the begining of the end
I was sitting on my bed, it was the 10th of July, I was on page 214 in twilight, Edward was telling Bella how important it was to tell her Dad that she was having a 'date' with him. I paused when I heard the phone ring thinking about answering but decided not to. Try to find my place is when I heard Mom screamed, it was the kind of scream that automatically know something was wrong. In addition, I knew mom she was not the person who freak out because the se a spider or mouse she was someone who grabbed the boot and smashed the bug. Therefore, I was scared; marking my page with the first thing, my hands touched and ran down stairs. Dad was on the phone pacing as he always does, mom was crying, I had never seen her cry so hard, and Johnny was on the floor trying to reach for his bottle on the couch. I handed it to him he sat him on his butt, he stared sucking on it like it was the last bottle of milk he was ever going to have. Something was wrong. About two seconds later Dad hung up the phone grabbed Moms hand and said " she's going to be alright we can leave right now she's at the hospital" Mom look hopeful, but enough to make her look any better I still had no idea what was going on "Mom, what’s wrong, what happened, who's at the hospital?" I asked did not think she would be able to answer I looked at Dad. "Its Teresa she got in a car accident, it looks really bad. But we don't know anything else right now, we're leaving, you can stay home with John." he said. We all looked at Johnny, as if he could make it all better, yes the ten month old had all the answers. Mom was already heading to the door after kissing Johnny’s head. Dad hugged me for only a second and followed moms lead kissing Johnny’s head. I heard the car start and fade away. I looked at Johnny. Then picked him up and sat him next to me on the coach. Got a blanket and stared humming us to sleep. They must have moved us because I woke up in my room, with no Johnny. I checked the clock; it said 9:30am. I stumbled down stairs. Going straight to the kitchen to find something to eat. Looking out the window as I past, Dad’s car was gone, work, I thought he had to have come home. Not interested in food anymore I went to the living room. Johnny was still asleep in his play pin, so I wrapped up in a blanket and turned the TV on. It was not long until the noise woke him up; he started shaking his head back and forth on the blanket. Knowing Mom probably did not get very much sleep last night, I picked him up and carried him to the kitchen, I set him on the counter top while I prepared his formula. I could here the TV on in the living room, the morning news; it was saying something about a car crash, wondering if it was the Teresa I walking in there. “ Three teenage girls on their why home from soccer practice” the news person spoke, I knew right away that he was in fact talking about her, she had practice every Friday. “ the driver died at the hospital last night while the other two are in bad shape but recovering” he continued. Setting Johnny down I walk to the TV and sure enough their was my sisters school picture on the TV screen. She was dead. No that can’t be, my sister, no she always drove safe, I didn’t make sense why. Before I could help it I was crying, I told myself I was wrong and she was just fine, I can’t tell if she was the one in fact who drove it could have been her other friends. Not her. It’s not her time to die, she was going to be a senor this year, I was going to be her freshman sister, she was going to drive me to school. And I wouldn’t have the embarrassment of mom dropping me off in the mini van. But I was wrong I was going to walk in mom and dads room and get this straitened out, I was wrong she was going to be just fine. Still I could help feeling sick to my stomach as I pick Johnny back up and headed up stairs towered their room. Mom was in their not sleeping but sitting up on her bed looking what looked like old baby pictures, her eyes blood shot. Not a good sign. “She’s gone, honey, she gone.” she sobbed. I just shook my head, not wanting what she said to be true. “ mom I-I.” I could finish I just got on her bed and let her hold me.
Its been almost three months sense Teresa died, everyone is starting to get back to normal, whatever normal is. Her funeral was big I guess I lot of people were ‘touched’. It was somewhat nice though seeing how much people cared about her. Dad had a speech saying how much everyone’s’ going to miss her and how good of a person she was, and so on in that range of sense. For almost a month we did not have to make dinner, because people thought it would ‘help out’ and it did, but I could barely eat as it was, and it always feels bad when you throw out food that someone else thought to give you. Tomorrow is the first day of school, high school, I do not feel that nervous like I did previous years. I just wanted school to be over and four more years didn’t seem that long anymore. I went school shopping with my best friend and her mom, they didn’t bring up Teresa, that was nice but I still mad at mom for not coming I know she’s not up for much but using Johnny as an excuse, was wrong because I knew one of Teresa friends offered to watch him. But I can’t blame her on that she doesn’t like talking about Teresa let alone having her friend come over, witch would definitely bring up some emotion she was trying to hide. I had my outfit set out on my desk and I knew it would make me look older, witch is what I’ve been going for. Dad has been working late and leaving early not wanting to be home I guess. Johnny, who barely got a birthday, but was just as happy without one, is now walking and saying words like momma, dada, and Nate, and his all time favorite, no. I like dad have been trying to stay out of the house going over Jess’s house for the ret of the summer half the week I was over there, and if was not I was up in my room or down stairs with Johnny.
Sitting on my bed staring at the reflection of myself in the mirror. People thought I was pretty I guess, not celebrity pretty or anything, I have light brown hair and blue eyes my face is small. Giving that I am barely 5’2, my carrier as a model or anything in that range is out. I looked around my room you could barely see any wall because I had so many poster and pictures up. My bed was small but I like it. I always wished I had a TV in my room so I didn’t have to worry if mom or dad saw me watching a show I knew they would disapprove of, not that they cared much anymore. I pulled out Harry Potter the 5th one, my favorite. And flipped though the pages. Almost everyone wondered and worried over how much I read if I was not reading then I did not have a book in a one-mile radius. Slamming the book down I jumped off the bed and walked out of my room, headed for her room. It wasn’t the first time that I went in here in fact I spent a lot of time in here, it might sound weird, but it helped me remember her. And not for one second did I ever want to forget her, I had to remind myself of the little things she did, like when she used to take me out, I always felt cool to drive with her, I guess it was just made me feel cool or something. Or when she always had some sort of food in her room, her favorite, Kit-Kat bars. Or when she’d tell me about her date and I put myself in her shoe’s pretending I had a date with Dave, the basketball guy. I came in her room to find peace. We didn’t move anything I didn’t move anything, there was still dirty clothes on the floor, her CD’s still spread out on the floor.
“ I’m starting school tomorrow, I hope I don’t get lost or anything, I wish you could be here” I told the her. Don’t think I’m crazy to talk to a room it’s a little like talking to you pet cat, that don’t really know what your saying but it’s still nice to get it out. For me it was a little different, I wasn’t ready for her to go I still I had things to tell her. She’s not hear but maybe she’s still listening, I beat she’s she up in heaven looking down on me and I can just pretend to that she can hear me because it makes me feel better. I sat on the ground feeling the ruffles with my hand letting the tears trickle down my face, without trying to hold them in. after a few minutes I got up tried my tears and walked out and went down stairs. Johnny was in the kitchen banging on pots and pans, normal for him I’m wont be very surprised if he turns out to be a rock star. Mom was making dinner, not normal, I’ve made dinner almost every day of the month. “Mom I don’t mind I can make dinner.” I said to her she jumped a little not hearing me come in with all the banging. “ uh honey its fine you’ve been helping out a lot and I thought I’d give you a break” she said smiling at me. Deciding to set the table instead I went to grab the plates and such. “will dad be home for dinner or is just us?” I asked trying not to sound mean or anything. “I don’t think so honey, just set it for us.” After setting out all the stuff I went and put Johnny in his high chair, and cut up some chicken for him. Mom and I sat down and started eating. It was quiet at first then she broke the silence. “do you have everything ready for tomorrow?” she asked me. “yea everything’s ready to go.” I said trying to sound cheerful. “ I don’t know what I’m going to do with you gone all day I’ve gotten verily used to you being around this summer.” She said, trying to have a good conversation, and not letting me eat in quiet. “Yea, I’m going to miss you both.” Eyeing Johnny when I said it. Johnny smiled one of his award wining smiles at me. “so um mom, are you putting him in day care?” I knew she’d kill me if I said this but I’ve had been taking care of him all summer she’s barley a mom to, the only way of him knowing she was is when I point and say “who’s that?”. “I’ve been a mother for seventeen years, I think I’m quite able to watch my own son Natalee”. She said in a harsh tone. “Sorry I shouldn’t have said anything,” I said. We did not talk for the rest of the evening.
As I stepped on the bus, I felt angry, angry that I was on this smelly loud bus. I was never supposed to have to ride this thing. I was mad at my sister, she broke her promise she wasn’t going to make me ride the bus, she had promised to drive me to school. I was mad at myself for being so selfish. But who else is their to blame.
thanks for reading this just my 1st two chapters i will put out more later.....all copy rights our mine...the picture is mine....so ask before you copy it. :) comment and give advise for the next chapters!!! thanks again ~MaddyMake your own banner at MyBannerMaker.com!