The Twilight Saga

Okay this is my first comedy! Disclaimer: All of the characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. In this story Renesmee has already stopped growing and her and Jake hooked up. All the Cullens moved to Alaska, and so did Jake's pack: Embry, Quil, Seth, and Leah, so they will make apperences!





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Chapter 1- Spa day- pov- Bella Cullen
Being immortal isn't all it's cracked up to be. I mean after living for so long things get kind of boring. I was just laying my bed reading Wuthering Heights for the sixty- millionth time.
"Everybody!" my pixie like sister- in- laws voice chimed through the house.
"Ugh!" I moaned removing myself from the comfort of my bed.
I stomped down the steps; Jacob sat on the chair with Renesmee on his lap, her hand intertwined in his. Emmett was sprawled out on the floor Rosalie perched on his stomach. Carlisle and Esme sat on the couch waiting for whatever Alice had to say. Jasper was standing by his wife's side, near the center of attention. Edward was in another chair waiting for me to join him.
Once I sat down Alice began, "Okay now that everyone's here!" she shot me a glare, "I have an announcment." She waited to build up suspense; the only one who really wanted to know was Emmett.
"Okay… wait for it… Spa day!" she cried.
"Ugh!" everybody in the room- except Emmett- sighed.
Emmett thrusted his foot up to Alice and screamed, "Do me Pink!"
Alice slapped his foot away with a, "Not that type of spa!"
"Okay this is how it's gonna work, you will be paired with one person, you will each do each other's make- up however you want. Okay…teams… I'm with Jacob," Jake grimaced, "Jasper's with Esme, Rosalie's with Edward, Renesmee's with Carlisle, and…" There were only two names left, "Bella's with Emmett."
"Crap! Why Alice? Why?" I moaned.
"This is gonna be fun!" Emmett said, rubbing his hands together maniacally.
"You have ten minutes to give your partner a make- over and no using your powers!" she said with a glance toward Edward, "Just to be safe, Bella put your shield over everybody, except for Edward," I heard Edward sigh, as Alice got rid of any loopholes. I drew my shield around the minds of the household, if was effortless now, the 'rubber band' bended to my every will.
"Well I better get back to the hospital." Carlisle said, trying to get out of this torture.
"No you don't!" Alice screeched while grabbing Carlisle's wrist stopping him in his tracks. "I already check your schedule," Carlisle grimaced, "Your stuck here like everybody else!" she seemed all giddy. Stupid giddy pixie.
Emmett decorated my face first. It didn't help my self-consciousness listening to him crack up every time he touched my face with a brush.
"Switch!" chimed Alice.
I opened my eyes while Emmett closed his.
Since Emmett decided to be in the pink mood today, his make- up is going to be Barbie style. I painted bright pink circles on his pale cheeks, with matching hot pink lipstick, florescent pink eye shadow, and I even added mascara with a pink tint to it. I decided to go a little over board and stuck a purple, pink, and blue braided hair extension to his head.
I looked to my fellow ladies and it seemed their idea was practically the same as mine, with the exception of the differences in color, there was green, blue, and purple Barbies to go with Emmett's pink. Carlisle was the only odd one out; he was dressed as Hannah Montana- complete with a blond wig, poor Carlisle. I looked to my own victim and stifled a laugh; he looked ridiculous.
"Ready girls?" Alice asked.
"Yup!" We screamed.
"1…2…3… open!" Alice cried.
The whole room broke out in a laugh fest as we took in each other's faces.
Alice looked ludicrous, she had random colored splotches all over her face. Rosalie looked like a clown complete with a colossal red nose, and a rainbow afro. Esme was painted red, probably based on her furious mood. I turned to look at my daughter, I got extremely enraged… Carlisle had decorated her with scales to match her absurd nickname Nessie; my daughter the Lockness monster. Edward was the purple Barbie I mentioned before, Jake the blue, while Jasper was the green Barbie. Lastly myself, I sprinted to the full length mirror in Alice's bedroom; when I saw my reflection I was utterly horrified.
A mime, Emmett made me a mime! My face was covered in white powder- not because I wasn't pale enough- to give me the chalky complexion mime's were famous for. I was wearing black eyeliner, which made my eyes look like they belong to raccoons, and Jet black lipstick.
"EMMETT!" I thundered, stomping down the steps, shouting foul language with every step I took. Everybody looked away from their mirrors and onto the not so silent mime.

I hope you like it please comment and let me know if I should continue!:) If you come up with any wierd ideas for them to do let me know. Oh and if your bored and what to make me a banner go for it! Thanks! :)Check out my first fan fiction called equinox! Here's a link: http://www.thetwilightsaga.com/group/fanfiction/forum/topics/equino...


chapter 2
chapter 3
chapter 4
chapter 5

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Replies to This Discussion

omg hahahaha plz continue!!!!
hahahahah that was hilarious continue
Thanks you guys! :) This was my first comedy and I wasn't sure how it would play out!
hey girly when are u ganna post more?
I have no clue! I do know what the next chapter will be about though!
thanks Alicia!
OME please write more
That was funny! keep going
Too funny!

You should definitely continue with this!
I ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT. I AM A HUGE EMMETT FAN AND THIS JUST MADE MY DAY!! THANKS SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!
made me laugh today :-)
YOU HAVE TO WRITE MORE SOON!!!! that was hilarious!!!! please hurry!!!!

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