It hurts so much.....I cant breathe...

I look back on my mistakes....I am scared for the future... As certain as I like to pretend I am, Failure lurks out there like a menace that cant be identified... Except I can identify it... failure is me.... I am the only thing holding myself back... my fear of failing i fear will cause me to ultimately fail....Am I to much of a masochist to allow myself to succeed... to let myself find her.... they say time flies when your having fun, but I feel life will be over before its begun...What part of myself am i willing to sacrafice to be successful... Will I have to give up the part of me that feels like I dont deserve success, deserver her,... Can I give that part of me up...? As selfish as I would like to be... I'm not that guy, Call me a marytr, but I dont want to cause anyone pain. I feel pain all around me including my own, but who am i to compare my pain like some greek tragedy... how dare I consider my pain significant, stop belowing like an infant.... My deserving of pain only scares me that I welcome pain.... I want to feel the worst pain, because maybe then the pain will strip me to my utmost vunerability and then I will finally feel like I deserve.... Happiness



-Kurt Keach

The Key to Sucess is Failure
-Kurt Keach


Happiness is a Bullet to your Chest
- Clarence Greenwood