I’d hate to shatter the dream world you live in — the one where the sun is orbiting the place where you stand — so I won’t tell you how little I care what your problem is. Go. Away.
Jacob Black, Eclipse, Epilogue
Added by Elmo Cullen on June 3, 2010 at 9:29pm —
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 30, 2010 at 8:56pm —
The Mad Hatter: Have I gone mad?
[Alice checks Hatter's temperature]
Alice Kingsley: I'm afraid so. You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are.
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 12, 2010 at 5:02pm —
Nick Stokes: Hey, Greg
Greg Sanders: [looking through the microscope] Shh! I might be looking at the mother of my children here.
Nick Stokes: Somebody's been putting in way too much overtime.
Greg Sanders: No, man, this is serious. I had a date last night and this girl has the most impossible green eyes. Just... BAM! Shoulder-length blonde hair, intelligent, and she smells so good.
Nick Stokes: Cute toes?
Greg Sanders: Oh, ideal!
Nick Stokes: Mmm.
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 12, 2010 at 4:59pm —
I believe that. But I want you to know something — when it comes to all this enemies nonsense, I’m out. I am a neutral country. I am Switzerland. I refuse to be affected by territorial disputes between mythical creatures. Jacob is family. You are… well, not exactly the love of my life, because I expect to love you for much longer than that. The love of my existence. I don’t care who’s a werewolf and who’s a vampire. If Angela turns out to be a witch, she can join the party, too. Bella Swan,… Continue
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 9, 2010 at 3:43pm —
Brian Griffin: I don't know. I guess taking care of this old woman will be just like babysitting, only with bigger diapers.
Stewie Griffin: Aha! So they *do* make bigger diapers! That deceitful woman told me I'd have to learn to use the toilet! Well, fie on the toilet! It's made slaves of you all! I've seen it sitting in there, lazy, slothful, porcelain layabout feeding on other people's doo-doos while contributing nothing of its own to society!
[runs to toilet]
Stewie Griffin:… Continue
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 6, 2010 at 10:58am —
Fry: That could be my beautiful soul sitting naked on a couch. If I could just learn to play this stupid thing.
Bender: Oh, but you can. But you may have to metaphorically make a deal with the devil. And by "devil", I mean Robot Devil. And by "metaphorically", I mean get your coat.
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 6, 2010 at 10:55am —
"I tend not to believe people; they lie. The evidence never lies."—Gil Grissom
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 6, 2010 at 10:53am —
Gil Grissom: A Harvard professor conducted an experiment. Asked a bunch of students to watch a basketball game - count the number of times the ball was passed.
Captain Jim Brass: Yeah? Groundbreaking.
Gil Grissom: During the game a person dressed in a gorilla suit ran across the court. Afterward, the professor asked the students if they noticed the gorilla. Fifty percent responded, "what gorilla?"
Captain Jim Brass: That's wonderful, Gil. If I see a gorilla, I'll arrest it.
Added by Elmo Cullen on April 1, 2010 at 2:46pm —
Gil Grissom: I can't tell whether he's brilliant or nuts.
Captain Jim Brass: Sound familiar?
Added by Elmo Cullen on March 31, 2010 at 8:41pm —
Added by Elmo Cullen on March 31, 2010 at 2:40pm —
Added by Elmo Cullen on March 31, 2010 at 10:27am —
[Grissom admits to a mistake]
Gil Grissom: What?
Nick Stokes: Well, it's just that most people don't admit to being wrong.
Gil Grissom: I'm wrong all the time. It's how I get to "right".
Added by Elmo Cullen on March 29, 2010 at 9:19pm —
Gil Grissom: Where's your enthusiasm?
Greg Sanders: Whenever I find a match in here, my world gets a little smaller. Out there I felt large.
Gil Grissom: Out there means a pay cut.
Greg Sanders: I'm not about the money.
Added by Elmo Cullen on March 25, 2010 at 10:13pm —
I just got a page from James Watson.
And I got one from Francis Crick. What's going on, Greg?
Well, as you both know, Watson and Crick are the granddaddies of DNA.
Without their discoveries, I'd have nothing to do all… Continue
Added by Elmo Cullen on March 24, 2010 at 9:57pm —