The Twilight Saga

                              What if . Bella decided to reach over and kiss Jacob in her truck? Would that change how she feels about Jacob over all ? Knowing the feelings he has for her,knowing he could give her more. Knowing,she wouldn't have to change for him...

 

[Disclaimer]; not everybody posts the disclaimers in their fanfiction,but i'm going to. ;) Idon't own Twilight,or any of the characters in it. All belong to Stephenie Meyer- All though I wish I did.(;

 

A/N; I hope you enjoy ... :) & I'm starting at chapter 1 :)

 

 

 

                                            Speechless.

 

Chapter 1; One Last Look.

 

   My fingers were curled tightly around the steering wheel,as i stared out ahead of us. We were in front of Charlies-though his cruiser was missing. I bite the inside of my lip,my brows mashed together,listening to Jacob's breathing. He was staring out the window,as we sat in my old truck silently. Sometimes, I wish I knew what he was thinking,and then he let out a breath.

   "What are you thinking,Bells?" he asks,breaking the awkward silence.

   I loosen my grip on the steering wheel,and lean into the seat-sighing,"I,was ... Going to ask you the same thing." I tell him,glancing side-ways. He was still looking out the fogged window.

   " You really want to know what i'm thinking about?" he questions,now turning to look at me.

 

His stare sent shivers through-out my body,and his question made me think about how to answer. Do I want to know what he's thinking about? The way he said it,makes me wonder if it's a bad thing- something I actually don't want to know. But,maybe I'm just over-thinking. I do want to know what he's thinking about,but,maybe when I do know-I'll regret asking what he was thinking about.

 

I'm over-thinking... I think.

 

   I nod,"Tell me what you're thinking about Jake."

   He smirks,his eyes slightly lidded."You." he whispers."Always..."

   I sigh,and smile weakly."Jacob..."

  

   He shakes his head,and takes my hands off the wheel-and into his hands,mine so small compared to his. I look down,not wanting to stare into his eyes-knowing it would be for the best. I think. Because,if I fall in love with Jake ... I'm just going to end up hurting him,when Edward comes back. Eward will come back,I know it... Jacob is my best friend,and i can't stand,loosing him.

 

   "Bella,I love you. I've always loved you. And you know that,I know you know that." He sighs,"Bells,look at me. Please." I bit my lip,and shook my head.

   "I can't." I whisper.

 

    One hand disapeared from mine,and moved swiftly under my chin. Forcing me to look up at him,I tried to look away from his face,but mine landed on his. His gaze so intense,I couldn't look away. His hot breath was circulating around my face,the woodsy scent i always loved-intoxicating me. Wanting me to move closer to it. But I stayed where I was,our gazes interlocked.

 

   I was waiting for him to say something,but he just remained speechless;his lips parted-as in lost in thought. I bit down on my lip hard,as the silence intensified. Just when realization hit me. My fingers slowly,crawling up his arms-as his hands hooked onto my waist-pulling me into his lap.

 

   Jacob can never be just a friend to me. I've always seen noticed him,always known he was attractive to me in some way.But,Edward...

 

   "I can't hurt you." I mumble,my lips brushing across his in the process. I never noticed how close we were until now.

   "Do you love me?" he asks,his eyes closed-waiting for my answer.

   I press my lips tightly together,curling my hands into fists-agaist his covered chest. "I..." i press my lips back together,taking a stead breath.

 

 

[for now... watching Salt :3]

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Can't wait :)

Chapter 41 ; Unknown .
  
   "Bella!" I called her over to the kitchen,and glance behind me to see her fumming,marching up to me.
   "What,Jacob?" She asked,her teeth clenched.
   "I was just going to say-" I started.
   "Why'd you have to be so rude? So...Ignorant?" She asked,crossing her arms over her chest. "Those people are willing to help us Jake." She sniffled,wiping away a single tear,"With everything,and they don't even know us. But,they want to help me." She sighed,"Us."
   I groan,"You don't understand,Bella! It's a werewolf thing."
   She nods,"Of course,another werewolf thing! Anything else you need to tell me?!" She demanded.
   I shake my head,"No,not at the moment. Besides the fact that my brothers are coming home tomorrow morning! Expecting me to be there. Nobody but Seth knows where we are,Bella. And Jarred,but he won't say anything."
   "You don't know that!" She cried.
   "Sam doesn't know anything! Are the only people you trust vampires?!" I shouted.
   She scoffed,"That's not true! I trust you."
   "Really? Do you really trust me?" I held her gaze.
   She shifted uncomfortably,"Yes,I trust you. It's them I don't trust."
   "But you trust these vampires!?" I yell at her,"Those are my brothers! And they put their life on the line,for you." I spat,my jaw tightening."You,Bella! More than once! They took you in as family,when he left you! We all took you in as our own,when they left. And you don't trust them? Seth almost died,protecting you! They all love you Bella,because I love you,because they thought you were officially one of us. That you had left the Cullens behind." I run my hand through my hair,shaking my head,I look up."Just when I thought... That everything would be normal,for once..."
   She leaned on the kitchen counter,sighing,"I'm sorry."
   "No,you're not."
   "Jake..."
   I shake my head again,and walked past her,"I'll fix the door now. Then I need some air,I'll be back soon. Maybe."
 
I walked out to the car,grabbing my tool box-taking out the hammer,and a few nails to re-attach the door to it's hinges. It only took a few minutes,and Bella just stared at me blankly the whole time,biting on her lip,not saying a word. The only noise that came from her,was her slow breathing. I take my tool box into the house,and drop by the kitchen counter,then go back out the door.
 
   "I love you." I heard her whisper.
 
I slammed the door shut,and took off into the forest behind our house,stripping off my clothes,tieing it around my ankle before I bursted into my wolf form,my paws hitting the ground just in time.
 
   Jake! Embry thought excitedly,as I keyed in.
   Man,it's been awile! What,like a month since we've last seen ya? Quil thought.
  Can't wait to see you man. Paul though, Just so I can bite your head off.
  And steal my food? I wondered.
  He mentally chuckled,That too.
  Oh,yay. Let's all celebrate,we get to see Jacob again. Leah thought darkly,then her mind averted to thoughts of Seth,and she sighed.
   At least he's okay. I thought towards her.
   Doesn't change the fact,that you're stupid girlfriend's ex-boyfriend pounced on him though! I'll kill her! I'll get back at her for this. This is all her fault! Leah thought angrily. I guess everything she's been through with Bella had suddenly washed away.
   Not a chance. I said through bared teeth.
 
Sudden images of Bella evaded my mind,coming home to find a small bump formed at her stomach,her jumping into my arms. The fear in her eyes,at the thought of me leaving her. The anger evading from her,when she told me what I had put her through. The anger I felt myself,knowing everything was so wrong,because I left her. The arguement we just had played through my mind,but I made sure not to include too much. The stress clear in her face,her hands on her swelling stomach. Or at night,everytime we'd go to sleep,she'd sing a soft lullaby,trying to soothe the baby. Or the time I was in the Hotel,and my voice had calmed our child.
 
   Good on ya,mate! Paul thought, You sure hit that hard.
   Shut up. I grumbled.
   How come I wasn't informed about this!? Embry demands.
   Whoa. That thing is growing fasstt. Quil drawled.
   Leah's thoughts were blank as she absorbed all of mine,mentally taking back all the things she had just said.
   She's five months pregnant,Quil,calm down. Plus,Carlisle said it had something to do with it having wolf genes. And,I wasn't planning on telling everyone... I explained,briefly.
   Wait- She doesn't trust us ?! Leah finally shouted,obviously hanging onto my recent arguement with Bella.
   Ouu,wolf baby on it's way! Choo choo. Quil howled.
   I'm not sure. Maybe it's just her mood swings... I guessed.
   Huh. was all Embry thought.
   All that we've done for her! Paul errupted. And that... Ugh!
   I snort, I feel you,Paul.
   Well,knock some freaking sense into that girls head! Paul grumbles.
   I sigh.
   Jacob?! Sam yelled,phasing into the conversation. Reading through all of our past thoughts to clue into the conversation.Bella can't be that pregnant...
   Well,she is. I muttered. Her mood swings are retarded.
   That's crazy,Jacob. You should call Carlisle. To get her checked out. Sam offered.
   I groan, Will do.
   I mean it. Now everyone stop getting side-tracked,and get back to work! We need to be back by morning. Sam ordered.
   There was a chorus of 'see-ya Jake's' as everyone focused in on their mission.
   Gotta go Sam...
   See you tomorrow.
   Sure,sure.

 

 
 
I phased back into human form,tumbling over my head,and landing on my ass. I grumbled,shaking my head,to get the dirt out of my hair. I stand up,taking out my shorts out the elastic around my ankle,and slide into them,then start to run back home. No matter how angry I still am from Bella,she didn't deserve my boyish attitude. I am a year younger than her,I think she always forgets that. While she's eighteen,I'm still seventeen,forever. We'll have to move around a lot. We'll never be safe out of La Push,or Hoquiam. Those are the safest places we could be. But,we could never truly be together that way.
 
I got up to the door,and opened it-to find Bella sobbing quietly on the couch. My finger curled into fists,and I closed the door behind me as I walked over to her,in two quick strides. I sat down beside her,and pulled her into my arms,tightening my arms around her petite body,and kissing her face.
 
   "I'm-I'm,I'm so,sorry,Jake. Please,forgive me." She mumbled,incoherently.
   "You're already forgiven." I murmer,and whisper in her ear:"I'm sorry."
   She shook her head,"S'not your fault."
   "Just say you forgive me or not."
   "I forgive you." She mutters,her fingers running up and down my biceps."I hate arguing with you."
   "I know,baby." I kiss her cheek,my eyes closing.
  
She sighs contently,her nose brushing against my cheek,as she clung to me. I take her face into my hands,my tongue gliding along her bottom lip,before entering between her lips. Her hands slid into my hair,tugging gently. And I held her carefully,trying not to,er,squish her. I moan into her mouth,her one hand sliding down my chest,caressing my skin. Our lips moving in sync,soft,and warm.
 
   "I love you." She whispered,against my lips.
   "Mmm,I love you too." I replied,my own breath slightly ragged.
   "Jake?"
   "Yes?" I wondered,trailing kisses along her neck.
   "Are we going back?" She asks.
   "Where?" I ran my tongue along her neck,and collar bone.
    She moaned softly,"Back... Home?"
    "This is our home now." I whisper,kissing down her chest,inhaling her scent.
    "Okay..." She mumbled,bringing my face back up to hers,and kissing me gently.
  
We then just sat on the couch,holding eachother. There's moments like these in the world,when you know you love someone,where you can sit in silence,not moving,just sitting there,in eachother's arms,and not get bored. That's when you know,that everything,is just right.
After a few minutes,she had fallen asleep-so I took that time to go cook something to eat. Was nearing around eight at night,and we hadn't eaten anything since last night. She's sure to be starving,well,at least I am.
I turned on the stove,and filled a pot with water,placing it on one of the burners. I grabbed a box of noodles,and poured them into the boiling water,and started to stir.
   "You need help with that?" I quiet voice came from behind me,causing me to jump.
   "Crap,I didn't mean to wake you up,Bells." I scratched the back of my head,as she took the spoon from my hand,and reached over the stove turn the burner down.
   "You didn't." She replied.
   "Oh..." I bit my lip.
   "It's just colder,when you're not with me." She admitted,"I can feel when you leave,and I just can't sleep."
   "So I did wake you." I muttered,sighing,"Sorry."
   "S'okay." She yawns,and goes under the cupboard to take out the strainer,"Hold this over the sink please?"
   "Alright." I took it from her hands,and she followed behind me with the burning pot of noodles.
She poured it all into the strainer,letting the water drain into the sink,with only the noodles remaining in the strainer. She took the strainer from my hands and set atop the pot on the counter,taking out the tomato sauce and pouring it into a pan. She turns around to look at me,and smiles.
   "What?"
   She shakes her head,"Nothing..."
   I narrow my eyes,"Bella..."
   She shrugs,"It's nothing."
   I sigh.
   "Fine! It's,just I,was thinking of something." She finalyl admitted.
   I raise my eye brow,"Like...?"
   "Names..."
   "Of...?" I motioned with my hands for her to continue.
   "Our baby,silly!" She laughs.
  
   "Of course. Whatta ya got?" I wonder,hopping up onto the counter beside her.
   "Well,for a girl,I was thinking something along the lines of ;Persephone... Belicima,and..Jaelynn." She pauses,biting her lip.
    I smile,"Very... Unique."
    She smiles in return,"And for a boy,I was thinking,Zane,or Xavier. But,If it were to be girl,I really like Jaelynn Sarah Black. And for a boy , Zane Ephraim Black." She concluded.
   I smile,again. The smile literally painted on my face,I hopped off the counter,encirlcing her in my arms,"Beautiful." I whisper."I have a feeling..." I pressed my hand to her stomach,"That it's a girl."
   She glanced down at herself,"Are you daddy's little girl?" She asked in a whisper.
   Something moved beneath my fingers,and I gasped,tensing."Did you,feel that?"
   She nods,"I think she likes the sound of that."
   My lips trembled,and I nodded."I guess so." My voice was hardly audible.
Daddy's little girl... I let that thought consume my mind.

omg its sooooo good more more when is she going to have the baby??

I'm a fairly new reader and I LOVE!!!!! your story!!!!  I just caught up to where you are, today.  And I'll seriously die if you don't write more soon!!

Thank you ! (:
Your reviews/comments are what keep me going, and I can see that I am loosing some... Usually I won't add on til I get more than two reviews, it encourages me more...
I will try my best to update tonight ! :D

more more more i love it when you write storys like this please write more!

I just read this whole thing wonderful! Please don't let Jake die... or have them split up!!!! God this makes Edward look like a total jerk.... I LOVE IT!

yes i know i love it 2 and i dont want jake to die or them split up

*New reader (kinda)* I love your story! This has had me up sleepless nights just to finish because its so awesome! I'm not complaining that its long or anything so don't think I am k? LOL I love your story to say the least and I really wonder what the babies name is going to be! Can't wait for the next chapter!

.i really love your story... keep going!..  :)

Thank you ! :)

& I'm gonna add half of a chapter tonight :)

Jacob's Point Of View.

 

Chapter 42; The End Of a New Beginning.

 

Three months later ~

 

I cradled her head in my arms,as she let every tear slide down her cheek,every ragged breath catch in her throat. Her beat unevenly, as she unraveled. Sometimes I wonder if Life just felt like kicking us in the ass all the time,like Life was a bully and were it's main victims. I kissed her forhead gently,trying to hold myself together. I couldn't let myself go,not anymore,I have to be forever strong for Bella. I will be her everything,and anything.

 

   "Shh,honey,I got you." I murmerd into her hair,my eyes shutting tightly.

   Her sobs just continued,as she was unable to speak.

 

I sighed. Images of all that we've been through swept through my mind,as I held her to my chest- in our room,on our bed,in our house,I still couldn't get myself to call it home. Especially now more than ever. I don't know if it was karma finally catching up to me for all those times I secretly stole a beer from my dad,or, Life just litterally needed someone to throw around.

 

She raises an eye brow,"Did you really like her?" She asks me,honestly. Engaged in the story,the way I described her.

   I flashed me a wicked grin,"I did,yeah. Well, I thought I did. I knew it wouldn't last that long,because she waas older than me. " he rolls his eyes,"She's a pain in my ass now. Treats me like garbage,but that's normal because I treat her the same way." I smirks.

   "You remember her name then don't you?" She asks,squinting my eyes.

   I nod,laughing."It's embarrassing."

   Her lips jut out,in a sexy pout,"Oh C'mon. It can't be thaat bad!"

   I nod,chuckling."But it is! She's like three years older than me. And she's a complete bi-" I cut myself off laughing,as I think of something.

   I groan,and glare at him."Tell me!" She begs ,crossing my arms into her chest.

   "Okay,okay,okay. Fine... Leah." I admitt,finally.

   She bites her lip,trying to stop the laughter from exploding. But fails,and rolls off the chair onto the ground,clutching her stomach-and dieing of laughter.

    I sigh,and stand up walking over to one of the drawers,pulling out a wrench and examining it."Told you..."

   She collects herself,and is able to say,"Clearwater? Leah Clearwater?" She asks,not believing me.

   I nod,'Yeahh. Apearently she dated me out of pity. But that's only what she says now. Maybe that's why she hates me so much,but then she found Sam,and then Sam broke her heart. And now she's a bitter piece of crap."

   She stands up,and walk over to me,"Was she happy with you though?"

   I chuckled,my eyes twinkling."We had all sorts of fun together. Bashing the popular peoples' parties. The school dance. And ... Other stuff." I  trailed off , putting the wrench back into the drawer,and turned around to face her. "But I've never liked anyone ... As much as I've liked you." I whispered.

~

   She nods,"Tell me what you're thinking about Jake."

   I smirks,my eyes slightly lidded."You." I whisper."Always..."

  She sighs,and smile weakly."Jacob..."

~

We barged through the thick old wooden doors,and there stood Bella,unprotected.

   "Jake-No!" She screamed,her eyes widen,terrified.

She never really did have faith in me.

~

 "I love you," She murmers,"I really do."

   I nod,"I know you do." I whisper.

   She looks up at me,my lips pressed into a tight line-I was looking away from her."I'm really sorry,Jacob. I really am,I-I..." She sighs,"I don't know what I was thinking." 

   I let out a long breath,"Bella..." I shakes my head,and adjusts myself- I look straight into her eyes,"It was the right thing to do,for you. That's just how you are. You're thoughtful,caring,beautiful,sometimes brave-sometimes shy,you get embarrassed easily,sometimes you think everything'll be your fault,and you hate seeing people upset-especially the ones you love the most. Bella,you're ... Just,you." I lift my shoulders,and press my lips to her forehead.

 

   Tears start streaming down her face,"Why are you doing this? You should be mad at me,you should be ... Everything you're not being! I don't deserve this,I don't ..." she was lost for words,she couldn't piece them together,"Please forgive me,please... Just," I placed my hand over her mouth,rolling my eyes.

 

   "You're pathetic. I'm not mad. I'm a little upset,yeah. You kind of tore me apart,what can I say. You happy now? You tore me right in half when you left for him. Just when I thought I had you,I lost you again. You slipped  right through my fingers,and I couldn't gather you back. You wanted to slip away,and I couldn't stop you." my voice broke ,and she cringed. But I wasn't stopping there,"I thought you were leaving because you still love him,and if you do I can live with that. Well,I'll try to. I promised I'd never leave you,so- can you promise me something?" I ask,my eyes glazed with tears-but I kept blinking them back.

 

    She nods,"Anything. What do you want? I'll promise,I promise. Just,please-I'm so sorry." She mumbled.

   "Don't leave me." I whisper,"Ever. Because,that I can't live with. I can't live without you." I pulled her from her seat into my lap,squishing her to my chest. Completely aware of everyone else that could be watching us.Ot felt like it was just her and I in the room though. Maybe this should've been done in a more private manour.

   She placed her hands on either side of my face,"I'd never." She breathed,almost taken back that I'd think of such a thing."I'd never leave you Jake,ever. You're my best friend,my ... Boyfriend,though that seems as an understatement. You're more of a,my - lover. I guess you could say. I really ,really,really,really,really,re-" I cuts me off by pressing my lips to mine once,but it was enough

    "I get it," I chuckle,"And I really love you too."

 

Up until recently,when Rae had come in to check up on Bella.

 

Her face was suddenly a dark shadow,she looked down.

   "What , what is it?" Bella asked,impatiently.

I look at Rae,my eye brows raised-waiting for an answer.

   "She..." She trailed off,sighing.

   Bella's eyes lit up,as did mine."A she?"

   My eyes started watering,"Here that Bella?! A baby girl!" I seemed too excited.

Rae nods,though her eyes were filled with remorse.

   "What's wrong?" I asked,my voice flat. Almost a growl,she was hiding something.

   "She didn't make it." Her voice broke.

My jaw tightented,"You mean..."

   She looked at Bella,"I'm sorry Bella,you had a miscarriage."

Bella froze instantly.

I had nothing to say.

 

   "I'm so sorry,Jake." Bella finally choked out.

   I stared at her,"For what? You have no reason to be apologising for."

   "No-no,I do. This is all my fault. Everything. The Volturi,Maria,Edward,Seth,this..." She shook her head,"I'll never be able to make up for ruining your life."

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