,"Alice!"
Her jaw clenches and she lets out a hiss. I look around us,seeing if anyone has noticed that,or is noticing her actions.
I touch her arm,"Alice..." i growel,and she suddenly snaps out-looking at me confused.
"Yes Bella?" she asks.
"What did you see?"
She takes in a deep breath,"I saw it. Them , Jane ... Alec, Aro ... The decision. They're deciding. Bella,we're running out of time." she whispers frantically.
I start hyperventalating,"What do you mean we're running out of time?!"
"Correction; you're running out of time. He'll only believe you. When we get there,you're going to have to go by yourself,or he'll think i'm just tricking him into coming back. He won't believe me,because he knows I'd lie for him to live. He-" she stops suddenly,going back into a trance. Another vision.
I don't bother her this time,although it seemed to drag on longer than the last one. I could've thought she'd be sleeping,but vampires don't sleep. Unless she was just pulling a facade,which I highly doubt from the way she just stopped talking mid sentence. My eyes suddenly felt really heavy,and i couldn't think about the trouble we were in anymore. What ... We're ... Supposed ...
"Don't be scared." he mutters, taking my hand-the second time jumping. Jacob was really pissed off that I jumped earlier without him,especially since Victoria was out there. He promised we'd do it another time,together. Just in case she decided to pay another visit.
"I'm not scared." I tell him,clutching his hand tighter. It took a lot of convincing for Jake to come and jump with me after the stunut I pulled earlier. But he could never say no to me.
"Alright-you ready?" he asks,looking at me in the eyes,knowing the truth is all there.
I nod,"Let's do this."
Jumping with Jacob was nothing compared jumping alone. Especially when the waves aren't as violent,and deathening. But that jump had brought a lot of mayhem. The problem I am in now. The decision I had made,that only hurt the one I love,for someone who broke my heart. It really doesn't make sense when I put it that way.
"No one will ever love you as I much as I do." his fingers brush away the damp hair out of my face,his warm lips pressing to my forehead. "I only love you. I've never felt this way about anyone, ever." he mumbles against my skin. "I'm into you,like you never knew." he chuckles.
I smile slightly,"I know,But-"
"But what?" he cuts me off.
"If you let me finished,you'd know." I say,raising my eye brows. He rolls his eyes,and gestures for me to go on."Well, as I was going to say-before I was rudely interupted." I wink,"I like you too,but ... Not in the same way."
He scoffs,"Okay,whatever you say!" He rolls his eyes,"But remember; I don't believe you." He shrugs,with a smug smile on his face.
"Fine,be that way." I say crossing my arms,and start walking away from him-the waves hitting my feet.
He catches up to me in seconds,"I will be that way. Until you admitt how you feel about me."
I stop,and look up at him."You'd think I would've admitted it by now,if it were true."
He can't help himself cringe,I'd hurt him."No-I don't think that's it. You know you do,you're just scared to admitt it. Scared that you're going to move on and forget about him. Scared that when he does come back-and you've moved on,that you'll fall for him all over again-and leave me. Hurt me. But,Bella...Nothing you could do would ever hurt me. And I know you love me,I know you want me." he steps closer to me,pressing his hand to my chest-causing my heart to skip a beat."I can feel it. Everytime I'm near you. And you know it."
I didn't know what to say. I seem to always find myself speechless with him,because he always seems to surprise me. Or read my mind.
My eyes flew open to the sound of wheels squealing against cement. Alice looks over at me,with a soft smile."We're here." she says,while getting up after the person on the speaker said it was safe to take off our seat belts. Mine was off too,and Alice had all of our bags in her hands. Which was only two,just in case.
I get up,and follow Alice outside,she was wearing a very evil looking grin on her face. I didn't bother asking,until she walked over to a bright yellow porche. Oh,tell me no. This is NOT her car.
"I saw her in my vision... And I just had to have her!" Alice runs her fingers along the sides of the polished car,until she get's to the drivers' side,opening the door-and sliding in. "C'mon Bella! We don't have all day!" she yells at me urgently.
I run over to the passenger's side,and jump in-closing the door while she drove away. Fast.
"What did you see in your vision earlier?" I ask her,remembering.
"They haven't made the decision yet. But Edward has decided to make it for them..."
"What do you mean by that,exactly?" I ask her,my eyes squinting.
"He's going to show himself. At noon,to everyone. The Volturi will have no choice but to kill him then,dispose of him. Remeber; that's the number one law. We need to stay hidden,and if anyone sees him- well,it's bad luck for pretty much all of us." she says,and then squeezes the bridge of her nose as if thinking of something."Oh no. Oh no,oh no,oh no."
"WHAT?!" I scream,mirroring her own terrified expression. I feel like this is moving all too quick.
"The decision is made." she looks at me,"Bella! We need to move quick,and when we get there-you need to run!"
I look at her terrified,"Are you kidding me?! Me .run ? By myself?! Are you serious!" I scream at her.
"Bella,you can't waste time. You need run straight-and don't look back! I'll stay with you as long as I can,but then you're on your own." she screams back at me.
"Don't scream at me!" I scream at her,ready to pull my hair out with frustration.
"Then stop screaming!" she snaps,gripping the steering with an intensity,that she'd most likely leave marks in. Then she stomps her foot on the gas pedal-making us fly forward at such an unknown speed.
I look forward,spotting a large castle? Cars parked alon the side of the hill,Alice speeding around them-pushing some aside in the process. My hands slapped to the side of my face,and I started screaming. No one in my life has driven this fast,especially with me in it. I feel like I'm about to hurl. I feel ... Woozy. Alice puts her hand to my forehead,trying to calm me down,as if she could read my mind. Or maybe she saw me pushing the door open and getting sick.
"Bella,we're almost there." she reaches behind me,causing the car to swurve-but I caught it in time,to put it back on track as she put on gloves,a pair of dark sun-glasses a sun hat,and a scarf. To hide her sparkling skin.
She takes back the wheel,and rolls up to the gates of the Volterra. The name sent shivers down my spin,and everywhere else in my body as much as the Volutri. I can do this,I can do this,I can do this. I chant in my head.
An officer held his hand up to stop us,yelling at us in a foregin language. Alice rolls down the window,and starts to speak with him in the same tonuge. She pulled something our of her purse,slipping it into his hand,flashing him one of her breath taking smiles-that reminded me of Edward. Sometimes I think they could really be related, they had the same eyes-smile,nose...
Alice rolls back up the window,and the officer starts to have an arguement with another officer,before the gate was opened-and we were aloowed to pass. "Okay,"she says looking at me,"I'll take you as far as I can go. But then,you need run for your life-Edward's life." she says,taking the glasses off to reveal the intensity in her eyes.
"I will Alice." I promise her,"I'll try."
"You can't just try Bella. You have to do it. Your ultimate best." she says,speeding through the long narrow drive,and honking at people to warn of her coming.
A few people threw there fists at us,but Alice ignored easily,and then came to a sudden hault. I'm guessing this is where it ends.
She unlocks the door,and pushes it open. She takes my hand-looking me dead in the eyes,"Run." is all she whispers.
I nod-and turn my back on her jumping out the door,and nearly tripping on my way. I thought I heard Alice says something like ; try not to fall too much. I can't make any promises to that,but yes I'll try. I ran my fastest,pushing a shoving people out my way. The adreniline pulsing through my veins like never before.
Alice had stuck a piece of paper in my hand,the words written; Clock Tower. Where is that? I shove a person out of my way recieving a few curses,and possibly almost a black-eye. I tripped over someone's foot,and they gripped my arm pulling me up. The person started talking to me,but I couldn't understand. He didn't look mad though, I took out the paper from my pocket,and showed it to them. He nodded with a sympathetic smile/
"Dritto." he says,and I knew that very much. I nod thankfully,not knowing what to say,
"Thank you!" I gasp,hoping he'd understand,and dash straight.
I've never even pushed myself this hard in gym class. But I wasn't racing to save anyones' life in class. But right now,running through the streets of Volterra-coming all the way from Forks,Washington, about to save my ex-boyfriend from evil vampires,and saving his life- damn,who would've thought my life would turn out this way?
I pull my head up-to look upwards with all my strength,and see the tall building; the Clock Tower. It's not hard to miss,one minute to noon. One minute to save his life. But possibly loosing mine in the process. Bella,you can do this-just don't stop. Keep moving your feet!
Everyone was wearing red,red shirts - red cloaks,red ahts,red face painting. Red banners,red flags. St.Marcus' Day. Funny,I remember Edward saying something about that on my birthday,Marcus- one of the Volturri members. I laugh in my head but then snap out of it. No time for jokes,Bella. I continue shoving people out of my way,and ducking between and under peoples arms,legs... I look up at the Clock as it dung .
Thirty seconds. I screamed,"EDWARD! STOP! EDDWARD!" If only he could read my mind! I scream louder and louder,chanting his name-hoping he'd hear me."I'm here Edward! Don't do it!" I yelled as I ran,and I slipped into a fountain,getting completely drenched-but I keep on going. Never stopping,never looking back-as Alice told me not to.
I don't know if they were tears or just water,but i spotted a pair of doors opening-and there he was. I stop for a fraction of a second to smile,but when i saw that he was bare-chested,ready to step out into the light-I start running. Another ding. Ten seconds.
'EDWARD!" I scream from the top of my lungs,lunging forward into a full-out sprint,"EDWARD!EDWARD!EDWARD! DON'T DO IT!" I scream again, running out of breath-almost there. Another ding, five seconds. My legs were starrting to give out on me,but I can't stop now. I scream his name again,closer now- and I swear I saw him look up. He can hear me.
I pounce forward,smacking into him,"Edward!" I sigh,trying to push him back. But he wasn't moving. His arms wrapped around my waist,but he kept moving.
"Maybe Carlisle was right..." I heard him mumble.
"Edward,stop! What are you talking aobut!?" I scream at him histerically,"I'm not dead you stupid boy!" I yell,pushing on his chest. He took in a deep breath,and backed into the Tower,the door closing behind us. I sigh in relief,"Edward... I'm,so,sorry..."
He held me close to him,"Bella? What-what are you doing here? You shouldn't ... Bella,no." he pushed me up against a wall,his back suddenly in my face.
after the last flash back,it wouldn't let me go back to the original text formatt stuff.
so the rest is in italics so i put in a '~' to notify you that it's the end of that flashback,and that's 'reality' now.
Yeah, I was trying to stay on the same lines of the story,but also making it a little more different,which is why I'm adding so many flash backs when she's sleeping .
but thanks ;)