Can You Learn What "REAL LOVE" is by reading the "Twilight Saga."

Discussion: KST112409 by Doc B.

Can You Learn What "REAL LOVE" is by reading the "Twilight Saga."

Introduction: In a recent episode of the American TV series "Days Of Our Lives," twenty eight year old Theresa gets in a fight with her sixteen year old niece. Their fight is about the meanig of what "Real true love" is. Theresa thinks that she has won the debate by pointing out an irrefutable truth.

She yells: "You can't possibly have any idea what "REAL TRUE LOVE" is because you are only SIXTEEN YEARS OLD. You are too young to understand what REAL TRUE LOVE is like ! "

But Theresa is both stunned and flabbergasted by her niece's response: "I most certainly do know what REAL TRUE LOVE is, BECAUSE I HAVE READ TWILIGHT !"

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Question: Can You Learn What "REAL TRUE LOVE" is by reading the "Twilight Saga."

As always we sincerely look forward to learning your opinion, to help us both better understand, and to enjoy more fully the "Twilight Saga."

Most sincerely,
Doc B

The "Rose Group" discusses a different question about the "Twilight" novels each day. If you would like to participate, all that you have to do is go to our home page http://www.thetwilightsaga.com/profile/BurleighJmatthew" and at the very bottom of the page the "The Blind Mice" will show you the current discussions. http://tinyurl.com/kpgvsr If you would like to JOIN the " ROSE" group all that you have to do is hit the "add as a friend" icon under the "Reading Bear's" picture, and your name will be added to our list of members.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 28, 2009 at 9:50pm

Reminiscing about Professor Buscalia today has gotten me thinking. If you had been in Professor Buscalia's class, and you had turned your response in, as an assignment of his: This is what he would have done, when he returned it to you.

He would have sat his big body on the front of his desk and said, "Class there is something I have to read you, that is realy quite delightful!" And then he would have read your first paragraph, looked up at the class, put on his gigantic smile and said "Isn't that just wonderful!"

And his voice would ring with that unbelievable tinkle of his which always said: "I am so delighted." And on hearing him, every one in the classroom would smile, because it would be just imposable not to. And then he would read on. And as he did, he would stop every couple of minutes and exclaim, "Just wonderful or Delightful!"

And when he had finished, he would ask you to come and get your paper. And as you approached he would say, "You deserve an especially big hug for that paper." And he would wrapped his giant body around yours, and then he would release you, and put his giant hands on your shoulders and said, "You must have had a WONDERFUL teacher!!!!!"

And then he would have broken into his most joyous laugh. And just the sound of his laugh would say: "I love you, and I love life."
And you would have been a little embarrassed as you walked back to your chair. But you would remember that moment for the rest of your life. And when ever you did, a small smile would cross your lips.

Doc,
Leo, told me to write his response to you. I would have just raved.

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 29, 2009 at 3:55am

Dear Brittany: You make multiple excellent and very important points. There are no perfect men and there are no perfect women. In his lecture (on his research into the dynamics of loving relationships, between men and women) Professor Buscalia makes the point that if you wait for "Mr. or Ms. Perfect" to come along, you will be cursed to live your life alone. (See: "Loving Relationships" by Leo Buscalia: http://tinyurl.com/yh5s6y2 ) He also makes the observation that the key to loving someone else, is first learning to love yourself. Edward and Bella's love of course is idealistic. And as such many parts of it are unrealistic. But the wonderful thing is that, as imperfect humans and lovers as we are, we can still find partners that we can love with all of our hearts. Ones that we can learn live for, and even be willing to die for.

Jane Austen "the mother of the modern novel" would be in complete agreement with your observation. In her novel "North Anger Abby" Miss. Austen warned of the dangers readers face if they confuse fact for fiction. She said: "Fiction and reality are as different as air and water. And if you confuse the two you run the risk of drowning. Unless of course you are a fish. BUT IF YOU ARE: then beware the air."
Thank you for sharing your insightful, and very correct observations with us.
Your friend, Doc B

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 28, 2009 at 6:48pm

Dear Reading Bear,
Introduction: A question on: “Real True Love” It is interesting that you should ask. Because, as I am certain Professor Buscalia would say, participating in the "Rose" group debates for the last four months, is easily as educational as taking a college course analyzing love. (provably even a graduate course)

Stephanie Meyer said that her goal in writing "Twilight" was to study “How love impacts on peoples lives." And so to study "The Twilight Saga" is to study all of the different types and aspects of love. (http://tinyurl.com/y8vbsrz )

Provably the world's most respected academic scholar on the subject of love, was the great Professor Leo Buscalia. (http://tinyurl.com/yfsz24o ) who taught a course that studied “Love” at the University of Southern California. I have studied the collected taped lectures from his class. (I just went on line to see if there was any way you could still obtain them, but sadly I couldn’t find a location. If I had, they would be xmas presents for..YKW.) It is truly a brilliant and precious collection) But having studied them I am certain Leo would say that just answering the “Rose” questions would be worth three to six credit hours under his instruction.

Question: Can you learn “What real true love is by reading “Twilight.”
Response: YES you can. To read and study "Twilight” can be the same as taking a laboratory course in love. Lab courses differ from regular classes, in that the students must actually go into the laboratory and participate in the experience of working with what is being studied. Which is exactly what "Twilight" can do, if you let it. “Twilight” teaches you about love in several different ways. First it explains the blissful joy of falling in love.(http://tinyurl.com/y8e4s5w ) And then it explores the different emotions a person can have once they have. Example: (http://tinyurl.com/ye9w8fd ) Then it teaches the DIFFERENT KINDS of "True Loves" a person can experience. (Team Jacob or Team Edward)

The counterpoint argument to my deduction of course would be: “You really can’t “KNOW” love unless and until you truly fall in love.
But that is where Stephanie’s “Twilight Saga” differs from most every other contemporary work. You actually can FALL IN LOVE while reading her Saga. (http://tinyurl.com/ya9fku7 ) And that is why so many millions of people feel addicted to her works. She accomplished this "literary magic" through “subconscious transference” which is made possible by her brilliant and insightful dialog, and by the lovable personalities she created for her characters. (http://tinyurl.com/yh5bzrd )
So my answer is: Yes you really can learn about “What real true love is by reading Twilight” Because, if you open your heart, you can fall in love as you read it. And that may be Stephanie’s greatest gift to our generation. (http://tinyurl.com/ydo8gge )

As always,your friend, Doc B

Job well done Stephanie, Job well done indeed. Somewhere in heaven Leo is smiling and nodding in agreement.

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 28, 2009 at 7:24pm

The reference to Stephanies addictive gifts is: http://tinyurl.com/ya5hqx9 I am not certain if it came out on my post.

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 29, 2009 at 2:54am

By searching the internet I located five public lectures
by Professor Buscalia. They aren't the same as taking his class
but they demonstrate his findings about romantic and non romantic love.
1. Loving Relationships : http://tinyurl.com/yh5s6y2
2.Love the ultimate affirmation : http://tinyurl.com/yztmzkg
3. The politics of Love : http://tinyurl.com/yjd5x8e
4. Speaking of love : http://tinyurl.com/yke4hv5
5. The Art of being full human: http://tinyurl.com/yj97hfo

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 29, 2009 at 4:20am

Manual Castro said:
Yes you can i've read the above it is true it teaches the beginning of love and the love you feel after the joy of falling in love,but it shows how strong love is what a person is willing to do to keep it. In the books you see both characters they...
5 hours ago

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 29, 2009 at 4:46am

Opinions posted at my blog. I forgot to leave message to post them here, Sorry Doc

Comment by Terri Nuxoll 7 hours ago Delete Comment I agree with your comment Susan. I still remember my first love. It is just one of those things that no matter how old we are that we will never forget. Comment by Susan Piner 1 day ago Delete Comment First love, usually in your teen age, is romantic love and hormonal love. It's strong and can't often be discouraged by others. It's the love we remember for a life time. But, true love weathers the ups and downs of life, the good and not so good times, puts the other person's needs and wants before our own. True love is not learned from reading the Twilight. Sorry.

Permalink Reply by Jiang Mei on November 29, 2009 at 10:34pm

Of course!! Just look at Carlisle and Esme!! To quote a girl from YouTube(Lol. I'm quoting YouTube people. How much worse can it get?), "The sweetest couple on Twilight with the purest hearts, Carlisle and Esme are truly a match made in heaven. They both love others more than themselves, and the love they share isnt physical or intelectual. It is in their hearts." ~DotsNSpots12

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 30, 2009 at 2:36pm

Dear Jiang Mei,
THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I TOLD MY WIFE HONEY: Her response: “Maybe so, but God help the man or monster that would try and come between Jasper and Alice.”

Permalink Reply by InLove With My Own Edward Cullen on December 7, 2009 at 3:08am

I Completely Agree! I Think They Don't Teach Per Se But Show What True Love Really Is About And That There Are Compromises And Sacrafices In True love... But Carlisle And Esme, Jasper And Alice, Edward and Bella And Even Rosalie And Emmet all Show What True love Is... They Dont Show That They Love Each other Only physically The Only Ones That Show In The Books Are Edward And Bella And That Is Only Kissing In The First 3 books Then Breaking dawn But Thats Not Why They Are Attracted To Eac Other They Are attracted To each Other Mentally... Which Is What True love Is About... How That Person Makes You Feel In Your Heart And soul and How You Can See That They really Truely love You By looking In Their eyes... So Not exactly Teaching But Showing What true love Really Is Yes! I Would Say For Sure!

Permalink Reply by GemmaJ on November 30, 2009 at 6:23am

Hi doc

First my apologises for my delay answer.

OK Do i think that we can learn about REAL TRUE love?

No, not if her reference is about Bella and Edward, however you look at it a love like that just isn't real. The intensity of which SM has written it, just makes it impossible to be real. There are aspects that you can pick from it, Edward doing what makes Bella happy thats real love willing to give them up if you are not what they want. Bella's disolve after Edward leaves in New Moon, we've heard ourselves from others that they have experienced the gaping hole left etc. But how ever beautiful their love is in the book it isn't real love, thats why i think the books are so popular is that we all want our lifes to be touched by this love and we know it doesn't exsist.

Jacob and Bella on the other hand you could use it as an example of true love in where a friendship builds to become more thean that becomes love, where you know everything about the person you love, without Edward they would of fallen in to love and a relationship easily, the way love is suppose to be, easy as breathing.

Do i think Twilight can teach us about REAL LOVE?

Yes, as we have discussed before in other discussion, the whole saga is based on love and i would totally agree, there are so many aspects of love throughout the books. It shows us family love, how love can grow between someone that has grown apart, friendship, unconditional love. All these appear in the books, all real and it could if we read deeper like we do that love is precious.

Family love - Bella, Renee and Charlie. Bella love for her parents is just what it should be doing everything to save their lives, her love for Renee although slightly backwards witht the parental roles reversed is mother and daughter and bestfriends. I experience this with my mum, she is my best friend, and i m sure there are many of us on here that feel the same way about our mothers. Bella and Charlie, a love that is there even in the beginning it isn't shown as much and developes into a beautiful relationship where they show their love for one another so much more easily and Charlie really loves her.
The Cullens, they prove just because you are not blood related that love still blossoms between them and they are a family not a coven, they all love each other even Rosalie loves her family even if she does not show it, as they frozen to love a mate is naturl but in their family you have sibling love and parental love, for example Esme's love for her children or Alice and Edward, its so natural and always makes me smile.
Seth and Leah, Alice and Bella, Emmett and Edward all they love is strong family love family is everything!(most of the time)
Unconditional real love - To except what ever faults with a person, Bella loves the Cullens and Jacob and her love is unconditional whaever they are, proves you can love even with faults(ok real life there are exceptions)
Real Friendship love - i think this occurs again and again, JAcob and Bella, Edward and Jacob but not until later on, The wolf pack, i love how Emily says "leave some for your brothers", they are not realated but there friendship and wolf bond of course brings a group of boys together that can share love and friendship.

So My answer is kind of, there are parts of the relationships in the books that can show Rel TRUE love but there is More that shows REAL LOVE

hope i make sense

Gem

Permalink Reply by Doc B M.D. on November 30, 2009 at 3:40pm

Dear Gem, So go to hear from you.
Gem, “a love like that just isn't real. The intensity of which SM has written it, just makes it impossible to be real. “ Doc I agree with you entirely ” I listened to a psychiatric lecture once on just that topic (Jung institute) He said “For a short time couples may feel that “INTENSITY” BUT IT ALWAYS HAS TO COOL OFF. If it didn’t, the constant emotional intensity of that magnitude would drive us all crazy. “
Gem “We all want our lifes to be touched by this love.’ Doc exactly right, even though as adults, in our hear of hearts we know that it would be possible to maintain a love like Bella and Edward’s had, in the long run.
Gem “Jacob and Bella ..when loving comes as easily as breathing. Doc WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL point! In today’s discussion Dr. Buscallia says that the number one key to being abel to have a long term loving relationship isn’t romance, by a long shot, it is COMMUNICATING AND SHARING!! Just like breathing.
Gem, “many aspects of love throughout the books.” Doc YES! Was Charlie’s putting chains on Bella’s tires not an act of “REAL TRUE LOVE!” Was Bella’s leaving her Mom, so that she and Phil could have a special time to “just experience being together” not an example of “REAL True Love?”

Gem “love can grow between someone that has grown apart” Doc, just as your insightful discussion on Charlie and Bella’s relationship taught us.
http://tinyurl.com/yfkn4tx)

Gem “My mum, she is my best friend” Doc “Aren’t the different types of true love wonderful. My Dad ADORED my brother and I, and we ADORED him. But I always called him “SIR” until the day he died. When ever I read about, or watch Carlisle I am with my Dad again. How wonderful it was of Stephanie to allow me to experience “Seeing Him” again.
Gem, “ The Cullens prove that just because you are not blood related!” Doc how insightful. Carlisle's simple statement of truth…. “She is one of us now!”.... Is one of my all time favorite lines from any movie, ever.
Gem “if we read deeper, like we do, that love is precious.” Doc, Yes as Doctor Buscalia would say “Love is such a simple subject. Of course the fact that it is the key to having a wonderful, joy filled, and productive life does make it WORTH studying !”

Gem,
What a wonderful reply (as yours always are). If Doctor Buscalia was reading it and he was standing next to you right now, he would take you in his arms and give you a giant hug and say. “That hug was because YOU GOT IT !! And because YOU are YOU!”

Your friend, Doc