The Twilight Saga

Preface

As Bella sat staring out her bedroom window life continued on as if no one was aware of her broken heart.  She really had no concern for what time of year it was or what the world was doing outside her bedroom window; the only thing on her mind was Edward and why he had chosen to leave her.  She had loved him with her whole heart and every fiber of her being but it hadn’t been enough he left her anyway.  She had tried to lie and convince herself that she had been better off without him but she knew the truth.  The truth was she would never be the same, could never be the same without him. So instead of venturing out to start a new life and moving on as everyone had told her to she sat curled up in her chair and watched life go on outside her window trying to live the memories they had shared.   Alice had been by her side and had tried to tell her that Edward loved her and that the only reason he had left was because he had honestly thought it was best for her, safer for her.  Bella blamed herself for everything that had went wrong and she blamed herself for the fact that in the end he had gotten himself killed anyway.   He had left leaving her behind and not only that but he had tried to take everything that would remind her of him, but he couldn’t take her heart.  Her heart remembered every touch, every kiss and every moment spent with him and she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loved her, had always loved her.  With that knowledge she and Alice had ran as fast as possible to Italy to try and stop him from making the most ultimate of sacrifices but they had been too late.  He had stood in the middle of the plaza in the glaring high noon sun amid thousands and thousands of humans as they sat, stood and froze at the vision before them.  Edward in the sunlight had been beautiful, magnificent.  He was like a god, with rainbow shards glimmering on the sidewalk and reflecting off the windows, sparkling like a diamond.   Of course the Volturi couldn’t let that happen so he had been seized immediately and taken beyond the palace gates to never be seen again.  The crowds began to murmur but in the end they had been led to believe that it had all been an illusion, a trick of the brilliant  sunlight.  Bella and Alice had arrived just a minute too late.  As they had raced as fast as they could down the corridors and up the winding steps that led them to the colorless, cavern like room that held him they could hear his tortured screams as his life ebbed away.  As they barged into the room they saw him lying in the floor with his life already gone, his body a crumbled heap on the floor.  Bella had held what was left him in her arms and cried hysterically begging for someone, anyone to bring him back to her for she knew she could live without many things but to live without the hope of ever seeing him again was impossible.  She had already tried to live without him once and it hadn’t worked and she knew it wouldn’t work now for now all hope was gone, dead in her arms.  Here she sat on the cobblestone floor with the pieces of her one true love in her arms knowing that from that moment forward she would never see his tousled bronze hair, his crooked smile or the love that would shine so bright in his eyes that it was impossible to see anything else.    She had held him until the guards had taken him away and she smelled the fire and knew that her life as she had known it was over.   So now here she was a lifeless entity with no thought of living but just barely existing.  She was a shell of the person she had once been.  She asked herself every day how had it ended like this?  How was she supposed to go on now?  She had given up on life and only wanted to live in her dream world where Edward was as alive as he had ever been.  As she drifted further and further away Edward watched her and ached to ease her pain.  He only asked for one more day with her or even just an hour he just needed to take her pain away.  He too blamed himself for everything that had happened and only wanted to tell Bella that somehow, someway everything would be okay, that she would be okay.

 

  Edward never intended to enter Bella’s room, but he could see her curled up on her bed with tears still drying on her cheeks.  She was clutching an old Harvard sweatshirt that had once been his.  He was drawn inside by the very smell of her drifting through the open window; how many times had he been here before?  How many nights had she left her window cracked for his late night entries?  He wondered if she did this out of habit or in hope that he would somehow come back.  He quietly swung his legs over the window seal and lowered himself soundlessly inside.  The room was exactly as he remembered it.  The soft sweet floral scent of her lingered in the air and just seemed to pull him in.  He could see her Chap Stick and hair clasps strewn on the vanity; she had never been very organized.   He laughed as the memories filled his mind, Bella looking for her keys or searching for her i-pod.  As he continued to scan the room his gaze settled on a corner shelf and he felt his chest tighten.  It wasn’t the deep blue corsage from prom or the crumbled movie tickets from their one and only attempt at a normal date nor was it the baseball from their very first date but it was the 5 x10 framed photos.  He could see Bella in his mind’s eye chewing on her bottom lip and how she had objected to having her picture taken.  He had tried to take everything that might cause her unnecessary pain when he left but Bella had clung to every memory like a lifeline.  He could see the rocking chair where he had sat so many nights and watched her sleep.  How many times had he sat in that very chair and wished to be a part of her world rather than his own?  He crossed the room and saw his Cullen family baseball cap on her bed post.  He realized that there were traces of him everywhere, as if she refused to let him go.  He quickly gathered all these left over reminders and placed them beside the window as if their absence would wash away all memory of him.  He had been wrong to think that she would ever let go or forget so easily.  He now stood by her bedside and watched the soft moonlight illuminate her perfect face.  He could see the faint tracks where her tears had fallen before sleep had finally taken over.  His poor Bella, she would always be his Bella and it made his very being ache to see her in such turmoil.  Edward tried to imagine what it would be like to never see her again, to envision her with someone else but the vision just wouldn’t come.  He couldn’t think of her as anything but his, she would always be his.  He just couldn’t fathom not knowing or remembering her.  He continued to stand at her side mesmerized by the rise and fall of her uneven breathing and the beauty that was Bella.  She began to toss and turn, tangling the sheets and he could see pain radiating from every pore of her body.  He heard her call his name as if what was left of her heart was breaking into tiny fragmented slivers that would never be put back in quiet the right place again.  He thought of Adrianna the angel of time and memory maybe she was right it would be better for everyone to forget.  He could not bear to see Bella in such turmoil and unending pain, if forgetting would heal her and make her whole then that was what he would do.  He touched the small flask in his pocket and the leather pouch that she had given him and he knew what he had to do.  As he stood and lovingly watched her, trying to memorize every facet of her face and ever sigh and moan that escaped her lips she slowly opened her lovely brown eyes.  She blinked twice and then smiled a radiant smile that shone brighter than the sun. 

                                                                                 

“This dream is much nicer than the other ones.”

 

He smiled as he walked to the edge of her bed and knelt by her side, to clasp her hand firmly in his. He saw the life sparkling back into her once dull eyes.  She smiled so serenely and so lovingly it made him ache for what he knew would come next.   

 

“Bella, love I have missed you so.”

 

“Oh Edward I can’t even put into words how much the absence of you has turned my world upside down leaving a huge hole where my heart should be.”

 

Edward cringed as the words fell freely from her sweet lips.  He knew that Bella had no reason to censor her words she would never lie to him, unlike the blasphemy that had poured out of his mouth when he had left.  He regretted the harm he had caused her and would gladly do it over again if he could but he knew that would never happen.   He drew a ragged breath and tried to form the words that he needed to say.

 

“Bella please listen for I do not have much time.  I need to share some things with you and I hope that you understand and that somehow you will remember that you once knew a boy who loved you more than life itself.”

 

Edward could see the look of confusion filling her eyes and worry knitting her brow.  As she gazed into his eyes she pulled on her bottom lip and he knew she was already fretting about what he had to say.  She reluctantly nodded her head and waited for him to continue. 

 

“Bella I know when I leave here tonight you will have no memory of me or this conversation but I still feel the overwhelming need to explain and apologize for the things that I caused to happen.  I have always loved you even before I knew you I loved you.  I spent my entire existence waiting for you.  I was wrong for thinking I could walk away from you and I am so sorry for the pain I caused you.   I want you to know that nothing that happened was your fault if there is any blame it falls solely on me.  I made my decisions and I alone am to blame for what came next.  My love for you was so vast that nothing could measure the depth of my love for you.  Bella before you my life was a cold, dark and miserable place and then you came along and pulled me out of the darkness that had become my life. It was you brought my cold dead heart back to life and at times it was as if I could hear it beating.  I knew I should have left before things went too far but I wasn’t strong enough to leave you or to deprive myself of your company so I stayed.  I am so sorry that my selfishness has caused you so much pain.”

 

Edward had to stop before he came completely undone and became a blubbering mess.  He rested his head on the edge of the bed and felt Bella’s butterfly soft touch as she began to run her fingers through his tousled hair.  He marveled at the exquisite feel of her hand and knew that was just one of the many things he would be missing tomorrow.  She began to mummer soft words of love and comfort in his ear and he could feel the warmth of her breath and the touch of her lips grazing his skin.  Edward struggled to lift his head and see her troubled eyes looking expectantly at him. 

 

“Bella promise me something.”

He waited as she looked at him and nodded her head.  Edward knew she wouldn’t remember him come morning but maybe she would be able to somehow keep this promise.

 

“Love please don’t stop living.  You have to promise me you will get up each day and take whatever cards are dealt and make the most of whatever this life has to offer.  I want you to believe in the gift of love.  I know when I leave you tonight that all our memories will fade and our life together will be no more than a dream that never came true, our lives as we have known them will be over.  I know that time will pass and life will go on, but Bella my heart will remember when you were mine and my heart will not let me forget.  I know that if there is any possible way for my spirit to come back to this earth that I will find my way back to you. I love you always your name and memory will be etched in my heart for eternity and beyond and I will find my way back to you.”

 

Edward raised Bella’s hand to his lips and gently pressed them to each of her fingers, then her palm.  He slowly made his way up her neck until he found her mouth that was parted waiting to meet him half way.  He savored the feel of her lips and the teasing of her anxious tongue as it assaulted his.  He felt very much alive as if a million tiny fireworks were exploding behind his closed eyelids and the sensations that ran through his body had him shivering in want.  Edward struggled to bring this life altering kiss to an end even though it was the last thing he wanted to do.  He carefully pushed Bella away and let her head fall to rest on his chest.  As he held her close he felt the rapid beating of her heart and the shallow breaths she now drew in and out.  She raised her head slightly and looked at him questioningly. 

 

“Edward I know this is a dream, your lips are so soft and warm and the touch of your hand so soothing as if you’re taking all my pain away.”

 

He sighed and drew her closer to his chest so she would not see the truth hiding in his eyes.   Edward never wanted her to feel an ounce of pain ever again.  He knew she had endured enough for a lifetime already.  He would not let her continue to suffer because of him and his poor judgment. 

 

“Bella, my Bella I love you so much and it is for you I am doing the unthinkable.  Please try to get up each day and put one foot in front of the other and see where this new life takes you.  You just have to breathe in and out and know that there will always be someone out there who always has and always will love you.”

 

He eased her back on her pillows and stood beside her bed.  She was watching him as silent tears began to fall down her face.  He held out his hand to catch one and clutched it in his fist as if that would thrust all her pain onto him.  He would leave until she fell asleep.  He slowly made his way to the window before glancing over his shoulder.

 

“Edward please come back I don’t want to be alone anymore.  Just don’t go until I have fallen asleep.”

 

He could see her outstretched arms reaching for him.  That one simple request was all that it took and he was by her side.  He lay beside her and held her close to his heart.  He would do this one thing for her before he left, he would stay until sleep came.

 

“Love close your eyes and go to sleep. “

 

He lost all track of time as he closed his eyes and tried to ingrain every memory firmly in his mind.  He would not let himself forget one second of his life with Bella. He had no idea how long it was before she drifted off to sleep.  He lay perfectly still beside her and listened to her strong heart beat until her breathing evened out and her soft mummers fell silent.  The time had come.  He rose from the bed and gripped the pouch in his hand.   Edward quickly before changing his mind shook the memory dust in the air and watched as it fell on Bella’s sleeping body.  He could see the tiny particles floating like tiny dust fairies in the shimmering moonlight.  He knew in the morning any memory or idea she had of him would be forgotten forever. Edward could hear her talking in her sleep and calling out for him.  The hardest thing he had ever done was turn away from his heart and walk to the window.  He gathered up all reminders of the past before looking over his shoulder one last time.  He drank in the sight of his Bella, his love, the only heaven he ever wanted to know.   He pushed himself off the window ledge and landed softly on his feet already running to the forest.  He found a place to stop and he took the flask out of his pocket.  He knew that Adrianna would be here soon and that he had to finish this.  He removed the cork and turned the bottle up and drained the dark, bitter liquid it held inside.  It took his breath away as he felt a burn going down his throat and then back up again.  He had never felt such pain not even as a new born.  He threw the empty flask watching as it shattered into the bushes.  He cursed the vile fluid that by the light of the morning sun would have erased all memory of his heart.

 

“Edward come we have to leave.”

 

He looked up to see Adrianna standing before him.  She was so graceful and beautiful in a majestic kind of way.  When she took him in her arms and unfolded her golden wings it was mind altering.  She was indeed a sight to behold.  She took off and within seconds they were in Heaven’s gates.  Edward looked around and nothing had changed it was just as it had been earlier.  He could see the streets of gold, he could hear choirs of angels singing the most beautiful hymns ever written but amid all the beauty and perfection he still missed his Bella.  He hadn’t been sure what to expect but he knew that at some point Bella would be gone from him forever. 

He looked at Adrianna waiting to see what was to become of him now.  As her eyes rested on Edward he could see mercy and pity shine in her angel’s eyes. 

 

“Edward you know that I am the angel of time and memory.  I don’t think you really understand what that means but I am going to explain it to you.  When you went to Italy and begged to be killed I was watching you.  Bella and Alice raced to get to you but they arrived too late.  I watched as Bella held your broken body in her arms.  She was devastated and she pleaded and begged for someone to give back her Edward.  I heard her cries and that is why I brought you here.  I feel that even though your heart had ceased to beat it was still a good heart and you Edward were a good person. I think you lived an honorable life despite the circumstance you found yourself in.   I feel that had you been able to live your life you would have been a selfless person who would have changed the world for the better.  It is for these reasons that I think you deserve a second chance.  I had to be sure that you had Bella’s best interest at heart, so I sent you to see her and to see if you would be unselfish.  I know how you wanted to leave and not enter her room but you did it for her.  I know how hard that was for you seeing her like that and then to talk to her and touch her for the last time and yet you never faltered you did the one thing that broke what was left of your heart.  You chose to make Bella’s life better even though it meant her forgetting you completely.  I gave you the potion that at first light will wipe your memory clean, at that time I am sending you back to earth for a second chance to be human.  I hope you are able to have a chance at love, happiness and the life you were meant to have because you Edward Anthony Masen deserve it.  Good luck Edward now sleeps and when morning comes go and find your place in the world for no foot print is too small to leave its mark.”

 

He watched as she began to sparkle so bright he had to cover his eyes and then in a shower of light she was gone.  He had so many unanswered questions.  He didn’t see how he could possibly not remember Bella and even if his human mind forgot he vowed that some way, somehow he would find her again.

He fought to stay awake to not close his eyes but eventually he lost the battle and he succumbed to the effect of the potion.  He closed his eyes as visions of Bella filled his dreams.

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Replies to This Discussion

OH that was so cool. Edward and Jake are on good terms.. Can't wait for the next post Sarah!

Hi daZzLEr priNcesS thank you so much and I know Edward and Jake getting along?  Who would have thought it? But you know what they say love makes you do crazy things. I am getting ready to post next chapter in a few mnutes. Thank you so much for reading.

Hugs

Sarah

Oh wow that was so good and I love the idea of Jake and Edward being friends. I wonder how that will workout.

Post more soon please.

Hi Mariah thank you so much for reading!! Jake and Edward how indeed will that work out?? More coming in  a couple of minutes.

Hugs

Sarah

What else can I say LOVED it. waiting for more,

Hi Christina thank you for reading and I am so glad you loved it. Posting now!!

Hugs

Sarah

Hi Paula I love Charlie too he is quiet but he loves his little girl. I am about to post in a few minutes.

Thank you so much for reading Paula.

Hugs

Sarah


CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

WHY?

 

Edward had been aware immediately when Bella had left his side and he missed her very presence, her scent, the way her hair tickled his nose as she leaned close and the way her breath tickled his skin.  He knew she needed some time to herself so he fought the urge to run upstairs. He waited for Charlie and Billy to finish up in the kitchen and then excused himself for the evening.  Jake walked him outside out of Charlie’s hearing.

 

“So Edward I guess this is it?”

 

Edward walked around the house to Bella’s window.  He could see the light that her lamp cast on the wall and he wondered if she was still awake or if the eventful day had already pulled her into unconsciousness.  He turned to Jacob as he leaned against the house.

 

“Alice will take us to the airport tomorrow morning and then we go to Florida.  I don’t know if the Volturi will arrive while we are gone or if this will prove to be a wasted trip but Alice is tuned into the workings of Aro’s thoughts and she’ll keep you all updated on any movement on that front.  I wish you the best Jacob Black and I hope to see you again.”

 

Jacob looked at Edward and wished that he could hate him but he knew that he was just a boy now.  He was no longer a blood sucker who threatened to take the life of the girl he loved.  He didn’t necessarily like him but he no longer hated or loathed him.  He knew that he made Bella happy and for that he was thankful that he was here for her now, so he would tolerate him.  

 

“Edward keep her safe please, you know that even if there were no maniac vampires that Bella attracts trouble like a magnet.” 

 

“I still remember I mean falling in love with a vampire, only Bella.”

 

“And let’s not forget a guy who morphs into a giant ass wolf as a best friend.”

 

“Of course no normal best friend would ever do.”

 

Jake gave Edward a wry smile and shook his head from side to side as he realized how crazy Bella’s life really had been.  He offered his hand to Edward.

 

   “Keep her safe and I’ll see you both soon.”

 

“I will and we will see you again.”

 

Edward accepted his hand still vowing to protect Bella above all else.  Jacob turned and made his way back to the front of the house.  Edward listened for the sound of the front door before he grabbed the ladder from the shed and climbed in through Bella’s open window.  He could see her curled up on her bed softly talking in her sleep.  He walked to her side and listened as she whispered his name.

 

“Edward…”

 

He could hear the pleading in her voice as his name escaped her lips. He ached for the sadness that saturated the words that came next.

 

“Edward, please don’t leave me again.”

 

It chipped a piece of his heart away to hear her desperate pleas for him not to leave.  He now realized how much he had hurt her when he left.  He had thought that she had gotten over it and knew that he needed her far too much to even think about leaving her again.  He eased down on his knees and pushed the hair out of her eyes.  He watched as a dozen emotions flitted across her face.  He wished that he could erase the pain he could visibly see and the scars that he couldn’t see but knew he had left behind.  She began to stir and he watched as her eyes fluttered open and she turned her face into his hand. 

 

“Hey you what’s wrong?”

 

Edward smiled at her and shook his head, “What could be wrong when I am here with you?”

 

Bella laughed as she watched his face, “Smooth sir, very smooth and for the record I love you too.”

 

“I know love, I know.”

 

Bella placed both her hands on either side of Edward’s face and marveled at the warm, soft and completely human feel of his skin beneath her fingers.  At times she still found it hard to believe that he was just a human boy now.  She studied his perfect features and despite being human he was still the most beautiful creature she had ever laid eyes.  Even without the vampire aspect he was still a mass of mystery and wonder to her. She could see worry laced on his brow and in his darting eyes and she wondered if he was worried about his family or if it was something more.

 

“Edward what is it?  Has something happened?”

 

Edward was drawn out of his runaway thoughts by the sweet timber of Bella’s voice floating in his ear.  He stood to his feet and sat down beside her on the bed.  She immediately snuggled into his side placing her arms around his waist.  He held her for several minutes before attempting to answer her questions.

 

“No everything or should I say everyone is fine.  Alice would have called if something had changed.”

 

He could feel her relax against his side.  He drew in her unique scent like a field of fresh strawberries in May and a wintery mountain top in December.  How ironic warm yet cold like a vampire and a wolf. 

 

“That’s good but something seems to be bothering you please won’t you tell me what it is.”

 

Edward sighed into the top of her hair before dropping a kiss there.  He wasn’t sure if he could bear to hear her answers to the hard questions or if he could stand to see the pain reflected in her eyes.  He had always thought that her eyes held the key to her soul and he didn’t want to see what he had done to her reflected back at him.

 

“Bella I realize now that you remember everything that you must hate me.  I know I keep saying that and you keep refusing but we can’t act like it never happened.  If we don’t really talk about it will always be here like a giant elephant in the room.”

 

Bella knew he was right but she had gotten really good at pretending that none of it had ever happened. She wasn’t sure she could handle the truth. She buried her head in his chest and nodded for him to continue.

 

“Bellla I wish that I could take it all back so that you never had to feel an ounce of pain or uncertainty.  I would give anything to erase those memories of you here alone so sure that I had never loved you or that you didn’t matter at all; nothing could have been further from the truth.  Bella I need to know that you can move past that dark time that must be burned in the back of your mind.”

 

Bella could see it all playing in her head and she could feel the tears falling silently down her cheeks like daggers to her soul.  She had tried so hard to not remember but she knew he was right; if she didn’t ask the hard questions now one day the doubt would poke its ugly head out and she would be in the same place all over again.  She would always be waiting for the goodbye.

 

Bella pushed herself away from Edward’s tear stained shirt and swiped angrily at the traitorous tears.  She took a deep breath and looked at Edward for the first time with fear, doubt, questions and even a trace of hate.

 

Bella spoke in a hushed whisper almost too low for Edward to hear, “Why?”

 

Edward could see the fears and doubts laced with hate glaring at him in those deep pools of chocolate and it was as if someone had ripped a big hole in his chest and taken his heart in one fatal swoop.

He couldn’t find his voice as he drown in the pain that stared back at him.  Bella was now waiting for an answer and she asked again in a much stronger almost ferocious voice that sounded nothing like his Bella.

 

“Why?  Why did you leave me here broken and alone?  Did you wake up and decide I wasn’t good enough for you?  Did Jasper’s little theatrics make you realize what I always knew that it never made sense for you to love me? Did you finally realize I was just a weak human and it was just too much work to keep me safe?  Was I just someone to pass the tedious hours of an unending day with?  If so why did you say you loved me when quite clearly love was never an option for you?  Why?”

 

Edward’s hands went limp at his side as the one simple word why reverberated in his head. Bella’s words pierced his soul like arrows to his now beating heart.  He listened to the accusations and he couldn’t blame her for feeling all of those things.  He had given her no reason to believe he cared for her at all.  Of course she had thought that she was just a passing fling to a restless vampire but she had been wrong.

 

He raised his watery eyes to meet Bella’s fiery stare.  He took her hands in his and held them tight while holding her stare, refusing to let her look away from him.

 

“Bella I can see the hate in your eyes and it breaks my heart to know how much doubt I have caused you.  I never expected you to love me Bella. I was a vampire and you were this perfect human girl so beautiful, so full of life and so alive it was wrong for me to ever approach you but I couldn’t stay away from you.  I knew it was an impossible situation but being with you was more than I ever imagined and I fell desperately in love with you.  I knew it was dangerous and I thought I could protect you from everything physically, mentally and supernatural but when Jasper tried to hurt you I realized that my world was far too dangerous for you.  I never stopped loving you or wanted to leave you but I would not continue to put you in danger.  I left because I loved you and I thought I was doing the one thing that would protect you and keep you safe.”

 

Bella could hear the conviction and the truth ringing like a bell in Edward’s words.  She just couldn’t get her head around it, “But you left so easily.”

 

“Bella there was nothing easy about it; it was the hardest thing I had ever done.  To leave you here and to know that I would never be able to do this,” Edward ran his hand along her neckline and cupped her cheek in his hand, “or this again,” he lowered his lips to her neck and dropped soft kisses where his fingers had just been, “or to feel this,” he laid his free hand on her heart as if danced erratically at his touch, “the sound of your heart beat was like the sweetest ballad every written to never hear it or experience this again was more than I could bear.”  Edward then kissed her soft lips that immediately molded perfectly to his.  Bella had never felt more alive than she did at this moment in time.  She knew that he loved her and she had never stopped loving him.  She knew that even if he had never loved her that she would have always loved him from the first time her eyes took him in.  She could still hear Jessica’s snide voice in her head, ‘That’s Edward. He’s gorgeous of course, but don’t waste your time.  He doesn’t date.  Apparently none of the girls here are good-looking enough for him.”

Edward could feel Bella’s lips curving into a smile against his.  He gently ended the mind numbing kiss and tried to form a coherent sentence.  He looked into Bella’s laughing eyes.

 

“Is this the part where you kick me out of your bed and tell me to kick rocks?”

 

Bella looked at him as if he had gone mad, “Kick rocks?”

 

“Yeah you know me leaving so heartbroken and depressed that all I can do is pout and kick rocks the whole way home.”

 

Bella laughed again and covered her mouth as she heard Charlie coming down the hall.  Edward jumped up and disappeared in the closet just as Charlie opened the door.

 

“Bells are you okay?”

 

“I’m good just thinking about how great my life is.”

 

Charlie looked at Bella’s face and he could see the laughter still dancing in her eyes.  He hoped that her trust in that boy was not misplaced and that she wasn’t setting herself up to be hurt again. 

 

“Honey please think about what we talked about earlier.  I don’t want to see you put all your trust in this guy just to have him rip your heart out again.  I honestly don’t think Jake or I could put it back together this time.”

 

Bella knew that Charlie wasn’t being very open minded he was thinking like a dad.  Bella smiled at him and tried to say the words that he would understand.

 

“Dad he has a name it’s Edward and I love him.”

 

“Bella love isn’t all it’s cracked up to be its messy and it hurts so bad you can’t imagine ever smiling again.”

 

“Dad, I know how hard it can me how messy and cruel but I also know that in the end it’s worth it.  Listen dad, I know how bad it was for you to see me like that and I know it scared you.  I am so sorry for that but I promise I’m okay now.”

 

Charlie leaned against the door frame and studied the way she sat there so serene and calm.  She looked like she had no doubts in the world.  He was sure that she thought nothing could ever hurt her again but what if he left or God forbid worse?

 

“Bella promise me you will be careful.”

 

“Dad I love him and caution and love don’t really go hand in hand but I promise that I will never wig out on you like that again.”

 

Charlie crossed the room and kissed her forehead, “I love you kid and I only want the best of everything for you.  I suppose if he’s the best then I can live with that.”

 

Bella threw her arms around Charlie’s neck.  She breathed him in and committed to memory the feel of his hair on her cheek and the way his arms held her so tight as if nothing would ever hurt again.

 

“Dad to everyone else he’s just another guy with a beautiful face and an amazing smile but to me he’s the guy with a beautiful soul and a perfect heart and I love him.”

 

Charlie held Bella for an immeasurable time trying to separate the memory of his baby girl he used to tuck in at night and the amazing young woman in his arms now, where had all the years gone?  He savored this moment with his baby girl in his arms; he realized that she would always be his baby no matter how old she was.  He knew that before long she would be all grown up and most likely in Edward’s arms.  He pushed her away and kissed her cheek.

 

“Bella if you love him then I promise to get to know him.  I can assure you that if he hurts you in any way all bets are off.”

 

Bella laughed and nodded her head, “Dad there are no guarantees but Edward and I will be there for each other and we’ll work through whatever comes our way together.”

 

Charlie stepped back and looked at his baby all grown up, “Since when is the kid suppose to be smarter than the parent?”

 

Bella giggled again, “I get it from my father.”

 

Charlie grinned as he walked to the door, “Goodnight kid I’ll see you in the morning.  Sleep well.”

 

“Night dad, love you.”

 

“Love you more.”

 

Bella watched as the door closed and she heard Charlie’s footsteps retreating down the hall. She waited for the creak of the closet door and then Edward was instantly by her side.

 

“Edward I need to clarify something.   When you said that you saw hate in my eyes you were right.”

 

“Bella I am so…”

 

Bella placed one slender finger on his warm soft lips and shook her head for him to stop.  She then turned his face to look at her as she spoke softly words meant only for him to hear.

 

“Edward I didn’t and I don’t hate you.  I could never hate you.   I hated the feeling of abandonment, worthlessness, and unending pain.   Edward the very thought of never seeing you again was so mind numbing that I couldn’t function.  It was as if when you left you took the best of me with you and I couldn’t remember how I ever got along before you came crashing into my life.  Edward my heart remembered every touch, kiss and moment that you were mine and knowing that you were gone was also something my heart couldn’t forget.  Because of that I will be thankful for every kiss, touch and moment that I have you in my life.”

 

“Bella I love you with all my heart and you are my life now.  I promise to never leave you ever again.”

 

“I know Edward.”

 

He shook his head frantically, “No I don’t think you understand; even if you order me away I won’t leave.  I will never leave I will spend every moment of every day by your side.  I will love you, cherish you, protect you from harm and always make your happiness my full time job.”

 

Bella smiled like a peacock, “I know because I feel the same way.  If you ever tried to leave me again I would follow you to the ends of the earth.  So Mr. Cullen you’re stuck with me.”

 

Edward kissed her as the tiny pinpoints of light went off in his head and his body hummed.  He had never imagined that loving Bella could get any better but every touch and kiss was like the first time all over again.

 

“I guess it’s a good thing that being stuck with together is right where we want to be.”

 

“Lucky us.”

 

Edward and Bella talked for hours about what their life together would be like until sleep claimed them both to a land of dreams and a future more perfect than a sunny day in Forks

Esme these chapters were perfect. I love the portrayal of Jake and Edward as now friends and everything coming together. I am so glad Edward and Bella are going to see her mother and I hope all goes well with the others. I am so happy the Edward nad Bella talked it over and that things are great between them and I am happy Charlie is accepting this. I hope he finds someone to prove to him that love is worth it. Great work!

Hey Alice thank you so much and I hope you are feeling better!! I am so glad you liked these chapters. All I can say is have you heard the expression 'calm befroe the storm'?  LOL everythng is going so smoothly something will inevitably go wrong. Charlie is really down on love so it will take an amazing woman to crack the shell he has around his heart but we'll see what we can do. I love happy endings! I hope to post on all my stories in the next couple of days. Thank you for always reading and supporting me!!

Big Em Hugs

Esme

I liked it.

Hi Ange thank you so much for reading.

Hugs

Sarah

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