Chp 1 The Complicities of New life
The months seemed like days as I watch “Nessie” (even I have difficulty using the nickname of a monster for that of my daughter but she loves it) growing at an alarming rate. I have been reassured over and over that her rapid evolvement will stop once she hits the age of 21 as seen and lived by Hulien and Nahuel or 150 years now. It still is unnerving to remember my years growing up and know that there are so many things that she will be missing. The early years of school, making and bonding with friends, the fun and exciting vacations and being able to travel anywhere that they wanted too. We are restricted because of our body’s reaction to sunlight to being able to take Nessie anywhere that I remember going as a child. There would be no trip to Disneyworld, no playing at the park with friends and family, no sunny days out at the beach, only being able to go out when the sun is hidden or going to town at night after the sun sets. It makes me feel like the monster when I have to tell Jacob no about taking her out in public, with my eyes and features and Jacobs closeness to me everyone that knows us would see me in her and would start asking questions. The most dangerous thing of all, questions. The only thing that is forbidden by the Volturi as far as vampires are concerned, are the humans finding out about us. The one thing that keeps them out of our lives at the moment is the fact that we keep our lifestyle a secret. I hope and pray that the day never comes that they would come back on the hunt for us again (a cold shiver runs down my spine as I think of Aro’s hands as he grabs Nessie). Edward walks up behind me putting his arms around me and gently whispers in my ear, “What’s wrong Bella?” I just shrug him off as I turn to look at him once again being dazzled by his face, the way his eyes look at me so longingly, the soft curl of his lips, and suddenly I forget all about Aro and the conflicts that might be as I melt into his embrace and reach up to kiss him. We begin kissing softly, tenderly, as we don’t want this moment to stop and we are interrupted by the sound of gagging and giggles, hearing Emmet grumble “Come on get a room” and we see the disgusted look on Rose’s face. We both start laughing as I throw a pillow off the couch at him so fast that it knocks him backwards out of his chair before he can react. “Oops”, I say laughing as I remember that I am still the fastest and strongest vampire in the house.
I rush to the door as I hear Renesmee and Jacob returning from hunting. “How was dinner?” I asked as they approached the front porch. I see the look in Jacob’s eyes as she reaches up her hand to show me the full grown bear they encountered. I snarl at Jacob and he immediately yelled, “Hey I don’t like it, just as much as you do, but she wouldn’t accept anything else once she got his scent.” I relax as I sigh out loud knowing that what he said was true. I could taste the scent of the bear thru her vision and it did make my mouth water a little. “Fine but next time, take her somewhere a little safer please” I said to him glaring. “Jeez you act like I would let anything happen to her”, he said smiling “I would shred anything that even came close to endangering her, you should know that by now”. I sigh again knowing what he meant about him being protective over her. Damn imprinting, why, why, why did he have to imprint on her, but then I remember Sam and Paul’s conversation about imprinting. “There is nothing that can be done about it, its automatic” Sam said. “Come on Sam, a Vampire, even if she is half human, that’s just not even natural” Paul said as Sam growled and cut him off. “It is done and that is it, nature has its own reasons for doing it, THE END”. No one could say anything else, Sam was the Alpha, what he said was final.
“Come on Honey” I say to Renesmee, “Study time.” She immediately jumped on Jacob’s back and shrieked, “No, save me Jacob, don’t let her torture me pleeeeese!” She begged. Jacob laughed and pulled her off his back and placed her gently on the porch. “You know you have to or your MOM won’t let you play with me,” he jokingly said. “And besides, you have to learn and get accustomed to human life so that you will be able to blend in with the rest of he humans.” Renesmee begged with the puppy dog look in her eyes, “but I already know more than you, I can speak 3 languages and could get into almost any college.” Then she stuck out her bottom lip, pouting, really laying it on Jacob. “Don’t do that to me your breaking my heart,” Jacob said smirking. “I don’t think your mother would let me live if I ran off with you right now in my arms.” “Yea, you’d be dead in less than 10 feet,” I said laughing. Renesmee took off stomping in to the house, slamming the door behind her. “Yep, just like her mother” Jacob said rolling his eyes. “Hey Bells, I was thinkin, there is a new movie out and I’d like to take Nessie to go see it if you don’t mind.” “Jacob no, I’ve already explained this to you, she cannot go out into public until she is full grown” I say with a sigh. “I wish I could but we can’t afford to take any chances right now.” “The Volturi are looking for any reason right now to come back for us, the last thing we need to do is start rumors.” “I know” Jacob said, I could see the disappointment in his eyes, “well, had to try at least,” he said as he turned shimmered into his wolf form and took off. “You coming back tonight?” I holler at him as he was taking off. He turned around, giving me that ‘are you retarded’ look, then darted into the woods. I laughed as I walked into the house. Was I being too protective of my daughter? Would it hurt to let her get out with Jacob? Then the cold chill went down my spine as the picture of Aro grabbing Renesmee came back into my mind. Never could I be too protective.
I lightly skipped into the kitchen where Alice and Renesmee were leaning over the counter looking through books. I walked in further to see that Alice was already getting Nessie into designing. I laughed and shut the book in their faces and teasingly told Alice, “You are not going to corrupt my daughter to your ways.” “Aww, come on mom” Nessie said, “I am studying, and this will help me blend in with the humans”. “Fine, but tomorrow you have to start on your Calculus.” She rolled her eyes again then immediately started looking the books again at all the different color schemes and designs. I walk off knowing that any more interruption would hurt Alice’s feelings so I walked out onto the back porch and wonder what was life gong to be like for my half-human half-vampire daughter. My mind was going thru the different realities of what life might bring her but I couldn’t help but returning to the thought of that monster Aro getting his hands on my daughter. I heard the door open behind me, expecting Edward to come out but was suddenly blasted off the porch with a couch cushion. I twisted and flipped back onto my feet seeing Emmet there laughing saying, “Paybacks are hell”. That all he had a chance to say as I flew to him and threw him off the porch. He bounced once in the yard and landed in the river 50 yards away. At once everyone in the house came bouncing out the door laughing at the sight of Emmet half covered with mud and soaking wet. “That’s was my favorite shirt!” Rose complained. “He asked for it” I replied, laughing. 4 years as a vampire and he still hadn’t been able to get the best of me. I turned to walk into the house expecting him to give up out of pride, but before I could, SMACK, I was hit with an enormous mud ball. “You are going down now Emm,” I snarled, leaping off the porch and tackling him into the mud again, face first this time. I had him pinned down in the mud smacking his face into it. “You give up yet,” I asked in between his submersion in the mud, “Never!” He replied as I continued to hold his face in to the mud. I finally got bored and let him up. I quickly dove into the river to get the mud off my dress and out of my hair. In a flash I leapt out of the river and up onto the porch soaking wet shaking my hair out. “You’ve been hanging out with the dogs too much” Rosalie sneered as she wiped the water off her face and clothes. Nessie looked around the corner and stuck her tongue out at Rose, making everyone laugh. She blushed and ran back inside and hid behind Alice’s leg embarrassed.
Wow Alpha you're really good...even though I've tried I have never been able to get into Bella's head the way you did!
Excelant Chapter soo much emotion and of course humor!! Absolutely love the "You've been hanging out with the dogs too much" part!!
Please send me mail whenever you update this is definately one of the stories I want to continue following!!
Thanks you so much. Thats one of my favorite parts too. I really never thought about writing until after I had finished reading all of the books including the stolen midnight sun, sorry steph I couldn't help myself, the books left me wondering and thats where my imagination kicked in and I started writing my thoughts out and thats how it started. I have a very active imagination and it helps me to 'feel' what im writing. Thank you again for the input.
This is chapter 2
Chp 2 Questions
“He wants to know what?” Edward yelled. I noticed that Alice had gone into one of her trances seeing a glimpse of the future. “We knew this day was coming Edward” Alice said. “What, Who, don’t do this too me, TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON!” I yelled. “Its Charlie, Bella, he’s on his way and wants to know the truth.” Edward said. I mentally sighed knowing in the back of my mind this day was going to come when my dad would want the truth. He’s seen how fast Renesmee has grown and has felt my physical coldness, the way my eyes change color, never seeing me eat, I could only imagine what his reaction was going to be. “He loves you Bella” Alice said, “Nothing is going to change that.” “It’s not him that I’m worried about,” I said “I’m worried about the Volturi finding out that another human knows about us.” All of the sudden once again the vision of Aro grabbing Renesmee came flooding back into my mind. “Grandpa would never say anything to anyone, he loves us” Renesmee said. Then she looked up into my eyes and asked, “Mommy can I be the one to explain everything to him, I think that I can make him understand more with my sight than with your words.” “Renesmee is right Bella,” Carlisle said “it will be easier for his mind to comprehend being shown rather than being told.” I nodded as a million things came flooding into my mind as I thought about how my dad, Charlie, the chief of police, would take what he was shown. Would he run away freaked out of his mind? Would he never want to see his daughter and granddaughter the monsters again? Would he be able to accept it and keep on going the way he has always been? Edward walked over to me pulling me against his chest comforting me saying, “Don’t worry Bella, He loves you, he always has and nothing is ever going to change that.” I knew in my mind that what he was saying was true but there was always that wonder in the back of my mind.
We all sat there in expectation as we heard Charlie’s car turn onto the gravel driveway. It was me, Renesmee, Edward, Esmee and Carlisle. Everyone else went out to hunt so that the atmosphere would be a little less tense knowing that this could be the beginning of a disaster, depending on the outcome of our conversation. Carlisle opened the door when my dad got there and politely said, “Please come in Charlie.” He seemed very hesitant and nervous considering what all was going thru his mind. Edward laughed as he read some of the thoughts that were going through his head. “It’s nothing like that Charlie,” Edward said as I elbowed him glaring. “Grandpa, come sit next to me please,” Renesmee said, “We know why you came today and we think that it will be easier for you if I explained things to you the way I know how to.” “Ok,” he said hesitantly as he sat next to Nessie, still having a very worried look on his face. “Don’t be scared Grandpa, just relax, this is another way of me communicating with you,” Nessie said a she took his face in her hands. He shuddered at first and then closed his eyes as Ness showed him all of the events that took place. He jumped when she showed him the scene of what happened at her birth. He looked white as he looked at me, “Just wait for the questions until she has showed you everything please dad,” I said. He sat back and then Nessie put her hands back to his face to show him everything else that had happened with the Volturi. “That was why it was necessary not to tell you everything about what was going on before Grandpa,” Nessie said as she took her hands of his face. “Are you ok dad?” I asked. He just sat there mesmerized as it took a moment for everything to settle in. He turned to me and said, “I love you Bells no matter what you have become, this just is a lot to take in right now.” He turned to Carlisle and started with the questions. “So if blood is what ya’ll crave why did you decide to be a doctor?” “I enjoy helping people Charlie, I have become accustomed to the blood with centuries of practice,” Carlisle said. “So you turned your family into vampires?” he asked. “Only because there was no other way, I assure you that if there had been anyway to save them I would have. I would not want to curse someone else with this type of life if there was another way,” Carlisle said calmly. “It’s a lot more complicated than that Charlie,” Edward said, “She knew and wanted to make the change, I was against it as anyone in my family will tell you, she would have it no other way.” I knew that Edward had read my dad’s thoughts, “He’s right dad I wanted this, I fell in love with Edward and wanted to be able to spent an eternity with him, now I can.” “We just had no idea that Renesmee would be able to be conceived or it might not have happened so soon but because of what happened it was the only way to save me so to speak.” He laughed shaking his head, “Well all that matters is that you are here and I love you still just the same.” “And my first granddaughter too,” he said as he picked Renesmee and put her in his lap. “You know that you can never tell your mom about this right,” he said. “I know dad,” I said knowing good and well what would happen to mom if I told her any of this. “SO what do we do know?” he asked.
It was so much of a relief, I thought to myself, as I stood on the porch watching my dad drive home that night. Finally, no more worrying about what he might think, or how he might find out about how our family truly was. It was good to see him happy again. These last 2 years of him and Sue living together has done him some good. He looks healthier and happier now that he is not alone like he was after I first left. Sue keeps him in a pretty straight line. Although she will never break him of going to the diner on Thursday night for steak and cobbler, she at least has him working regular shifts and not taking all of the responsibilities on himself. He is finding more time for the important things in life. His face lights up so much when Renesmee runs up to him grabbing him in a bear hug. I’m glad that he is truly happy I think for once in his life. I know its’ hard on Seth and Leah to see their mother with another man but they know that he makes her happy and that’s what matters to them. Seth is almost done with college and has already gotten a job offer from an electrical company up north. They are going to pay his moving costs and are going to help him relocate. Leah is being Leah, working in Port Angeles and keeping an eye on Jacob. She refuses to go back to Sam’s pack and to tell the truth I don’t blame her. I wouldn’t want to be around the one that rejected me for someone else either. Jacob will never change. He will always be the reckless, fun loving, easy going goofball that I have always known. It just seems strange now that his focus is on Renesmee and not on me. Edward has finally warmed up to him and they go out hunting from time to time. I still wonder sometimes if Edward will come home and Jacob will never be found but I know that will never happen because of how much Ness loves him. Ness the mess, I am coming to call her now. The way Carlisle figured is that she ages 3 yrs to 1 so I am assuming that she is around 12 now. 12 going on 200 the way she acts. So focused on what she wants in some ways and in others just as carefree as any other human would be. Herein is my problem. She takes too many chances. Last week she decided she wanted to go see grandpa and took off running in broad daylight before Alice could let us know what she was doing. I felt so bad for yelling at her when Edward got her home but it just scared me so much to think of what might have happened. She felt so bad when she saw how upset I was and immediately I felt awful but I don’t know what I would do if something ever happened to her. She promised and swore that she would never do anything like that again. The next year flew by and that’s when I started noticing the changes in Renesmee that would come to haunt me for the rest of my days. Her feelings started changing with Jacob. It started small first with wanting to fix her hair and get dressed up anytime that Jacob would come over. Then came makeup that her aunt ‘Rosie’ was so happy to help with (I would still like to rip her head off for her help in that matter). Then the unthinkable day that we were not sure would come she started her period. It scared her to death, she had been out with Jacob hunting (which I was no longer allowed to go do with her now by her choice) when it started. She out ran Jacob coming home and when she got to the door with blood on her hands I immediately freaked out. Then I saw Jacob running up to the house as fast as he could. I called Carlisle to come home and let him deal with it. I didn’t know what to say or do I was stunned. Would she be able to get pregnant? What would happen? What would the baby turn out to be? Would the birth be the same as mine? Would it almost kill her like it killed me? So many questions my head felt like it would explode. Carlisle explained to me that the human part of her body was evolving and that was a part of the natural process. Then her moods really started changing. She couldn’t stand Leah being around Jacob. Everything that she talked about was about Jacob. Then she started asking to be able to spend more and more time with Jacob. I knew that Jacob would be happy with this because in his mind frame he was still her protector and for the time being I allowed it because Edward could keep a tap on Jacobs mind to see where it was at. That was just the beginning. Now that she could pass for 18 I allowed her to go out with Jacob for a movie. Edward told me that Jake was looking forward to the movie and was glad that Nessie was going with him. Some car movie he wanted to see. I thought everything was going to be fine. Boy was I wrong.
WOW!! That was awsome!!
Love the fact that you have a piece about Charlie in here, everyone seems to forget about him!
Again I can't believe how well you see things from Bella's POV....I mean the part about Nessie's change from toddler to teenager was really GREAT!!
Thank you again, I prefer to get into the characters head and put things from their point of view as if it were me there. It helps me feel more of the emotion involved with everything and helps me fell whats coming next.
Chapter 3 The Accident
“BELLA!” Alice screamed as she flew down the stairs. “What Alice, what’s wrong?” I asked her. Oh my god, what happened, what’s going on, did she see something, was someone coming for us again? A million questions ran thru my mind before Alice could answer me. “It’s Charlie, he’s going to the hospital to get Jacob and Renesmee, and he’s not sure what happened just that the police are asking for him.” I froze, the police? They are at the hospital? What happened? Edward flew into the garage as I heard one of the cars scream to life and fly out of the garage. He screeched to a stop in front of the door where I stood frozen. “Bella,” he yelled, “GET IN!” I stumbled down the stairs in a stupor and climbed into the car as Edward flew down the driveway throwing gravel everywhere. “Not my baby,” I choked out finally as I couldn’t force any other words to come out of my throat. “Hang on Bella, she’s going to be fine, we just have to see what happened.” That’s all that was said as we flew down the highway at speeds no human would dare. I couldn’t think of what I would do if something happened to Ness, it was too much for me to bear. I would never be able to have another child again as my being turned to a vampire would prevent that. She was everything to me. I love Edward so much but she came from me, my little piece of Edward that made my world whole. I wasn’t sure if I would ever be the same without her. I saw her life passing in front of me as we drove to the hospital, her cute little smile, the peacefulness I felt as she slept in my arms. Tears were running down my cheeks as I imagined what could possibly put her at the hospital and need Charlie to come.
“Mommy,” Nessie cried as she ran to me at the door of the hospital. Relief washed over me as I saw that nothing had happened to her. I saw my dad and Jacob talking in the hall. I walked to them, as my relief turned to anger as I grabbed Jacob by the throat and put him up against the wall. “What did you do to put my daughter in danger?” I snarled. “Mommy no, it was my fault not his” Nessie cried to me as she grabbed my arm. I relaxed my hold on Jacob as Ness reached out her hand to my face. I saw it all, Jacob coming out of the bathroom and bumping into the girl. I felt her anger build as she saw Jacob talking to the girl, and then I saw her walk up and push the girl through the door violently. I felt her remorse as soon as she did it, felt how scared she was that she had lost control of her temper. I looked at Jacob and saw the concern in his eyes. “What’s going to happen now?” I asked. “I have already talked to her parents,” Jacob said, “they understand how fast things can escalate with all things in consideration.” “What did you tell them?” I asked as my anger flared back up again. “Chill, Bella, they are from the reservation and know already what was going on, they have agreed to not file charges.” “Becky is going to be fine, just a concussion and 4 broken ribs, she is resting now.” Jacob explained as I heard Edward telling the nurses to send the bill to the Cullen’s house and that they would take care of all expenses. “I’m so sorry Bella, I never in a million years thought that this would happen.” “Now you understand why I have been so against you going anywhere with Renesmee,” I said. “It is just so dangerous with her having human emotions that can have vampire reactions.” “I see that now, I never would intentionally put her in danger.” He said with tears welling up in his eyes. I reached out and hugged him whispering in his ear, “I know you wouldn’t, don’t tear yourself up for this, none of us could foresee this happening” I assured him. “Thank you so much for coming,” I told my dad. “Anytime anywhere for any of ya’ll,” he told me. “Just be careful, I couldn’t imagine anything happening to Nessie.” He said as I saw the tears welling up in his eyes. “Don’t you ever do anything like that again,” my dad scoldingly told Renesmee as he hugged her. I think the hurt look on his face hurt her more than his words. “I’m sorry grandpa, it won’t ever happen again,” she said as she started crying again. “It’s ok, its ok just be careful,” he said comforting her. “I think there has been enough excitement for one night,” my dad said, “ya’ll get her home and I’ll finish up things here.” “Thank you dad,” I told him. “Thank you for coming to help with this Charlie,” Jacob said. My dad just gave him a nod and a look, pretty much the same ‘what were you thinking’ look I had given him for putting Renesmee in this situation.
I sat in the back and held Nessie’s head in my lap on the way home. Everyone was sitting at the table when we got home. Carlisle motioned for Nessie to come with him for a walk so I kissed her on the head and let her go. I watched my precious daughter walk out the back door with Carlisle and then sat down silent as Edward explained everything to Alice and the others. “I had a feeling there was an animal inside of her”, Rose said. “That girls is lucky, had I been in that situation I’m not sure I would have stopped.” “Yes we know how your temper goes,” Edward said rolling his eyes at her. She just hissed at him and then grabbed Emmet and headed for the garage. “I’m so sorry Bella,” Alice said as she hugged me, “I can’t see anything in her future much less Jacob’s.” I could see the frustration in her eyes. “It’s nothing that you can control,” I told her, “We know you would never let her out of your sight if there was another way.” “We were lucky that it was someone from the reservation that was already familiar with some of the situation.” Edward said calmly, “It could be a lot worse if it had been someone else who would be asking questions.” “I know and luckily my dad is friends with the police chief in Port Angeles and has agreed to forget that this ever happened,” I said reluctantly, “I can only imagine what would happen when the questions started and then the newspapers got a hold of it.” I shuddered at that thought as the vision of my daughter in the hands of the Volturi came back into my mind. “Wow it’s been along time,” I said, “you think they are ok?” “She is in the safest place in the world with Carlisle, he just wanted to talk to her about her emotions, and how to control them.” I nodded as I sat there just staring at the window.
Chp 4 Dangerous Emotions
Carlisle put his arm around my shoulders as we walked out in to the moonlight towards the river. “So I would like to hear your side of the story about what happened.” He said, “and before you start I want you to know that I am not mad at you, I just want to be able to show you the things to look for so that you can be able to control your actions. I wanted to tell you that I know that because you are half-human you do have stronger emotions than we do. It’s ok to have emotions, they are naturally just a part of everyday life, but as you saw tonight, a vampire reaction to human emotions can turn deadly in an instant. I am proud of you for stopping where most others more than likely would have continued until she was dead.” I felt the tears start to well up in my eyes again, “I didn’t want to stop, I wanted to rip her apart,” I said. “Just seeing her there talking to him with that look in her eyes, wanting him, I saw it, and it made me angry seeing his reactions to her, he hugged her.” I stopped, shuddering at the sight in my mind of him wrapping his arms around her. “Will you do one thing for me please,” Carlisle asked, “show me everything that happened, I can sense and understand your feelings better that way.” I put my hands to his face and showed him everything that happened that night. He saw how I felt when Jacob held my hand, when he put his arm around my shoulders, then he felt the hurt I felt that instantly turn to a murderous fury when I saw Jacob smiling and talking to the other girl, seeing the look on her face as she flipped her hair back and blushed while Jacob was talking to her. The rage I felt when she jumped into his arms. He felt how it took everything I had not to tear her head off as I walked up and shoved her through the door. The remorse I felt immediately when I saw how hurt she was, and seeing the expression in Jacob’s face as he ran to her. No, not trying to comfort me but ran to her. I felt the tears running down my face again. “I see,” Carlisle said, “that’s pretty much what I thought happened but I wanted to make sure before I talked to you anymore about your feelings.” He wiped the tears from my face and said, “What you felt was perfectly natural, I am very proud of you for controlling your anger to a point, most wouldn’t have, and they would have acted on their first instinct and gone in for the kill. For example, Esmee one time a very long time ago while she was still a young vampire, out of jealously for me, ripped the throat out of a young woman who was trying to flirt with me. She felt awful, couldn’t believe that she was capable of that, to be able to take a life in an instant. It is something that we all have to deal with. Emotions for a vampire can have deadly consequences. I’m sorry that I hadn’t taken the time to sit down with you and explain this yet. I had been planning on it, just didn’t realize that the time had been now for you to understand about how volatile your emotions could be for you. Especially since your human-half is even more susceptible to emotions than your vampire-half.” “I’m a monster,” I cried, “I almost killed that girl for talking to Jacob.” “No, Renesmee, you are not a monster. A monster would have killed her first and thought about it later. You are special, a special gift to this family. You have so many advantages that we will never have. You are capable of blending in more with everyone else than we are. You can go out into the sun, have a heartbeat, normal skin color, and are warm to the touch.” “Why can’t I just be normal? Please, just change me into a full vampire like everyone else. I hate being the one that’s different. I want to be able to be like you and mom and dad. Will you please do that when I turn 21? Please? I’m begging you. I want to be just like everyone else in the family. Please Dr. Cullen will you do that one thing for me.” I begged him. “For starters, you can call me grandpa seeing as how you are my granddaughter. Second, you will have to talk that out with your parents. I cannot do that without their consent seeing as how that would be something that would change you for the rest of your life.” “But, ya’ll changed my mom into a vampire.” I pleaded. “Only because that was the only way that she would be able to survive after having you, honey.” “See I told you I am a monster, I killed my own mother at my birth.” Carlisle laughed and said, “That was the only way for you to be born and that was your mothers choice so that she could have you. You are her precious little angel, not a monster.” “If I am not a monster then why did Jacob look at that normal human girl the way he did. Why did he laugh and talk to her like it was nothing. I want him to look at me that way, but he doesn’t because I am a monster,” I sobbed. “No honey, it’s not like that. You have to remember that he has watched over you protecting you as you have grown up. He loves you more than you know. He feels the same way about you as you do him. It’s just that you have to remember that you have grown so fast, his feelings for you are changing, just not as fast as yours have. There is more that you won’t be able to understand right now so I’m not going to get into that right now. Just know this, you are the one that he has chosen for his life. Nothing will ever change that.” “Are you sure?” I asked, “It’s just that it doesn’t seem like his actions say that.” “They might not right now,” Carlisle said, “but they are there and they will always be there.” I still wasn’t quite sure what he meant by that but it gave me a little hope for the future. “I just can’t stand not being with him, I miss him right now as we speak” I said. “It’s ok to feel like that honey, that’s some more of your human emotions coming out. Everything is going to work out you just have to be patient and wait for them to happen. These emotions are not ones that can be forced or rushed, they have to evolve on their own,” he said as he kissed my head. We started to walk back toward the house and I stopped. Carlisle turned to see why I stopped. “Does he really love me the way I love him?” I asked. “Yes honey he does, and with time he will be able to show them to you,” he reassured me. I grabbed him up in a huge hug and said, “Thank you grandpa, I really needed this little talk.” “No problem honey,” he replied. I felt a huge relief like a burden had been taken off my shoulders. “Just one thing please,” Carlisle asked, “don’t do anything like that again, if any of our hearts had still been beating they would have stopped when we found out you two were at the hospital, so try to keep a better grip on things ok. None of us could imagine what would happen if anything were to happen to you.” “I know,” I said as we walked arm in arm back to the house. Wow, I wish Alice had not noticed what Charlie had decided. Everyone was waiting on us to get back with worried looks and hugs and ‘don’t ever scare us again like that’. I have never been more embarrassed in my life. Even Rose, who is known for her outbursts of anger, grabbed me in her arms and told me to be careful. “So, was the door metal or wood?” Emmet jokingly asked as he got slapped in the back of the head by 4 hands at once, one of them being Rose’s. “I can’t even believe you would try to joke right now,” Esmee said. “This could have truly been a disaster.” “Geez, I was just trying to lighten things up a little,” he said frustrated. I ran up to him and hugged him saying, “Thank you Uncle Emm, and it was a solid steel door.” “Ouch,” he said, “I guess I won’t have to teach you any self defense moves then, huh?” I just laughed and shook my head. “Quit corrupting my daughter,” mom said rolling her eyes, “come on we need to get you home so you can rest. This has been a long day for you.” “Alright mom, night everybody” I replied as I skipped out the back door and down the path to our house. It was such a relief to get out of there. I couldn’t take anymore stares or comments right now. I only had one thing on my mind, what Carlisle had told me about Jacob choosing me for his life. I wish I knew exactly what he meant by that. Maybe I should ask mom about that later. The only thing I could think about right now was how perfect his body looked especially when he was just running around in his shorts with no shirt on. The perfect muscle tone, that deep dark tan that he has….. ouch! I laugh to myself after I had run into that tree because my mind was not paying attention to what was in front of me, it was only focused on Jacob. My precious Jacob, and if what Grandpa Carl had said was right I was just as precious to him. Pictures of his face kept running through my mind as mom tucked me into bed. I slowly drifted off to sleep hearing Carlisle’s words over and over that Jacob had chosen me. I was dreaming of Jacob running with me over the snowy mountainside when I was awoken by arguing. I lay there silently as I tried to focus on the words being said. “She could have just as easily turned and killed Jacob,” Rose said. “One thought away from an action that she would never forget.” “We know that,” dad said. “We are lucky that she stopped before she killed the girl.” “I’m just saying that her being around him right now may not be the smartest thing for anyone right now,” Rose said. “Give us a chance to think about this,” mom said, “and thank you for letting us know a little more about why you are so apprehensive at times.” What? Not be around Jacob. My one hearts desire and they were thinking about not letting me see him. They wanted to rip the very thing that I love the most out of my life. In a flash I got dressed and climbed out the window running off into the darkness to find Jacob, my Jacob, the one that I loved the most.