The Twilight Saga

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My Thoughts -- My Bella ((Happy Reading & Please, Any/ All Constrictive Criticism, Please))

Half past six
Another potentially useless day spent
Alone I sit
Alone I watch
Yet another sunset upon my sacrificial past
And yet I ponder what I shall become
What is my very purpose?
What choices do I have?
Torn at the very seams of my eternally beating heart
Now blackened with that immortality
And at the vivid memory that I’d rather forget
But yet, the memory shall forever remain
As it always has
As it always shall
The blood that I’ve spilt
The crimson blood that has been empted
All due to my sacrificial past
Within my mortality and my immortality
With the blood-soaked tears that have been wept
Of this, my sacrificial immortality

Half past eight in the morning
Do I dare to even yearn again?
Do I dare even fathom yearning for something
For that someone?
Something and someone that I do not have?
That something and someone that is so very far from my reach?
The one that has gotten so very far out of my control?
The hours spent with her grow all too old rather rapidly
Go by ever so fast
But this is what happens
Day by day
When one is already eternally damned within a seventeen year olds body
But ancient with memories

Half past one in the afternoon,
Sleep does not come easily
To the eternally restless one
Especially myself
Caught up within the brushfire of my wanton memories
Once again finding myself in deep contemplation
Deep reflection and thoughts of my attempted death
Because of her
How can “goodbye” come so easily for an immortal
If heaven was kind
Even the archangels would have shown me
That mercy so very long ago
But does not a soul that bleeds
That mere immortal soul
Have the very aching heart that follows?
For what is truly their very aching soul that follows
For what is truly embedded
Within the bleak, blackened heart’s soul
Or the blinded mind sacrificed with lust
Of a vampire in love
With a mortal’s soul?

Whose very soul is severely scarred
For all eternity’s sake
Out of that forever constant fear
Out of that forever constant loathing
Condemning myself, personally
For that very sake of finding that eternal love
How can sleep come easily to the monstrosity
That God has personally chosen to condemn
That mere monster
That is now in the form of a blood lusting human
And is now apart of the sadistic, messianic monstrosity
Always forever damned
Shunned from sunlight
Forever attempting to “blend in” with the Human Race
But always is on the run from them

Do I run the risk of re-staining my already bloodstained soul?
With that crimson blood
From the most delicate, fragile rose
That slowly is the baseline for my beating heat
But even the most beautiful roses have their fare share of thorns
So, her thorns have slowly pierced my heart’s soul
Loosing all that pride that comes to those with that patients for waiting
I’ve waited an eternity and thereafter for my Bella Cullen
So, I await no more
The memories of mine fade into black-and-white textiles
Those memories of my wanton, sacrificial past
That lost child forever, eternally within me
Once lost since, has now become a man

She held my heart in critical crisis
Searching forever for that Godly light that only comes from within
Form only what could have been that God-given angel
And the boastful pride that beams within her
Never ashamed of what she is
Though an outcast
Celebrating her own life with little friendships
Loving and thriving upon the solace and solitude
That could only come from her yearning heart
Heeding her blood-cry, I brought her home
Though not afraid she was
She love me for what I was
Not what I’ve become
Loathing the fact that I alone have faced
The very hand and wrath of Death
Now condemned into hell upon earth
She is my solace
My heavenly grace
If God was an all-loving, all-caring God
Not that resentful God that everyone loathes and fears
He would have allowed me to bless my Bella with the same fate
That I alone endured
Upon my hospital death bead
I was prepared
But how does one prepare another?
When that other is a mortal
Already prepared her life for the outcome of immortality
Eternal damnation?
My Bella wasn’t afraid of me
Not in the beginning, not ever

Half past three in the afternoon
I waited until the time was right
Within our meadow we went
Eloping upon my Bella’s run-de-view with immortality
As I rolled on top of her upon the grass so green and pure
I whispered the eternal phrase that absolutely anyone would want to hear,
“I love you for all eternity”
Slowly kissing her, passionately, feverishly
Inching my way down to her neck
Blessing my Bella with what she always wanted
What she was prepared for ever since we first met
But I wasn’t prepared to give her
Why, oh why I wasn’t prepared?
When she was?
When she was, she was giving her my heart
Signing it away with the simplicity of blood
Gently, I kissed it
Before I blessed my eternally sweet, angelic Bella
With the kiss of death

– Kat Taylor 2009

Tags: ((Taken, --, Bella, Edwards, My, PoV)), Poem, Thoughts, from

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Replies to This Discussion

Wow.............
I'm actually Stunned!!!
That is absolutely AMAZING!
Wow..............
Speechless.
Wow............
:) xxx
wow, that was very intersting and very good. It has a few typos in it, but other than really liked it, honestly.
wow, it is amazing ! :p
very cool too :)
omg....wow...you are absolutely exraordinarily brilliant......wow words don't describe what you have wrote......fantastic job Kat
OH!..I loved it!..

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