Emily Michelle Weddle's Blog (19)

The next day, I could see in Jacob's eyes how weak he truly was. He could barely hold my hand. I felt horrible for what I had done. It felt like I needed to be punched in the face. I wish I HAD been punched in the face.

Jacob's hands were warmer than mine, which fluxtuated from semi warm to what felt like blocks of ice. right now was one of those times when they were ice blocks. that, however was mostly due to my mood. I really wished I hadn't fed from him last night. He…

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The smell of his throat barreled it's way down my nostrils once I was there. My eyes rolled back form the instant rush. I knew what was coming to me. And I knew I was going to like it.

I wasn't quite sure how to discribe his scent. I never did. All I knew was that he smelled amazing. Just being this close made me dizzy. His scent.

I smiled from the pleasure his scent gave me. Then my smile turned goofy. i knew if i…

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It's dark out, the cab of the red Dodge truck is only dimly lit by the glow of the green

numbers of the dash and the reflected light from the beams of the head lights on the knee deep snow. It's silent except for the whispers in my ear from the one I love who is sitting just to my left on the higher seat. The fingers of our right hans are twined together around my shoulders and his lips are only a few centimeters away from my cheek.



I try to contain myself, but I can't help… Continue

Wonderer of the Shadows”



I walk in the darkness

Alone and silent

I stray from the light

Away from the sun and the moon.



I steer clear of the knowledgeable

Away from the known



I keep to my self in the darkness…

A wonderer of the shadows.



The darkness is menacing

Swallowing whatever comes close



And because of this I am not completely alone

I have the others, too

Who are, too

Wonderers of the… Continue

“Blind Sweet Blind”



What is the meaning of love?

Is it real?

Does it exist?

You can’t see it.



The Truth:

Love is blind…

It crashes into you when you least expect it too

It invades, possesses, and swallows you whole

It sucks you into a deep black hole—an oblivion

It rips your heat out

And kicks you while you’re down

And it never stops…



But love is sweet too

Love is gentle

It lifts you u into the… Continue

“True Love to Be”

I sit here waiting for my true love to be

Sitting by this quiet see

Time passes without meaning to me

As I sit waiting by this quiet black sea



I wait and ponder of the little things

Dreaming of the feeling of flying with wings…



In silence and darkness I wait

Having no feelings of hate.



And faith is what is keeping me here

To finally see

My truelove to be



I wait for the

By the blackest… Continue

The meaning of Life”

What is the meaning of life?
Why do we exist?
Why are we here?
Where did we come from?
Evolution?
No where?
What are we?
Why have we come here?
In truth the process is simple…
We are born
We live
We die
In earnest, what is life?
Existence?
What is the meaning of life?

“Not Material Things”

You make me smile every day

I’ve known it was you from the very first

I see you in the darkest days

I honestly love you in the deepest of ways

I would wait forever if I had to

Just for you to under stand

I love you…



In dreams,

You are the one chasing me

But I’m the one chasing you in reality



You fill my mind with beautiful things

“What a wonderful feeling to fly with wings…”

But in truth I don’t… Continue

“End”



I sit in silence…

In thought…



Constructing words from my memories

And seeming to pull them out of thin air



I’m quiet as a mouse

Thinking of the words to say



I sit and sit

And so-far nothing I’ve written



Because my thoughts all circle around you

And the pain you’ve caused me



I’m thinking of the time when you were away

How cold I was

I could barely breathe



But if I could unblock… Continue

Dreamless Night”



I’ve lied here all night and noon

Waiting for the dream that should be coming soon



The silence lingers throughout this houses halls

The darkness stay

The blackness sticks for days…



If I could I would sleep

To dream the dream that has made me weep



But slowly the tears still flow

My sobs escaping soft and slow



Again tonight you’ve hurt me

Again to die this death so slowly



You’ve done… Continue

MISSING

I'm not sure how I came to know you,



but I'm glad I did.



I'm not sure about you



but I know I want you to be mine.



I'm filled with the throughts



that will torchure me



forever.



I'm terrified by the



nightmares...



Allthough I can't seem to help myself.



You fill me with the feeling of wonder.



You never fail to make me blush.



Your never… Continue

In Love

take care of my heart,

because i've givven it to you.

Be honest with me,

even if it hurts.

Don't keep secrets from me,

I want to know,

even if it's bad.

Don't lie to me,

I don't like that.

Don't leave me

I need you.

Catch me,

I've fallen for you.


--Emily Michelle Weddle

We may just be friends,





but i want to be more.





You might not know,





but I want you to.





I keep secrets from you,





even though I know I shouldn't.





I dream about you almost every night,





and I can't tell you,





because I know





you won't understand.





Thoughts of you fill my head





almost every second of every… Continue

OMG! I'm so nervous and I don't know why. It's kind of weird. I'm so calm though, but my shaking is making me ansous. I have no clue why, but I'm in a wonderful mood today.



And guess what, this morning, I talked to Dereck before I left my third period class. See what happened was that I was in there a little late doing some extera credit, and he just out of the blue started talking to me. It was strange usually, I'm the one that strikes up the conversations. But it was realy cool at… Continue

I SWEAR,I'm sofriggi' bored it's not even funny. there's nothing that's loading fast enough today. I realy don't have much else to do eccept for this. God sometimes I hate life.

OMG! Headaches suck! On the upside though, I get to write a blog entry, so hopefully it will slowly fade away. lOl.

And even though Dereck is back at school, I don't think that any amout of staring would help the stupid thing. lOl. you know, I wish that we could live in a world where if someone loved you with every part of them, with no empty spaces for anything else to fill, then you would have no other choice but to love them back. Though that would probably be difficult to do when this… Continue

Well, first of all, I'd like to say thank you to averyone who posted a coment. You guys did make me feel a bit better, I even smiled ! the advice is good to get and it will help me out. By the way Alice, if you haven't checked your aproved friend requests yet, I added you! But back to why I'm still feelling low. It's becuase Dereck isn't here today. The emptyness SUCKS!!! I miss him SO much! I feel even wrse today-which is worse than yesterday. OMG! I think I'm… Continue

Tanks for the comment alice, I truely opriciate your inthusiasm. And if it weren't for Dereck not being here at school today, beleive me I think I would go for it. And as I sit here listening to bella's lulllaby I can't seem to take my mind off the fact that the two of us aren't in the same building together. Even last week when he was on vacation, I hated the space sepperating me from him with a pation. Does that sound weird? Oh well, I honestly don't care. By the way Alice how did you… Continue

today has been utterly borring as usual. I can't seem to ever get used to beeing a teen. It's weird. I mean seriously, school doesn't realy helpout much when ur on ur period. Boys seem to never notice-as usual. And mom and dad are always trying to understand what they can't comprehend-it's actually not thet hard. Seriously! There is , hwever , one exeption to the school thing. My best guy friend, Dereck. I think he's just about the sweetest guy there is. He's tall, has long soft dark hair, and… Continue