My story tell me what you think by likeing or whatever!
In the middle of the night I pushed myself over the edge. Trying harder to push my strength's ignoring all pain. I couldn't give in for any reason. My legs moved fast faster. I saw a light up ahead painting I kept working trying not to look back at anything at all. I had trained for this my whole life and nothing would stop me I shot up. I saw Erica up ahead I passed her without ease. "Don't show off Jamie" She yelled "Training for something won't help we've looked for her this entire night. She's not here she's gone." She continued I could tell she had stopped it was obvious no joke. I stopped and went back. "We can't just quit" I told her. "No one said anything about quitting." I just said that I think for tonight we have covered enough ground for tonight" She finished giving authority. I felt like crying. Tami had gone missing and we had no idea where she was. We figured she got hunted again. That was just a theory thought. "Mom's gonna start wondering where we are so we'd best get back." Erica finished. I had hesitation but I ignored it quickly. We managed to get back at three in the morning as always we sneaked in through the back of the house we passed Tami's room we had never opened the door ever since she left we had feared the worst but we didn't think about the bad parts only the good. I smiled at that. Erica went in her room and I went in mine. I settled in my sleeping cloths and then breathed in for a breath of fresh piney air. I drifted into a dreamless sleep.
I could have sworn it was morning. But it had been dark. That's odd I thought to myself I breathed in the air was musky. It had a strong iron smell almost as if someone had been murdered. I gasped as I saw what I was standing on Tami, Her long blond hair had been cut short and it was red now. Her use to be clear blue eye's were now a dark red. I felt like screaming! She had been alive but what was her body doing I found myself now to be clean. Her body was resting on a grave I sobbed silently. Then the similar strawberry smell followed. I looked up she was facing me. "Tami, is that you?" I asked nervously "Yes. I have found a world were I am accepted." She said. Her voice was no longer angelic now it was dark and mystephiying. "What happended to you." I asked her. "I'm a vampire now. Join me Jamie, I can share this world with you. We will be forever invinsible and also we will never be seperated." she said her words were convincing but I knew better. "No, I'm sorry I was never made for what you just turned into." I replied.
its good just try more spelling corretions nd put in the right punctuation nd it might actually look like a half a paragraph
Seems liget kk