What if . Bella decided to reach over and kiss Jacob in her truck? Would that change how she feels about Jacob over all ? Knowing the feelings he has for her,knowing he could give her more. Knowing,she wouldn't have to change for him...
[Disclaimer]; not everybody posts the disclaimers in their fanfiction,but i'm going to. ;) Idon't own Twilight,or any of the characters in it. All belong to Stephenie Meyer- All though I wish I did.(;
A/N; I hope you enjoy ... :) & I'm starting at chapter 1 :)
Chapter 1; One Last Look.
My fingers were curled tightly around the steering wheel,as i stared out ahead of us. We were in front of Charlies-though his cruiser was missing. I bite the inside of my lip,my brows mashed together,listening to Jacob's breathing. He was staring out the window,as we sat in my old truck silently. Sometimes, I wish I knew what he was thinking,and then he let out a breath.
"What are you thinking,Bells?" he asks,breaking the awkward silence.
I loosen my grip on the steering wheel,and lean into the seat-sighing,"I,was ... Going to ask you the same thing." I tell him,glancing side-ways. He was still looking out the fogged window.
" You really want to know what i'm thinking about?" he questions,now turning to look at me.
His stare sent shivers through-out my body,and his question made me think about how to answer. Do I want to know what he's thinking about? The way he said it,makes me wonder if it's a bad thing- something I actually don't want to know. But,maybe I'm just over-thinking. I do want to know what he's thinking about,but,maybe when I do know-I'll regret asking what he was thinking about.
I'm over-thinking... I think.
I nod,"Tell me what you're thinking about Jake."
He smirks,his eyes slightly lidded."You." he whispers."Always..."
I sigh,and smile weakly."Jacob..."
He shakes his head,and takes my hands off the wheel-and into his hands,mine so small compared to his. I look down,not wanting to stare into his eyes-knowing it would be for the best. I think. Because,if I fall in love with Jake ... I'm just going to end up hurting him,when Edward comes back. Eward will come back,I know it... Jacob is my best friend,and i can't stand,loosing him.
"Bella,I love you. I've always loved you. And you know that,I know you know that." He sighs,"Bells,look at me. Please." I bit my lip,and shook my head.
"I can't." I whisper.
One hand disapeared from mine,and moved swiftly under my chin. Forcing me to look up at him,I tried to look away from his face,but mine landed on his. His gaze so intense,I couldn't look away. His hot breath was circulating around my face,the woodsy scent i always loved-intoxicating me. Wanting me to move closer to it. But I stayed where I was,our gazes interlocked.
I was waiting for him to say something,but he just remained speechless;his lips parted-as in lost in thought. I bit down on my lip hard,as the silence intensified. Just when realization hit me. My fingers slowly,crawling up his arms-as his hands hooked onto my waist-pulling me into his lap.
Jacob can never be just a friend to me. I've always seen noticed him,always known he was attractive to me in some way.But,Edward...
"I can't hurt you." I mumble,my lips brushing across his in the process. I never noticed how close we were until now.
"Do you love me?" he asks,his eyes closed-waiting for my answer.
I press my lips tightly together,curling my hands into fists-agaist his covered chest. "I..." i press my lips back together,taking a stead breath.
[for now... watching Salt :3]
Just for now ~
this was a maby but when they were in the house together that was sure she leaned back opened and was ready finaly but dummy heard the phone ring and he thought it was more important MAN!!!!!!!!!!
oww!.. i dont like that bella had a miscarriage . its too bad.. :(
ok ok you have my attention i have always been in favor of j/b bring em together befor the blood sucker comes back in and breaks this up
The story is sooooooo good. Are Jake and Bella going to try again? Are they going to go back to the reservation because where they are at doesn't feel like home? Whats going to happen? Cant wait for the next half !!!!!
thank you all :))
I am continuing tonight (:
I scoff,"Bella,don't be ridiculous-"
She places her fingers to my lips,shushing me."I left you,more than once. I led you on. I tortured and played with your heart,and you still love me? You're right,I'm being completely ridiculous. Everything I do,it hurts... Everyone." Tears started to seap through the corners of her eyes,"Jake." She whispers,"There's something I need to tell you. Something I wasn't so clear about..."
I gazed at her,hesitantly,what could there be,that could make her feel this way? I know that this tragic news, would set a few triggers,but, there can't be anything worse than this. She's not the only one who lost a child,it was me to. It affects me too. I wanted that little girl. I wanted to be a father. I wanted to be able to see my little girl,with long flowing hair,and Bella's big dark brown eyes. My mom's facial features,that looked slightly simular to mine. She'd be a beautiful child. So,beautiful.
I raise my eye brows,shifting slightly-so she was sitting in my lap,and facing me."What is it?" I ask softly,running my hand through her hair.
She sucked in a deep breath,"While you were gone, I ..." She shook her head,"I did you so wrong Jacob! I went back to Edward. I let him hold me,I let him hug me, I let him ... Kiss me. I'm so sorry,Jacob!" She cried,then looked away,as if she were ashamed.
I gulped,speechless ; and not for the first time. I look away from her,and manuver her off of me,and she broke out into another sob. Why is she the one crying? She did it! She had a choice! And she chose wrong. Surprise,surprise? I shake my head,trying not to believe it. I couldn't. I didn't want to.
"I'm so sorry." She whispered between sobs.
Why did she have to throw this at me now? Just when we're told she had a miscarriage,is when she had to break this to me now? God.
"How could you..." I tried to form a proper sentence,but my mind was clustered. "How could you,do that to me,Bells?" I wonder,my brows mashing together.
"I-I,I don't know,Jake!"
"I gave you everything!" I shouted suddenly,turning around to look at her,and then took her face into my hands,making her look at me."I gave you,my soul,my heart. I gave you everything I have. I gave you my innocence." I choked out the last part." I gave myself to you..." Tears were pouring rapidly down her face,and I let her go,staring at a wall.
"I know! And I'm sorry,I really am! I should've told you,I know,I did you so wrong,Jake..." She mumbled all at once.
"Yes,you did." I replied,my jaw tightening,I clenched my fists,"You really did it this time,Bella."
I glance over at her,as she stared back at me wide-eyed,"Jake..." She suddenly,serious. Breathing in and out,to stop the sobs." You can't leave me. Please,don't say you're going to leave me,Jake. Don't,don't say that. Don't do it,Jake,don't leave me."
"Bella,we don't have a lot of time. We need to,we have to go stop him before.." Alice couldn't finish,she grabbed Bella's wrist pulling her forwards-but then I jerked her back.
"You're not going with her. Please,tell me you're not really going with her." my eyes were full of worry and pain.
She take a deep breath and Alice looks at her with pleading eyes,"Please Bella,we have to. He's my brother. He won't believe me if I go alone..." she whispers.
She looks at her,then at me." I- Jake." She turns to look at me,and I know. She takes my hand in hers,"I love you."
Alice runs out the door-probably to her car, then hear the engine start up. Before I can say anything,she runs out the door ,and open the door to Carlisle's car,and get in the passenger seat. Tears rising in the corners of my eyes.
"Wait!" I yell,running up to the black porche.
I poke my head through the window,and Alice leans back in disgust."Bella,please don't do this. If you love me... We could call this the test." I say,my lips quivering-tears falling one by one down my cheeks.
She paused,her breath caught in her throat."Jacob,I love you." I always talked about making her go through some sort of test,to prove that she actually loved me; when she said it. You could say this could be it. "I love you so much. But I won't be able to live with myself,knowing someone died because they i was dead." She tells me,biting down on her lip,"I just can't."
"Please,Bella. I'm begging you,please," I whisper faintly. Though knowing she's not going to,there's no chance.
She shakes her head,"I'm sorry." She whispers,tears spilling over her face.
if only that could be enough.
The memory made eyes water slightly. But,I breathed out in a sigh,shaking my head.
"Please,Jake! I'm begging you!" She cries,grabbing onto my arm.
I glare at her,and pry her fingers off my arm,"After all that we've been through! For God's sakes Bella!" I shouted,jumping to my feet,ripping off my shirt,tearing open the door,and slam it behind me as I ran into the forest behind our house.
It almost looks like you're on fire,Jacob! Quil thought.
Sam's gonna kill you. Embry says tiredly in his thoughts.
I don't give a f- I started but then shook my head,growling.
Don't get you panties in a knot now,Jakey-poo. Paul thinks.
I huff, You're one to freaking talk.
Actually,the correct term,is think, not talk. I'm thinking. Paul clarifies.
Whatever. I grumble.
Damn,you and Bella just aren't working out,eh? Jared thinks,reading through my thoughts.
Oh,crap. I'm sorry,dude. Paul suddenly says,catching the recent news I had received today,about the miscarriage.
Doesn't freaking matter. I mutter.
Jake... Go back to her. Seth suddenly thinks. She didn't know what to do. And he took advantage of her upset being. She always looked dead,until you came. She didn't love him,he always forced himself onto her. Suddent thoughts of his replayed all the days he noticed Bella shying away from Edward's touch,or the cries in her sleep,and Edward couldn't make them stop, but Seth could calm her down. Edward trying to kiss her,and when she'd refuse,he'd force his lips to hers,trying to get a response.
It made me growel.
See,Jake. She was just lonely. It was nothing. Seth murmers.
How're you feeling? I wondered,changing the topic.
Fine,I guess. I can't believe Edward tried to kill me though. He mentally sighs.
The treaty has been broken,and now ... I snarl, He'll pay for it Seth. He will pay for it all.
I turn around,blocking out everyone's thoughts,heading back towards the house,and phase as soon as I got to the backyard. I came through the sliding door,and back into our room where Bella was laying,curled up in our blankets. Her pillow case tear-stained. I sigh,and run a hand through my hair,going to my dresser,and taking out clothes.
I grab my suitcase from underneath the bed,quietly-putting the clothes into the suitcase. I go into the washroom,collecting all of my things,and tossing them into the suitcase. I rub the side of my head,as I pulled on a pair of track pants. I close my eyes for a moment,just thinking. Thinking of all the times I've spent with Bella. Starting from when we were babies,to toddlers,to kids,to teenagers,now. How much everything has changed in that life span of our relationship.
It went from playing with mud,to hurting eachother,leaving eachother,having sex,and the hurting eachother all over again. But,the one thing that never changed,was that during all of this ; we always loved eachother.
I open my eyes again,and reach down to zip up my bag.
were counting on u J / B and i dont mean jim beam
oh.! please dont let jake leave bella.. please..
if jacob leaves her i'm going to be sooo mad... but then again I don't really like bella period. She causes to much drama and make's everyone's life a living h- but don't make them lose each other.