With Anne Marie, it's always been a roller coaster, for lack of a better word to describe, I have been in love with her since we were in our Freshman year, and she sang a song with this amazingly soulful voice at a dance we had and as everyone slow-danced with their date and I just watched her in awe. She was so into the music and just seemed to let the world and her worries fade away.
She has always been in my life, and its not always been easy, like I said before, a roller coaster I believe? Well, she has been through a lot, too much in my opinion, for one person to go through. Her mother tried to commit suicide when we were in 4th grade and it just about killed her to see her mom like that and not be able to help her.
There were nights that she cried and cried and didn't know why... She would call me and I would have to try to calm her down, as well as a 5th grade boy who had no idea what she was going through could.
Then one day in 8th grade she came to class with a big hoodie on...I got a little suspicious since it was mid-August and 80 degrees outside. When I caught up to her and asked her what was going on she just brushed it off as being cold.
But I was worried so when I went to touch her arm and she flinched I and move her head to the side so I couldn't see her face. So, I took her by the hand and asked what was wrong and that I just wanted to help... Then, thank goodness, she took off her hoodie and I saw to my horror and dismay that she had cut all down her left arm and it scared me because I didn't know what to do. I just looked at her in the eyes and she started crying. I hugged her...cursing myself since that was all I could do at that point of time.
As I got home today after a god awful day at school and football practice. Sweaty and weary, I went and dropped my keys, but I couldn't shake this feeling that something was wrong. So I took a much needed shower to see if that would help, when it didn't I decided to call Ann Marie to check on her.
It's crazy how much of the bad feelings I have radiate from this one tiny girl... If you were to look at her, you wouldn't be able to tell her different from any other girl our age, except for her height and style of course, but other than that she seems normal to the common passerby er... But when you've been in her life as long as I have, that perspective does a complete 180!
As I dialed her number and waited for it to ring, I was all fidgety as I hoped she was okay, but I was dead wrong...
When she answered the phone I immediately knew what was wrong. She had a serious catch in her throat and by the time she asked me to come over she had started to cry big time. So even before she was finished talking I had run down stairs to my keys and out the door.
I sped down the street which separated our houses and it was an interesting ride, trying to keep my mind on the road and her at the same time was a difficult task, which I advise anyone and everyone not to do...
When I drove into her driveway, I practically threw the stick in park and jumped out of my Jeep as fast as I could, as I tried to calm myself down so I would actually be able to speak when I got to her. I slowed down my pace a little, catching my breath as I walked down the walkway that we had made when we were in the 5th grade.
As I got onto the porch, I could hear her running down the hallway to the door and when she opened it, she didn't hesitate before literally throwing herself in my arms crying her eyes out... I don't know why, but this surprised me... After all these years, it still stunned how she trusted me so much.
Anyway, after about a minute of this, I realized she wasn't going to want to move by herself anytime soon, so I just scooped her up into my arms... And it astounded me how light she was!...I knew she was small, but she couldn't have weighed more than 110 pounds! I could have benched her easily... And at 5 foot 3 she fit perfectly in my arms... I enjoyed being able to protect and comfort her, if not forever, I could at least do it for those few moments walking up her staircase and down the hall to her bedroom.