Edwards Journal

This is a journal entry from Edwards journal. After he got the call of Bella's accident. If you like it comment plz! I may be inclined to go back and start from the beginning if I get enough positive comments!

Bella. The name actually hurts to think of, feeling like a blade in my heart. I have caused this. I should have never left. HA! I should have never spoke to her. She would be alive and enjoying life. Probably dating someone. . . No I had to be selfish, and now she is gone. I should be the one who . . .oh I cannot think it! Surely, God would still let her in. She is an angel and the rules don't apply to angels. She deserves to be there. Isabella. My Bella. I will see her soon, I hope. If Carlisle is right. But if he is wrong, if there is no after for our kind, then at least my suffering would be over. God! I might as well have thrown her from that cliff and I worry of my own suffering! I am utterly disgusting! A horrible creature I am. I hope and pray that, given my family finds this, they understand. No doubt Alice already knows. I will not live with out my love. I love her, I do. Even with all the atrosities I have commited to her, I love her. I love you, Bella. I will be with you soon.