THE DAY BEFORE YOU
Hi there I know you don’t know me, but I would like to tell you a story; it is a love story about a boy and a girl of pain heartache, hope, love, life and death. I have known everyone in this story at some point in time. I feel that their stories deserve to be told.
There once was a little girl named Bella, who had been left alone to grow up with her ill equipped, withdrawn and sad father, Charlie. Bella knew that he loved her, she could see it in the way he tucked her into bed at night, the way he held her hand as he walked her to and from school and the way he held her close as if she might disappear if he ever let her go. In truth Bella was the only good thing left in his life and she alone was what he lived for. As Bella grew Charlie would sadly watch as she left the house; he was always waiting for the day she left and never came home taking with her his one reason for waking up each morning.
Bella was a quiet lonely little girl who did not make friends easily. She had two friends Angela Weber and Jacob Black. Bella sometimes wished for a different life, not a better life, just a different one. She longed for a place where the sun shined bright and she could twirl with arms stretched to the sky. A place where it never rained and all she needed was a good book and the sun on her bare arms was enough to keep her warm.
Bella was the girl picked last for PE, home studying instead of attending the school football game or homecoming dance. She was uncoordinated and tripped over her own two feet. She didn’t play or understand sports. She was shy and tended to stay to herself and she was always the butt of the other kid’s jokes. Bella never took it to heart she knew they picked on her to make themselves feel better about their own faults and shortcomings. So this was Bella’s life.
She had one procession that she kept close to her heart it was a picture of her mother and father on their wedding day. She looked at it every night before going to bed. She would trace her mother’s smiling face with the tip of her finger and marvel at the way her dad looked at her mother. That look was one of pure joy, love and hope. She prayed every night before bed that one day she would find someone who would look at her just like that. She would then put the picture back under her pillow and drift off to sleep. She would float off to a land where the sun shined bright and she twirled with her mom and no rain ever fell.
Somewhere that could have been a million miles away but was really only an hour’s drive away; there lived a boy named Edward. He was a very beautiful boy, yes I said beautiful for there really wasn’t any other word to describe him. He had the face of an angel and the heart of the devil. He had bronze hair that constantly fell in his eyes. His eyes were a golden brown the color of warm butterscotch on most day s but then sometimes they would be pitch black like a storm on the rise. Then as quickly as the storm passed he could dazzle you with a flash of his crooked smile. When he had a good day he could blow you away with that smile and those indescribable sparkling eyes. Unfortunately his good days were few and far between. He sometimes felt as if he didn’t really fit in with his family. He often felt like the odd man out. He lived with Carlisle and Esme Cullen the parental figures of the family; they loved each other so much that you could see it and feel it in everything they did. Edward knew that if they woke up tomorrow and had only each other that they would be okay. Then there was his adopted sister Alice and her husband Jasper. They were amazing to watch as they knew each other so well that words weren’t necessary. They just had to look at each other to know what the other was thinking and it was as if no one else was in the room. It was truly amazing.
Lastly there was his other sister Rosalie and her husband Emmet. Rose was beautiful almost like a goddess. She was also self centered, selfish and rude. However she also had a love for her husband Emmet that ran so deep and true that you forgot her flaws. She had this undying love and loyalty for him.
Emmet was a huge beast of a guy who towered over everyone around him. At first glance everyone was terrified of him, until he smiled and his face transformed into a cuddly teddy bear. He was loud, rowdy and loved to have fun but above all he loved Rose faults and all.
Edward often felt out of place in his own home being surrounded by such happy people. He wondered if he would ever find someone he could call his own, someone who would love him above all else, someone who would complete him and make him whole. He longed to find a love of his to know what it felt like to be someone’s everything.
The chances of this boy and this girl finding one another, was one in a million but fate has a funny way of working things out. Somehow this boy connected with this girl and things just somehow seemed to work out.
Bella and Edward had met and fallen hopelessly in love. Things weren’t all roses and hearts but they weathered the storms that raged against them and came out better for it. Bella found her mother and finally seemed to have everything she ever wanted. Her best friends Angela and Jacob seemed to have been drawn together and seemed happy to be only with each other. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that but she really hadn’t had time to think about it yet. The only thing that seemed to be bothering Bella was telling her father about the arrival of her dead mother. She knew that they desperately loved one another but how would she ever get them together again? And how would she explain the fact that her boyfriend, his family and her mother were all vampires? And let’s not forget that her best friend was a shape shifter, Bella had a long road ahead of her and she had no idea how or where to begin her new journey.
It had been four months since she had been to Italy to save everyone she loved and herself from the Volturi. She had found more strength than she had thought possible and she with the help of her dead mother had defeated the powerful group of evil, blood thirsty and arrogant vampires. Well not really defeated they were still there and could get reinforcements and come back but that was something that they hoped would not happen for many years. Jasper was also making contingency plans just in case.
For the most part Bella was happy except that she hated lying to her dad. She knew he was trying to be more involved in her life but why now? Did he sense that there were things she didn’t tell him like her mom was here living with the Cullen’s and that her Edward and his family were not human? She wished she could tell him everything but would he understand? She wasn’t sure that he would be able to accept this underworld that seemed so unbelievable but was all too real.
So this is where our story begins. The story of such amazing love that no one would ever have imagined but were always meant to be. Bella and Edward, Renee and Charlie and Angela and Jake and maybe a few more thrown in; what will the fates have in store for each of them now?
I was sitting with Angela in last hour PE today was the day we got to listen to Ms Nichols, aka Coach T, talk about STD’s and how having premarital sex could only end badly. Angela and I rolled our eyes toward the ceiling wondering how she could stand in front of so many teenage boys and not feel completely stupid. I glanced at the clock on the wall and sighed in relief only ten more minutes and this torture would be over. Angela and I had made plans to go shopping after school for the homecoming dance. I really wasn’t that excited about the dance because I can’t dance but Edward seemed to be determined that we go. So here I was going shopping with Ang, Alice and Rose after school. The guys were going to go hunting and would probably not be home until Friday and today were only Tuesday. I hated it when Edward was away for that long but I knew it was a necessity. I was brought back to reality with the ringing of the final bell.
“Thank God that is finally over.”
I nodded my head in agreement with Ang as we began to stretch and work the kinks out of our backs from sitting so long.
“I know right. Okay so I am heading home and I know Jake will be waiting outside for you but please do not be late Alice will kill you. Be at my house at 3 no later than 3:30.”
“Why the extra 30 minutes?”
“Because Ali will have to redress me and you know she loses all track of time.”
We both started laughing as Ang took off running to go meet Jake outside.
I grabbed my back pack and headed to my locker to exchange my health book and The Benefits of Abstinences pamphlets for my battered copy of Romeo and Juliet. I was about to slam the door shut when I felt someone grabbing me from behind and pulling me close. I leaned into the embrace knowing that it was Edward.
“Hey you, how was Spanish?”
“Boring, how was sex Ed with Coach T?”
“Oh I learned a lot about why not to have sex, as if I had to worry about that.”
“Bella we have been through this before you know why I can’t even think about that.”
“Yeah I know and it’s ok, I think about it enough for both of us. I just wish I didn’t have to sit there and listen to all the reasons that don’t apply to me. Okay so when are you guys leaving?”
“Any minute I just wanted to walk you out and say bye and for the record I do think about you in that way too. Love there has never been anyone else and there never will be so I do understand how you feel, trust me.”
“I’m sorry for sounding so selfish and I know it’s just hard for you so let’s just forget about it for now.”
I took his hand as we walked down the hall. I couldn’t keep myself from staring at him from the corner of my eye. I still couldn’t believe that he was mine forever sometimes I would think that it was all some crazy dream or a cruel joke and one day I would wake up alone or he would tell me that he never loved me at all. I know I sound completely insane but bad things always seem to happen to me.
“Hey are you okay Bella?”
I blinked my eyes in surprise we had made it to my truck and I suppose he had been talking to me. I smiled and nodded my head yes.
“I ‘m good sorry I was daydreaming.”
I could see the questions in his eyes and an amused smile playing on his lips. I was lost in his gaze and had to focus to put two words together coherently.
“Well sort of but not really, anyways it doesn’t even matter. So what were you saying before I zoned out on you?”
“I was telling you how much I was going to miss you and to have fun with the girls.”
“Yeah I will except I am not looking forward to Bella Barbie.”
I could hear his deep laughter floating in the air. He knew how overzealous Alice could be when it came to fashion, hair, makeup and accessories.
“I’m sorry but it will be fun and you know it. So promise me you will be careful until we get back no sneaking around or meetings with werewolves?”
“I promise but Angela and Jake will be coming over some so don’t get all worked up. Jake is more calm now with Angela around he would never do anything to hurt her.”
I could see Edward’s forehead wrinkled in thought and worry.
“Yeah I am sure that was what Emily thought about Sam too.”
I knew Edward was right about that but the time; place and circumstances had been entirely different. I was sure that nothing like that would happen with Jake and Angela.
“Edward please don’t worry about me. I will be fine and if it makes you feel better I will ask Alice to come over while Jake is there.”
“Fine but promise you will take care of my heart.”
“I will if you promise the same.”
I could see Emmett and Jasper walking across the parking lot with Rose and Alice. I leaned into Edward and kissed him solidly on the lips while tangling his hair in my fist. I wanted to make sure he thought about me and missed me as much as I was going to miss him. As far as thinking about him, well he had the center stage in the deep crevices of my mind. I loved him and I found myself wondering how I ever got along without him. I reluctantly released my hold on him as I felt Alice pulling me away. I smiled at Edward as he flashed the crooked smile that melted my heart and took my breath away.
“Bella come on we have things to do and places to be so let’s get moving. I will follow you home and then you and Angela can ride with us to the mall. Hurry up.”
“Okay I am leaving. “
I waved at Edward and the guys as he was helplessly being pulled to Emmett’s jeep. I saw him manage to break free and run back to the open door of my truck, he leaned in and gave me a quick kiss the cheek and whispered in my ear, “I love you Bella, please be safe and take care of you.”
I held him for a second before Em and Jazz came back to drag him to the jeep. I laughed at the sight of the three of them making complete fools of themselves as if no one else was even around.
I watched as Bella’s truck passed by on her way to the exit. I could see her face creasing in laugher at the sight of us wrestling over the front seat. We were like a bunch of kids who had called dibs at the same time and no one was willing to give in. I knew we must look ridiculous but I honestly didn’t care what anybody thought anymore. I was in love and that was something I never thought would happen to me. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to fall in love it was just that the only person I wanted to love me was human. I never imagined that Bella the reason for my very being would love me back. I knew I had been selfish to come here and seek her out but I had and lucky for me she loved me as much as I loved her. I can still remember all the years before Bella entered my life and how cold and empty they were. I had never thought that such light and beauty existed but then Bella had flashed across my sky and brought so much joy and light into the darkness that had been my life, that I had been blinded to anything but her. I had watched her from a far as she had grown and started her life but I could see that she was as lost and alone as I seemed to be. I longed to be with her, to protect her and keep her safe from all the pain and hurt that this world would bring. Bella was seemed to be so fragile and delicate I wanted to shield her from all the realities that would come. I can’t really explain it but somehow I felt this pull to be near her to be with her no matter the consequences of my actions. I would never put Bella in danger and the very thought of Bella being hurt because of me tore at my very being and I tried so desperately to keep her safe. I had thought that I would swoop in like a knight in shining armor and save the day how mistaken I had been. I had planned everything perfectly making all the necessary arrangements for Bella and Jacob to be safe, to disappear if need be but in the end it had been Bella who had saved me. I could still see her standing there with her arms outstretched raising her hands as Jane had been lifted off of her feet and her face constricted in pain. I had waited for decades to see her get a taste of her own medicine and to see my Bella giving it to her was so sweet. I was so proud of Bella she was so much stronger than I had given her credit for. I knew that she could take care of herself if it came to that but I still had the overwhelming desire to protect her and keep her safe. I knew what my life had been like before she came crashing into it and I so did not want to go back there. I would walk the ends of the earth to keep her safe and to keep her with me forever. Forever that was a big word because for me it wasn’t just a word it was my life. I wanted to spend every day of eternity with Bella and yet still she thought she wasn’t good enough or that I might change my mind. She never said this to me but I could see it as the sadness settled in her eyes, in her facial expression, the set of her shoulders as if the weight of the world rested there and in the way she would look away suddenly as if she was fighting off the tears that were about to fall. I had no idea how to convince her that she was stuck with me and that I was never going to leave her; so I would show her by telling her everyday that I loved her and that I was the luckiest vampire that ever was because I had her and I never wanted to go back to the day before I heard her sweet name and saw her beautiful face. I was lost in her and I never wanted to be found.
“Look Jazz, he’s only been away from Bella for ten minutes and he’s already lost in a daydream. I swear I was never that bad even in the beginning. Man Edward you are so gone I don’t think anyone will ever find you again.”
“Shut Emmett and give him a break. You know we’ve been where he is now so let him enjoy it.”
“Jazz I remember waking up from a bear attack and seeing the most beautiful face I had ever seen but I was nowhere near as gone as our boy Edward here.”
“Em you know as well as I do you were completely mesmerized by Rose and you would have done anything just to be next to her, I may not have been there but I have heard the stories.”
“Well don’t be so smug because I have heard the stories about you when you met Alice.”
“Believe me I remember how crazy I was when Alice found me. I was totally lost in her eyes. I was like who is the amazing creature who seems to know me so well and I had never laid eyes on her before. I had no idea who she was but all I did know was that I would follow her anywhere. When she walked into the diner and called my name I was lost to her forever. My life has never been the same and I cannot imagine ever going back to the day before I met her.
I’ll be the first to admit that I am completely in love with Alice and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Thanks Jazz for coming to my defense but I can fend for myself. Em it is very simple I love Bella and everything she has added to my life. I feel as if my eyes have been opened after being shut for too long. I just can’t explain it any better but when I think of her, which is every second of every day I find myself smiling. So screw you Em because when we get home I think I will have a chat with Rose and we’ll see who’s in the doghouse and it won’t be me or Jazz.”
“Okay fine but I still think its funny how you get that look in your eye and that goofy grin on your face. I never thought I would see the day that you, Edward Cullen would be so light hearted and so not scary. Jazz he is going to give us a bad name. I swear who would be scared of that face?”
I had had enough of listening to Emmett so I decided now was a good time to change the subject.
“Okay if we are finished discussing the reasons for my good humor can we get some tunes on? I would much rather hear some music than listen to this any longer.”
I watched as Jazz grabbed a Linkin Park disc and shoved it into the co player. I rested my feet on the console that sat between the front seats and with my hands behind my head as I began to relax and sing numb at the top of my lungs. I knew I was getting on their nerves but so what? They deserved whatever I wanted to dish out, this should be a very fun expedition so let the games begin.
I groaned as Alice combed and pulled my hair until I thought it would all fall out. Finally she was done. I got up from the chair and went to the mirror in the bathroom. I was surprised but it was really cute. She had curled the ends and pulled it into a loose ponytail that was simple yet stylish. I was impressed at the effect it at on the shape of my face. The make- up enhanced my eyes and made them seem mysterious and sensual. I had changed into a pair of jeans and a very cute sweater. I suppose Alice approved or she didn’t want to argue with me anymore today. I heard a car out front and looked out the window to see Angela and Jake. I waved at them and turned around to run down stairs.
“Come on Alice, Ang and Jake are here.”
Alice was grumbling along behind me.
“Why is Jacob Black here?”
“He’s not going with us he is just staying here until his dad gets here for dinner with Charlie.”
“Whatever let’s just get out of here fast before the smell kills me, okay?”
I rolled my eyes as I ran down the porch steps as the screen door slam behind me. I stopped at the end of the walk and grabbed Jake in a hug. I hadn’t seen or spent any time with Jake in months.
“Hey Bells I missed you too.”
I was laughing as he spun me around in circles. I pushed away making him set me back on the ground.
“I know it has been a while, but I know you have Angela now so I’m sure you have been just fine.”
“As I know Edward has been taking care of you.”
I noticed that he sounded as if he was in pain as he said Edward and he had that look again. I sighed and tried to reign in my ill thoughts. I wish Jake would just give Edward a chance but he still did not approve of Edward or any of the Cullen’s for that matter. As if to prove my point I heard him growling under his breath as Rose and Alice came out of the house. I gave him my fiercest look as they approached us.
I could see Rose scrunching up her nose as she stood across from Jake and Alice was out and out glaring at him. I had thought they had all gotten over this stupid, childish feud, guess not.
“Okay ladies are we ready to go?”
“Yes Alice we are let’s give Ang a minute.”
I linked an arm one with Alice and one with Rose and began to walk towards the car. I knew Ang wanted to say a proper goodbye without an audience. As we climbed into the car I began to admonish Alice and Rose.
“Can you two please play nice? This is really hard for Angela as it is without you two acting so immature. Besides she knows about you guys and you don’t see her treating you like lepers do you?”
I could see that Alice and Rose both looked a little regretful and knew they would try to be more polite next time, for Angela’s sake. I rolled my eyes as I waited impatiently for our shopping trip to begin. I slid over to make room in the back for Angela as she climbed in beside me she still had that dopey look on her face. I swear ever since she hooked up with Jake she always seemed to have that look in her eyes at just the mention of his name. I suppose I didn’t have any room to talk because I knew how I got when it came to Edward. Oh how much do I love him, well that is almost impossible to say without inventing a new word. I suppose I love him to infinity and beyond. I could never imagine a day without him by my side or a night without his loving arms holding me tight. I missed him already and he probably wasn’t even out of Forks yet. Oh well at least we could dish about the guys without them overhearing us.
“Okay so who wants to go first?”
I could feel the questions floating around in the air around us. I guess I would be the one to start the girl talk.
“I want to start the gab fest with one statement I love Edward Cullen and please do not get mad at how many times I mention his name, okay? Sorry Rose and Alice I know he’s your brother but I happen to be in love with him so get used to it. Okay so Ang spill tell us something we don’t already know about you and Jake.”
I could see Angela trying to compose her words before speaking to us. She was so funny how she had to be so precise and so grammatically correct all the time. I stared at her waiting for her answer.
“Okay you guys know that Jake and I have been together for like four months or so right?”
We all looked at her and nodded our heads in agreement who would ever forget that day? That had been the day Edward and I had reconciled and he had agreed to change me eventually. I would forever remember that day.
“Well I never told Jake about our conversation Bella. You swore me to secrecy so I never told him that I knew about the legends or that I knew he was a shape shifter. He is so cute the way he tries to tell me and then he gets so nervous he changes the subject. I wonder do you guys think I should tell him or let him suffer until he decides he’s tired of waiting. “
“Wow Ang I would let him off the hook and tell him already. H e loves you that much I am sure of.”
I could see Angela taking in every word. I felt kind of bad for her and for Jake. I was sure that he had had many late night conversations with his dad. I could almost see him trying to figure out how to tell Ang about imprinting and finding out she already knew.
“Ang I really think you should tell him and I wouldn’t put it off much longer. I can’t even begin to imagine how much closer you will be when he isn’t worrying about your reaction. Oh Ang you have to tell him when we get back, promise.”
I could see her smiling face as she nodded her head in agreement. Then Rose with her blunt manner asked the question we had all been avoiding, “So Ang how does Ben feel about all of this?”
I could see her smile beginning to fade at the very mention of Ben’s name. I glared at the back of Rosalie’s head. I knew this was a touchy subject for Angela. I really felt sorry for her. She and Ben had seemed so perfect for one another until Jake had come between them. Of course we all knew the reason how and why it had happened but to everyone in the real world it had seemed cold and callous so unlike Angela. I watched as so many emotions flashed across her face until the sadness settled in her eyes. Then very slowly and quietly she began to speak.
“I had no idea that Ben had so many feelings for me. I hated the look on his sweet face when I told him about Jake. I have never hurt anyone as much as I hurt Ben. I see him walking down the halls at school or sitting at our old table at lunch and I feel sad. Sometimes I hear a song and I think of him and what we were doing the first time I heard it and I know if I feel these things then I know he must feel even more than I do. I mean I have Jake and I love him and I can’t not be with him even if I wanted to be with Ben it would never happen because I am bound to Jake now. I just feel so bad for Ben because he such a great guy and he so doesn’t deserve this pain. I wish he didn’t look at me as if I had broken his heart and that I didn’t have to see him every day that makes it so much worse. I can’t help but be happy and I know he sees me and wonders how I got over him so fast, man this really sucks.”
“Angela it’s not your fault and besides this is high school and people break up and move on every day. Give him time he will find someone else.”
“That’s just it Bella I feel like if it hadn’t been for this whole bizarre imprint thing that Ben could’ve been the one and now I guess I’ll never know. I want him to be happy but part of me wants him to always miss me too.”
“Oh Ang that’s just normal and totally human feelings. I promise that things will work out you’ll see.”
“I agree with Bella there isn’t anything wrong in what you’re feeling right now. Besides it’s not like you asked for any of it so it sucks for you too. I mean come on Ang you got stuck loving and being devoted to a mutt forever that really sucks.”
I could hear the teasing in Alice’s voice as she tried to take Angela’s mind off of Ben and lighten the intense atmosphere in the car. I was still glaring daggers at the back of Rose’s head not that she noticed. I couldn’t believe she had brought the subject of Ben up how rude. Oh yeah I am talking about Rosalie Rude Hell Cullen. I leaned forward and turned the stereo on and leaned back letting my head fall against the seat. I leaned over and gave Ang a hug before settling back into my spot. I knew this was going to be one adventurous shopping trip. I closed my eyes and thought about Edward as I let the sound of Linkin Park feel my ears. I was humming along with In The End as Edward danced in my mind oblivious to Alice and Rose bickering in the front seat.
Thanks so much for reading and glad you liked it.
Hi Indiadoe thanks so much glad you like it. I left the link on your page but here it is again.
I will have next chapter up I lost chapters 3,4 and 5 so I am having to rewrite them from memory the rest are still on my computer so they won't take long to repost. I will have it up tonight!!
I had been away from Bella for two and a half days and it felt like an eternity. The strange thing was that even though I was away from her she was still with me. Just when I would feel my good humor begin to fade some small insignificant thing she had done or said popped in my head and I found myself grinning from ear to ear. I could see her in my mind and I was overcome with a sense of peace. I missed Bella so much that I found myself counting the minutes and seconds until I would hold her in my arms again. As I reflected on the sense of peace that had overcome me at the mere thought of her I realized that it was different now. I no longer felt I had to be with her to keep her from disappearing. I know that whether I am right by her side or a hundred miles away that she loves me still and I know she will be there when I return with her arms open wide. The simple truth was that we were connected and we belong together. I suppose I had always known that it would come to this, even though I had feared that I would ultimately be the death of Bella in reality we had saved each other.
I gazed at the river running below me and the beautiful landscape surrounding it. The river's edge was surrounded by trees of every shape and size that stretched as far as the eye could see. I could see their reflection in the ebb and flow of the water as if they went on forever. The view was breathtaking but even it didn't compare to what I saw when I looked at Bella. She was everything to me now. It seemed as if I could see her presence in everything and everywhere I looked. I could see her beauty, kindness and never ending love reflected in every cloud that filled the sky, in every flower petal that hit the ground and in every newborn butterfly as it stretched its wings and flew for the first time. She was the very best part of me and she was all that I needed. When I think of her I feel so much love, admiration and devotion for her and when I look in the endless depth of her eyes I see it reflected back. When I see myself in her eyes I no longer see the monster I had once been and I wonder how I ever lived without her in my life.
I could hear Jazz and Em laughing behind me as they made their way to where I stood. I knew they would be teasing me and rubbing it in how gaga I had become over a girl a human girl at that. I was getting used to their ribbing but I still got a little defensive when they called Bella just a fragile little human. She was fragile but she was also the only thing that I couldn’t live without. I loved her to the ends of the earth and back again. I knew there wasn’t anything that I wouldn’t do for her, no place that I wouldn’t go for her and there was no way I would ever stop loving her. The only thing I had to worry about was her stubborn nature and what was going on in her head. I knew she wanted us to share every part of our lives together and I wanted that too. I knew that we could never be completely together until she was no longer a weak and mortal girl. I knew how she felt for I longed for the day when she and I never had to be a part; for the day when she would never have to leave my side to go home or wait for me while I was hunting. I wanted her to be in every aspect and ever part of my life. I didn’t want to have any secrets. I was looking forward to the day that I would call Bella my wife. I wish there was some way that I could be human and have a normal life with a job, a house, the white picket fence a dog and kids who would someday give us grandkids as we grew old together sipping lemonade on the front porch swing . I knew that would never happen so I had accepted that once Bella had graduated I would turn her and we would have forever together. We would cherish yesterday, live today and dream forever together. I glanced at my watch and saw that if I left right now I could be waiting in Bella’s truck when she got of PE. I was tired of wasting my time here when here was obviously not where I wanted to be.
“Hey look Jazz he’s right where I said he would be lost in another daydream so pay up.”
“Em have you are as subtle as a ton of bricks falling from the sky. I wonder why we keep you around,”
“That my dear brother is because I provide muscle and comic relief so what more could you ask for?”
“What more in deed.”
I could see Jazz shaking his head in defeat, there really wasn’t any getting around Emmett’s misguided logic so more times than not we just agreed with him. I was laughing at the put out look on Jazz’s face. I really didn’t mind the bet or the fact that I was a raving lunatic because the only thing that matter to me was Bella. I knew that Jazz and Em had been in the same place before they met Alice and Rose and that whether they admitted it or not that they both knew exactly how I felt.
“Em keep ribbing me and I’ll have little talk with Rose when we get home. I remember how you looked at her when you first saw her. You were scared, unsure of what had happened to you but as soon as you laid eyes on Rose you just stopped fighting.”
I could see the look on Em’s face at the sound of Rose’s name and I knew he missed her. He might act like he didn’t but he did. Jazz punched him on the shoulder as he ran by.
“Better watch out Rose won’t be happy to hear how you’ve been acting when she wasn’t around.”
Em looked at Jazz with his fiercest scowl. “Well I have heard the stories about you when you met Alice so you’re no better.”
Jazz laughed. “Oh I don’t deny it meeting Alice was the best thing that ever happened to me and I miss her terribly. I still remember when she walked in that Café and I had no idea who she was but I would have followed her anywhere and well I did; that’s how I ended up with you two idiots for brothers.”
I laughed as they wrestled around on the ground. I loved my brothers but I feared they had no idea how different my love for Bella was. She was human and that was something they had never encountered so how could they possibly fully understand. I didn’t get the happily ever after and the relationship that they had without Bella becoming like me and that wasn’t something I wanted for her. She has such a beautiful soul and I couldn’t fathom taking that away from her. I couldn’t imagine what would make her want to give up her life for this cold never ending existence but I knew I would if the position were reversed give up everything to be with her. I also knew by not considering her wants and needs I was being hypocritical but she was too important to waste her life on me.
I followed Jazz and Em to the edge of the forest and stopped. I knew that here was not where I wanted or needed to be so I looked at my brothers and smiled. I needed to be with Bella and that was all there was to it.
“Guys I have to go.”
Emmett looked at me as if I had fallen and bumped my head. “Edward come on you can't ditch us.”
I shrugged my shoulders and looked at him somewhat apologetically. “Sorry I’m just not really here so I figured I mind as well go home.”
Jazz pounded me on the back. “Don’t worry about it go on." Tell Bella hi for us.”
I nodded at Jazz and turned to face a sulky Emmett. “Em I’m letting you off easy if I stayed I’d beat you to the top of that mountain.”
Emmett looked at me and snarled. “I doubt that bro you’ve grown soft since Bella. I swear you’re giving vampires a bad name, you couldn’t scare anyone with that love sick face.”
I nodded. “I know man, I know.”
Em gave me a nod and laughed. “Look dude I’m kidding. I love Bella and if you want to go then go just be careful. I don’t want to have come bail you out of jail for wrecking somebody’s car.”
I wasn’t sure what he was talking about .”Em I’m not even driving so how would I cause and accident?”
Em laughed. “When you’re daydreaming of Bella and run out in to the street, don’t call me.”
I shook my head as I hit the tree line running.
I knew it was dangerous and stupid to go to town but regardless here I was in the middle of the square at noon. Charlie was as predictable as the rising and setting of the sun and he would be making his drive through the town square in twenty minutes. I felt as if I were still the young wife of the town police chief as I walked up and down the sidewalk looking in the windows of the faded vintage clothing shops, the antique and thrift stores as well as the general store. I was growing restless and walked into Tiffany’s Treasures just to browse and kill some time. I certainly didn’t want to draw unwanted attention to myself so I wore gloves and a hat low on my head and avoided making direct eye contact. I knew it was cloudy and that the rain would begin at any minute, I could feel the rain that would be pouring in a few short minutes. I ached to see Charlie to see the man he had become to put a face with the boyish one that was still alive in my head even after all this time.
I could feel the clerk’s eyes on me as I walked along the perimeter of the shop and lightly touched pictures and ran a finger over the channel throws. I walked along the glass case at the front counter and felt my mouth drop at the beautiful broach that lay on the black velvet. It was a cameo and it looked exactly like the one my mother had given me on my sixteenth birthday it had been my great grandmothers. I knew it couldn’t possibly be the same but I had to have it. I waved the young girl over and pointed out the broach. She removed it and handed it to me. I studied and marveled at its simple beauty and I told her I would take it. I watched as she accepted my money and wrapped the broach in a box with tissue paper before placing it in a bag. I took and smiled as I head to the bench on the sidewalk to wait for Charlie.
I wondered if he ever thought of me or wondered what our lives would have been like had I not died so long ago. I had never thought I might have this chance to return to Forks or to know my daughter. I had loved my Bella and protected her in my own way all these years but to see her and to hold her close to my now silent heart was so much more than I had ever dared dream for. I now found myself wishing that I could know Charlie again. I knew he was no longer the boy I had met so long ago and fallen madly in love with but he was still Charlie and I knew I would always love him. If only he could somehow know me and accept me for what I am now but I would never put him in that position to have to chose me or his life, his home and the only way of life he had ever known. Suddenly I felt my body humming as if an electric current was running like wildfire through my cold hard body and I knew he was near. I looked up to see the cruiser pulling around the block and despite the slow steady rain that was beginning to fall I could see him through the window of the car and I felt my breath catch and my hands tremble; it wasn’t the cold wet rain or the cool winter breeze it was seeing Charlie. I wondered if he could feel the pull the electric buzz that was floating around me almost willing me to get up and walk across the square to be near him. I could see his thick head of dark hair and the maturity in his face as it had aged over the last sixteen plus years but his eyes were still the same. I could get lost in the depths of those soul searching eyes and never care if I was ever found. I had to fight against the pull to run to him and say it’s me Charlie it’s me. I rose from the bench and watched as he turned the corner and passed by where I stood. I knew he felt the pull as he slowed the car and turned his head to stare longingly at me for a brief moment before I ran down the sidewalk and disappeared into the shadows as the cold pounding rain. When I reached the woods I ran as faster than the wind and wished that the rain on my face was the tears that I felt in my heart.
As the final bell rang I followed Angela into the locker room to change. I had made a complete fool of myself in my feeble attempts to play tennis. Mike had been my partner and he had actually managed to win two out of three rounds with absolutely no help from me. I had fallen and scrapped my knee but it had barely left a mark. I grabbed my clothes and sat down on the bench to change and wondered where Edward was and what he was doing. I feared that he hadn’t missed me half as much as I had missed him. I longed to see his face and to know he hadn’t lost the fight with a wily mountain lion or a grumpy grizzly.
“Bella are you okay?”
I tied my converse and looked at Angela as she pulled her gorgeous hair into a sleek black ponytail. She was so pretty even without trying. I ran a self-conscious hand through my messy hair. I knew it didn’t matter what I looked like Edward wasn’t here so who was I trying to impress.
“I’m okay I’m just missing Edward.”
Angela nodded her head in understanding even though I knew as well as she did that Jake was waiting outside. “Listen Bella he’ll be home soon and it’s Friday so why don’t Jake and I come over and we can watch movies or something?”
Bella hated beign a third wheel but she would like the company. She looked at Angela’s smile and knew she would show up with or without her consent. “If’ you guys don’t have other plans that would be great.”
Angela grabbed her bag and walked toward me. “We’ll be there around seven?”
“Sounds perfect and Angela thanks.”
Angela stopped by me and gave me a one-armed hug. “We’ll rent some videos and see you then.”
I nodded and watched as she left the room. I quickly grabbed my back pack and headed for my locker. I knew it was raining as I heard another clap of thunder echoing through the empty halls. I grabbed my raincoat and saw the abstinence pamphlets in the bottom of my locker. I began to think of Edward and wondered if ever really thought me that way. I seriously doubted he did or that he had any idea how hard it was for me to imagine ever being with someone like him so perfect and beautiful. I knew he had known los of girls and I knew he said he had never but what if he had but was afraid to tell me? I could almost imagine the beautiful woman he had been with over the years and my stomach ached at the thought of them and then of me. I knew I couldn’t compete with any of the beauties he had encountered over the years. I sighed as I slammed my locker and listened to it echo through the now empty halls. I watched the angry flashes of lightening dance across the darkened sky and pushed the door open and ran out into the cold pelts of water. I dashed clumsily across the lot until I jerked the door of my truck open and slid inside. I slammed the door closed and immediately knew I wasn’t alone. I took a deep breath in and smelled the unique scent of Edward as I flung myself across the seat and in to his waiting arms. I could hear him chuckle as I wrapped my arms around his neck and clung to him for dear life.
“I guess that means you missed me too.”
I could hear myself laugh and I nodded my head against his chest. I refused to release my hold on him. I marveld at the warmth I felt in his cool touch and the peace that filled my heart just having him near. I finally pushed myself away to look at him and to see that he was here and that he was okay.
“Of course I missed you. So why are you home so early?”
Edward watched my face and I squirmed away to the driver’s side to avoid his probing eye. “Well I found myself looking at the most beautiful mountains and flowing river and it didn’t hold a candle to the beauty I see when I look at you. I wanted to be here so I left early much to Emmett’s grumbling but if you don’t want me here I can always leave.”
I reached across the seat and grabbed his hand before he opened the door. “Do not open that door. I never said I didn’t want you here as a matter of fact here is just fine with me.”
I leaned across the seat to meet him half way as his lips crushed mine. I could feel the passion in his lips and I ached to be closer but all too soon he brought the kiss to an end. I sighed as he began to argue his case again but all I heard was ‘Bella I don’t want you that way’ and those nagging voices began to fill my head with what ifs and whys. As Edward continued to talk I jammed the key into the ignition and started the truck and headed for home. I watched the dark clouds rolling and knew my heart was as stormy as the vision in my windshield.
Thanks Tonya I will have chapter four up later today or tonight and maybe chapter five too. After that I have the rest on my computer saved! thanks for reading and I'm so glad you like it.
Finally caught up! Sarah I can only say this in three words.
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am hoping for more soon!'
Hi RJ thanks so much I am glad to see you back and thanks so much for reading and liking it.